Sammurailord

There is nothing redeeeming about this steaming waste of vomit and sewage the acting is some of the worst ever done in screen it gives us the worst depiction of Los Vegas and worst of all it uses product placement of junk food gross thanks a lot verhooeven you made me grossed out from burgers there is no much I can go to how I despise this travesty and cinemetic abomination every actor and member of this world should be raging hatred against this I hate showgirls with every fiber in my being I hate it for giving junk food a bad name I hate it for career ending Berkeley’s dreadful career she Could well be the worst actress of all time I hade it for how it’s best described as everything wrong with the movie industry and how it has the worst filmmaking ever the director ought to die for this crime against the movie industry I hate it for how anyone can claim it misunderstood classic which it isn’t it is a bad movie on every account I hate it for how it is in appropriate and not suitable for watching naked women do some of the worst and most corniest dance sequences ever I hate it for how nauseating it is too look at and how it’s setting of women in junky looking clubs and food courts make me more nauseous I hate it just as much as I hate the emoji movie and how rarely I could threaten to burn this world to the ground and save everyone from the existence of this atrocitt I hate it how everyone else should and doesn’t deserve any fan base there is nothing to like about it it is ugly, repulsive, disgusting, too flashy and nauseating it is to watch I hate it for how it’s the equivalent of getting your stomach churned and being forced to endure water torture to the eyes and ears I hate it for how it makes Kyle maclaughlan look like the worst actor in film history this is his very worst movie I hate it for the fact that Roger ebert didn’t even give it a complete zero why didn’t he is beyond me. How can anyone like such a bright colored vomitfest that is not a movie rather than just a junk food add that grosses you out from eating your favorite sandwiches. And that it makes you hate women and it sexual uses them more than the transformers movies and that it’s well deserved of its razzies and is the very worst movie of 1995 there is nothing good about it there is no heart, no charisma, no emotional impact or investment, no tension and that I’d rather have a heart attack than be forced to endure watching $hit girls aka the worst porn movie in the world and that whoever likes this movie is wrong and has no good taste in film whatsoever do yourself a favor and make sure everyone in the universe mauls this movie without any sympathy don’t let anyone like it because whoever Does even in the slightest should get sentenced to death it is an abomination and just as forbidden to like as a worldwide terrorist leader or war criminal 0/100

Easily the greatest submarine film ever and way better than hunt for red October the characthters are compelling the plot is strong and the direction from tony Scott and producing from Simpson/bruckheimer are on the spotlight this is a tension packed ride with non stop thrills and excellent performances RIP gene hackman

Screw Dante’s peak volcano 1997 is the superior disaster film why doesn’t this film get more praise it has thought provoking drama and thought, the charachters are compelling Tommy Lee jones is phenomenal in this movie better than the worst James Bond actor that is pierce mother$$$$$ Brosnan and the CGI is convincing with human emotions and dramatic tension you can easily relay to some of these charachters and their motives this is like a Roland emmerich film and in our perfect world it was he who made it this movie needs more attention it’s far better than other dismissed films like godzilla or Armageddon it’s better than those pieces of crap and far more compelling and not mindless. I give this disaster masterpiece an A

What a dissapointment this movie looked like it could have been an interesting prehistoric adventure film since it hasprehistoric creatures in it but it fails wit poor script, mediocre acting, and an inconsistent tone along with a lackluster villain, there are some elements that can be interesting but don’t work due to poor excecution and I heard a lot of terrible things of this movie because I always expect emmerich to make a great blockbuster epic with likeable charachters an involving narrative with drama and tension and most of all exciting action he was capable of making an intelligent serious history film with the patriot and anonymous ( which was his third a attempt ) but his second falls flat hard to imagine how much negative were critics on this film but I can’t give it a complete zero only because of the potential it has as well as it’s CGI and visuals this film is also inaccurate in its portrayal of prehistory did mammoths or even tigers with saber teeth exist in the bc year of 10,000 and why do the caveman speak English which they didn’t since back then they did either sign language or spoke the language of apes perhaps one of the ways they could have made this great is they could have just made this into a foreign language film with completely non English language and that there would be subtitles when they speak primate language. and while I can’t say this is not as bad as the uwe boll lord of the rings knock off ( which came out the same year as this wasted potential ( 2008 ) ) it’s better because it’s made by a far more talented director it’s stil a huge dissapointment I’m not sure what emmerich was thinking or if he even read the script but ambition here was wasted as a result it ranks as one of the acclaimed blockbuster directors worst movies there is a good adventure film to be made about prehistoric people and animals but this isn’t it

