Apparently the film was produced by Lewis Hamilton who is a famous half-black driver ( his mother is white ) and apparently the ONLY 'black' driver in F1 history - They really should've just made a biopic of his story because this was absolute garbage. 61 year old Brad Pitt swans through the movie with perfect hair and enough filler in his face to float a small sea vessel and the script is easily one of the dumbest things you'll find yourself subjected to this side of 'Barbie The Movie.' I'll give it 1 star for the car racing footage.
When Harry Stabbed Sally - This feels like a badly written, woke tv show. The main characters were badly miscast and have absolutely no charisma. The humour doesn't hit and the deaths are lame. This whole thing is just... dumb. - 1 star for the orgasmic hippies at the drive-in
Disappoints in the third act after a strong start. There's a lot of girl bossing going on with a Mary Sue final Girl and a plot twist that robs the film of its fun original concept - 4 stars
Much better than Late Night with the Devil, this is a great horror film that actually delivers with the horror. Sydney Sweeney is solid as are the supporting cast, script and direction - and the whole thing doesn't overstay its welcome. Trust me, the ending alone is worth the popcorn money - 10 stars!
Surprisingly enjoyable family film with a real life story about a man connecting with a stray dog - shame they had to tick those diversity boxes and swap out his real team ( who all happened to be white ) and make them diverse and inclusive to get all that groovy ESG action. They cunningly made sure not to include any real photos of his team during the closing credits hoping the audience wouldn't notice - how sad.
Looking forward to seeing this as the reviews were glowing and I'd heard it was very clever and bravely counter-culture. Sadly it's a very average, low budget film that ironically succeeds because it's a black film about a lacklustre product succeeding because it's a black product. Well, there you go - 3 stars
A real miss for Ridley Scott, some great battle scenes and beautifully recreated set design and costumes are not enough to save this odd and inauthentic retelling of Napoleon's life. Aside from the famous half Haitian General there is some stupid DEI going on here that undermines the true population of France, especially in the coronation scene ( I know there are boxes that need to be ticked nowadays for various reasons but still! ) I also noticed some black soldiers in Wellington's British army which is REALLY baffling. Sadly, these are nothing compared to the outrageous liberties taken with the most successful war tactician in history and his relationship with Josephine. In summary - I would say this is close to being Ridley Scott's Waterloo, and if he doesn't start improving soon, maybe he needs to spend some Time on St Helena to reflect on his career - 4 stars
Taylor Swift has tapped into a VERY lucrative demographic evidenced by the massive cult-like crowd that was enthralled by her every move, utterance and hair toss. The audience, iPhones in hand, swaying in time to every song is a little disturbing. They don't just love her, they LOVE her! I have no doubt these followers would do literally anything to appease their messiah's every whim. And I mean anything. Fascinating to observe, even, if like me, you're not a fan of her brand of simple folk/pop music and noncommittal dancing - but at 3 hours long you might have wanted a swifter show - 5 stars
I suppose if you're a fan of Beyonce you'll likely give 'Renaissance: A Film by Beyonce' a great score. If however