One of the most boring films ever made what was will smith thinking of doing nepotism with his son so insulting Jaden can’t act and his charachter is so unlikeable he reminds me of a kid who is abusive to his father how cruel, the plot is so inconsistent, poorly paced and lacking any interest in rooting for the CGI is awful it makes that of the prehistoric creatures in 10,000 bc look masterful. I almost fell asleep after that mid act of Jaden sky diving they barely show the monsters faces it must be because of how bad they look yes the CGI special effects are so bad they don’t bother showing them on screen. There is no charisma, no emotion and no drama or suspense it’s sleep inducing all around I feel bad for will smith what was he thinking this is perhaps the worst movie he has ever done his worst film since wild wild west. M night shyamalan shame on you I give after earth a whopping 1/5

Here it is the only true/actual good Steven seagal film this film is a lot like die hard on a ship the martial arts from seagal are the best he has done, the acting is solid, and we have a decent villain I know the film is still not perfect and doesn’t exactly have the intelligence or bold profound storytelling that die hard, terminator , the rock, Rambo, robocop raiders of the lost ark, but it’s still a solid action film from the early 90s and you can imagine how Steven seagal actually is a good film as all his other films have run from mediocre to downright atrocious and dreadful. Here he actually puts in effort to give a decent if not great performance.This is the seagal film worth watching skip everything else

This is without a doubt the best revolutionary war film hollywood gave us god bless Roland emmerich and dean Delvin for making this cinemetic blessing and one of the greatest films ever made I love this movie sososososososososososososo much it is a masterpiece on every level from the powerful and sophisticated storytelling to the gripping narrative ( which is the equivalent of reading a book ), to the tremendous performances from Mel Gibson, heath ledger, Jason Issac’s, Chris cooper among the rest of the cast all of them are great. This has some of the best cast enembles ever, I loved the deep and Exciting charachters and their interactions, Isaac’s made a great villain, and the battle scenes were astonishing its like emmerich wanted to be the next John ford and he succeeds across the board seriously give this guy an Oscar already he is a major directing talent, Independence Day, stargate, day after Tommorow, White House down, midway he is an amazing directing talent he is like the German Spielberg a master of epic scale storytelling and epic scale action set pieces here. I love how this represents a message of courage, passion and valor and does it’s test in depicting the historical events as real as possible the red coats and American soldiers look acccurate to the ones in real life it’s like this was an actual doccumentary and that gibson’s ben Martin is a real life war hero he is a very likeable protagonist and one of the best film heroes of all time he is so likeable and well develops you feel for him and his need for revenge and helping win the war and saving his people. This is one of those cinemetic masterpieces that should be shown in school what A+ tier quality filmmaking is it is a very special film and an epic must see a profound tribute to the revolutionary war George Washington ought to be proud if he lived to see this This gets my highest rating of a perfect 10

I always knew these religious films are made to present a message. It they all end up being crap all togeather and this one marks a new low of them all watching this movie is more torturous than getting dissected and eaten alive by a blood eagle it’s awful it’s the equivalent of facing your own worst enemy and watching something of someone hating on your own family and listening to bulllies how godawful I hate that with a passion mean spirited to the point of despair I would never prefer school jerks over parents I will always love my parents and hate on jerks. Pissing match of egos and F$$$ their vanity to this movie nothing is redeeming about it and like the other religious travesties it should be erased from existence o stars it is well deserved of the worst part was the ending.

This isn’t a movie it’s just some sitcom documentary of being with families on Christmas but even on those standards this is completely an atrocious mess the way it shows it’s message is so superficial and flat that it leaves no impact or lesson on Christmas in fact it actually makes us hate Christmas call it more like ruining Christmas the acting and dialogue what acting there isn’t any it’s just Kirk cameron having a random discussion it’s like being nosey o listening to a two person conversation that isn’t interesting it’s boring as hell this has about the same awfulness as the Nicolas cage film left behind because the connection between these is they both **** and Cameron was in a let behind adaptation before all left behind adaptations **** and saving Christmas Island is a real snooze fest 0 stars

Bay’s Netflix film with Ryan Reynolds is a very hard movie to review as it has a cool and interesting set up/premise but the actual plot/story almost doesnt make any sense because of how much confusing exposition there is there are some scenes that couldn have been removed or replaced with something better and this would have been an above average film. I don’t hate 6 underground and I don’t love it the thing that makes 6 underground appealing and having good qualities are the action set pieces and I’m not talking about because of them being fun but with how well choreographed they are ( bay knows how to stage action coherently ) and especially how creative they are with what’s going on within them ryan Reynolds and his team are driving a gorgeous looking green car in high spew while both chasing and being chased by criminals shooting they even come to collision with an orange car and they stop to easily defeat them bay comes up with a ton of creative ways of shooting destruction and demolition within the action like when cars crash into objects along with others rolling over, another including Flying pipes impaling badguys like in the opening scene and later we get the team flooding a building while doing other stuff like sniper shots and a lot of practical stunt work which looks dangerous in real life bay appeaerenly has a crew that can do the impossible. And oneof the more exciting action moments I saw was when Corey Hawkins charachter is shooting while riding a raft boat and I love how they shoot at each other. And I like how they are to stop a world class dictator and let the people have revenge on him at the end. Of course their is foul language with a lot of yellling and swearing ( someone should litteraly make a video that shows every yelling and swearing scene in this movie ) if you can look past that it’s not that stupid the movie itself though doesn’t have substance nor coherence within the plot or charachterisations which dissapointing because this movies charachters are all working together as one team and you should be rooting for them but they barely get much explanation the dialogue is also ludicrous at times like I don’t remember all of it but there is one where someone’s eye falls out and goes on the floor and Reynolds yells don’t you squish it you motherf$$$er and those sound Fitbit togeather the line makes no sense. Reynolds is likeable and at least tying to be a charasmatic funny guy but he can’t save the films weak script as a result 6 underground is typical mindless action movie and based on the consensus it has no thought and it’s hard to make sense out of but maybe there is a way to make sense out of all that is going on because though it does have fast pacing and edits you could have still been able to tell what was going on and unlike Armageddon it wasn’t trying to take itself as being an Oscar worthy action epic this was meant to entertain but due to the confusing plot lines it only entertains with the action I wanted to give this a higher rating like 6 (and considering how the number 6 is in the title ) if they put more effort into it but in the end I can only give this like a 5 and a half what a dumb movie but depending on your perspective maybe it’s the good kind of dumb but can only tell based on digging deep into it and seeing what others think and if it’s better than the transformers live action sequals.

I didn’t care much for this film in alll honesty I don’t like Rachel weisz she is probably one of the worst British actresses living today I can’t understand how she won an Oscar for this otherwise average film I can’t understand how see if others like and consider it good that’s fine but admit it’s not the best movie and that there are far better films and Rachel weisz is not meryl Streep nor Julia Roberts or Glenn close she’s a mediocre actress who doesn’t lead any influence or impact on us cinephiles. The thing that is worthy of this film is Ralph fiennes I really like that actor and he is the best thing about it I they really had To nominate this film for an acting Oscar why not just give it to Ralph Fiennes he is way better than Rachel weisz I love English patient and it’s thankful he made an Oscar comeback with the drama conclave he is a great actor he deserved a better female co star than rachel weisz sure this may be one of her best performances but I still will never consider her a high quality actress she is C- tier talent. This movie is a 5 for me

Bosh I didn’t feel much to this movie there are some interesting stuff to it but it’s also very confusing, and not making sense it didn’t feel like a film rather than just some education video of drugs whilei its not as bad as the mother or the fountain or Noah I still consider this second film from aronofsky mediocre. Seriously people it’s not that great and the charachters are flat and unlikeable especiallly Jared Leto oh I hated him in this he constantly throws fuss over nothing his chemistry with Jennifer Connolly is nonesexistent they can’t act and make a terrible on screen couple why Didn’t they just break up it makes no sense this is just dumb movie with charachters doing dumb things I felt disoriented much of the time and what really bothered me about this empty shell of a film is how the music and scenery repeats itself it’s so boring one of the most boring films in that regard. The only thing good about it outside of a few moments of interest is Ellen bursting and her performance she’s by far the best actor in this but she still plays some confused women hallucinating things that arent real like some refrigerator coming to life ( seriously what’s the meaning of that???!!!!! ) her performance may have been praise worthy but ive seen far better performances especially of 2000 ( the patriot , gladiator, traffic ) the best way I could describe this movie is like listening to the Beatles number 9 but in film form I was disoriented much of the time watching it at least in number 9 song along with other experimental/sound collage/avant garde songs were interesting in a way. Avant garde is better offf as music than film this type of movie is probably my least favorite film genre it can be interesting at times but not enough to make it a below average film in the end the only films I like from this director are black swan, pi and the wrestler but I still don’t consider either of those godfather level masterpieces requiem for a dream for me is a D+

[SPOILER ALERT: This review contains spoilers.]

Cutthroat island is a bland, generic, uninspired third rate rehash of all swashbuckler films before and brings nothing new to the genre (unlike the Disney franchise which did) the action was uninvolving and served no purpose, they were all random and felt unrealistic along with being fake, phony and poorly choreographed Renny Harlin sure cant direct action. Geena Davis is no Keira knightley, Mathew modine is no Orlando bloom. And the story is has no real adventure to it it’s all cliched and was done better before in better movies, the cinematography and production values are flat and lifeless and all look like they were cost on a minimal budget. The acting is mediocre at best and just terrible at worst. This is what you call a real cheese fest it’s corny as hell thanks to the dialogue And performances. It ends up being a forgettable film that you wont remember in less than a day.

Boring, stupid and uninspired just like the other transformers sequals in the end the only brainy and intelligent transformers is the first and bumblebee screw the rest because these cartoons feel like as if Sci fi and Disney channels had an ugly bastard child and made it into a bad music compilation disguised as a movie in the end the first bay live action film is my one and only favorite otherwise none of these movies are godfather nor citizen Kane rise of the beasts is junk

[SPOILER ALERT: This review contains spoilers.]

As a fan ofsome of bay’s work I must admit how dissapointing his first attempt at serious drama was there is so many cringe worthy scenes along with the fact that the charachters especially the fictional ones are so hollow you don’t feel interest or excitement in them it’s like bay was lazy while filming and that he woke up dead and not ready the only effort he puts is with filming the battle scenes which is the only thing exciting about this snooze fest and what’s most dissapointing is this film haas the look of an Oscar worthy drama epic but fails to reach its target and the fact this barely has the visual looks or trademark nor tone of a bay film you barely feel and easily forget that he made this what were you thinking man was this some passion project because it failed to deliver

This Was a stupid, cliched and uninspired re hash of classic westerns ( good bad ugly, high moon ) and sci fi films ( Independence Day, aliens, transformers ) and it all falls apart, Daniel Craig has no charisma In This western actor wannabe role he is no Clint Eastwood and is so unlikeable as the outlaw who we never get invested with. Harrison ford constantly groans as if just wants a paycheck is also bland in this mess he is no John Wayne. Olivia Wilde is just a bland and pointless useless charachter who just becomes a love interest with motivations that make no sense how Is she connected to extra terrestrial life what the??. I litteraly rooted for the aliens to just kill everyone specially Daniel Craig he was so unlikeable. The action was generic and bombastic it looked like the director was trying to be a poor man’s Michael bay. Even bay can make a better western than this drivel of mindless nonsense. The women in this are more bland and lifeless than the men i didn’t care for anyone being saved or dying. And I managed to saw this in theater and this connects to the movie battleship which came out one year later and that board game adaptation was far more plausible than cowboy and aliens if you want a good Independence Day wannabe watch battleship that one had better acting, more likeable charachters and a more interesting storyline yes I’d rather watch that silly board game film over this claptrap because cowboys and aliens is soo bad it’s good one of the best comedies and spoofs since spaceballs and mars attacks without the self awareness of those films. long story short cowboys and aliens is a stupid movie with bland Acting, and a senseless direction Jon favreu cant direct action to save his life and has none of the set piece skills of Michael bay or Roland emmerich and James Cameron he is the worst action director alive today and this movie proves it

Seriously battleship ( which in disguise feels like it was actually directed by Michael bay due to bright color visuals and loud explosions ) is not a bad movie it has memorable scenes and is gennnerally a piece of entertainment that doesn’t require much thinking or thought, it’s visually stunning and beautiful to look at snd the climax was just spectacular it was visually coherent and unlike most of those transformers films the human charachters were better fleshed out and they were at least relatable and had charisma like Taylor kitsch who looks well fit in the role he gives a solid performance as the protagonist, the storytelling is solid even if basic its overall an awesome popcorn film that is rewatchable an i have watched it several times since its release both on tv and streaming services. It’s decent enough to be worth praise and cinemetic consideration I would watch it sometimes on a rainy day weekend for entertainment I give it a 9 on an enjoyment scale but as overall quality it’s a 7/10

[SPOILER ALERT: This review contains spoilers.]

What a load of crap, avoid if you want good entertainment because this lifeless, dull and predictable remake **** the joy out of disaster scenes with an unsatisfactory climax and wooden charachters along with poor CGI and unspecial effects like the ship looking like a giant plastic bath toy boat and the water in the sea looking unnatural and stupid this Poseidon can burn in hell and Wolfgang Peterson can Rest in pain because you ought to be ashamed for ruining your career with this cinemetic travesty

Truly one of the worst and most souless and lifeless pieces of garbage of the past decade a over bloated waterlogged turkey that is equally slow, gloomy, nauseating, clunky, clumsy and worst of all boring as hell. Schlockmeister darren aronofsky responsible for art house drek such as the fountain, mother and requiem for a dream is a must avoid for every film fan. This movie is one of the biggest crimes ever committed to cinema and everyone responsible for it should be banned from filmmaking. The CGI especially that of the animals looked like plastic figurines like the ones they used to sell from toys r us. The acting is godawful everyone doesn’t seem to be trying with Russell Crowe sleepwalking in the film to ray winstone just yelling and groaning like a drunken dwarf. None of these book based charachters are likeable and especially the sons were awful douglas booth is the worst actor in this entire mess and Logan lerman ( his second time playing a son of the main charachter the other being the far more compelling masterpiece the patriot ) just acts like a stereotypical disagreeing son who just argues with his father all the time. Speaking of Noah’s charachter himself oh my god who had the idea to write him to be anA$$hole who attempts to murder his daughters this was not in the book at all and if I were god myself I would just let Noah get drowned in the flood. This movie is to quote the cattle decapitation song apex blasphemy at its most blasphemous an insult to all religious people this being one of the other equally godawful Christian movie abominations left behind, gods not dead and saving Christmas reprresents the worst in filmmaking and screenwriting, who wrote this screenplay anyway some homeless person who thought he wanted to insult the audiences intelligence by making a Bible protagonist a killer?Whoever wrote it deserves to be fired and never be involved with film ever again because Noah is one of the worst movies of this century along with the last airbender, fant4stick, alone in the dark, battlefield earth, birdemic, dragonball evolution, bloodrayne, Freddy got fingered, the happening and disaster movie PS shame on Patti smith for that depressingly awful end credits song 0/100

How does this have more positive than negative critic reviews is beyond me there is nothing creepy or scary about this piece of trash may as well saw better suspense in the mindless chuck norris action veichle invasion USA as a better invasion horror remake than the daniel Craig/nicole Kidman remake version which **** big Time Daniel Craig can’t act worth crap and proves once more why he is the worst bond actor of All time I don’t get any of the praise given to him he is so unlikeable in this movie as are all the other Zombified beings this is a perfect movie to show what phoned in acting is and it’s the happening level predictable the best part was the car on fire whip that alone can’t even save it from being the worst movie ever avoid

Craptastic bore is more like it this is the worst superhero film I have ever seen it’s boring dull and lifeless the four barely interact with each other and the final battle is just anti climactic the villains design looked stupid, the cinematography, effects and production were bland and unpleasant to Look at I was aggressively bored the whole time and wanted to fall asleep this movie was a snooze fest from start to finish just don’t bother watching it unless you want to take a nap

From quality meister Steven Spielberg comes a compelling war epic full of profound performances and a powerful sense of storytelling, the battle scenes are exciting and realistic and you can sense the tension and care put into it the charachters were memorable and you cared for every single one of them this is the best war movie ever and anyone who doesn’t like it has a problem and knows nothing of quality cinema because this film is above the top tier a true masterpiece!!!!! 10/10

I thought This was a thought provoking and relaxing black comedy that had a profound message and charismatic performances it was like a scorsese film with a Touch of cohen brothers and Steven soderberg it’s smart, elegant and intelligent and filled with humor that is the equivalent of that in family guy it’s just perfect this is easily my favorite performance from Dwayne Johnson and it’s still confusing how he and Michael bay didn’t get Oscar’s for this 2013 masterpiece everything with its humor and violence is useful and done intentionally and understands restraint at the end of the day I felt more smarter than ever watching it and my soul grew refreshed another one of my top ten films of the decade

Now this is what you call a perfect modern day war epic, from the outstanding performances to the string charachter development and narrative 13 hours is a powerful film with well written dialogue, charachters we are invested with And a sense of history lesson in how they tried to defend their country and families it’s just heartwarming and Michael bay gives us enough drama tension to resonate within the film he isn’t just relying on explosions and unlike Pearl Harbor he managed to stay faithful to the source material and make something historically accurate and honoring to its events it’s truly a wonderful film that deserves every ounce of respect and admiration it’s bay’s second best movie

This second film from Michael bay is his bestband most restrained and thoughtful effort the plot manages to be plausible and making sense and the dialogue is stellar, the performances from top to bottom are first class Sean Connery deserved an Oscar nom for this and Nicolas cage, Ed Harris John Spencer and the rest of the cast are also phenomenal, I cared for everyone in it the action scenes were intelligent and filmed in a way that’s smart and intelligent there was logic to it. It brings something new to the action genre with original charachters that are not cliched and have a strong and compelling personality, you can get invested with what their intentions are and why they are doing it. Just like you want from a Michael bay film the story is very interesting and well written. The direction was astonishing this is high quality filmmaking at its finest better than speed or face off this makes those two films look mediocre in comparison. The rock is just as intelligent an action film as terminator 2, robocop and raiders of the lost ark. It’s easy to comprehend what’s going on within the adventure of it. The final battle was so exciting and the ending was just heartwarming and as it’s dedicated to the late Partner of Jerry bruckheimer don simpson as they made five awesome and mind blowing blockbuster epics and this final collaboration of them along with crimson tide is there best one a work of art and cinemetic perfection and excellence this is a film every film fan must see I give it a perfect 10/10

To put it simple bad boys is the best 90sbuddy comedy film I have ever seen it’s very refreshing and original we have never seen a buddy comedy with two black guys as well as the plot of helping a witness stop a criminal gang. The visual style is elegant and this being Michael bay first film he manages to be restraint and never go overboard excessive, the action chases remind me of that in Indiana jones. The dynamic between smith and Lawrence is fantastic they give stellar performances as the two cops who understand their motives and this movies charachters are compelling and entertaining to the max I was never bored a single time. Seriously this movie deserves a high critics rating it’s an excellent film way better than that I was also satisfied by its climax and this film had little special effects which is odd for a blockbuster as a result it has more substance than needed and though his films have explosions that is not all they are there is involving plot lines and narrative especially when there are no action going on screen it’s interesting and that is when you put thought into the drama of the film bad boys is more than your average action film it has intelligence and doesn’t go over the top with its dumb fun values as it’s dumb fun done right this is the film that began the careers of two cinemetic movie legends Will smith and Michael bay and it works on every level 10/10

One of the most thoughtful, intelligent action sci fi films ever seen The charachters are compelling and have motives and the direction is elegantly smooth and neat and it’s never sickening to watch Michael bay knows limits and restraint with action and manages to creat tension and meaning to it the storytelling is involving as well thanks to thr Stellar script from orci and kurtsman they really know how to get deep into storytelling and the cinematography is just astonishing easily one of the better and more thoughtful action films of the last few decades A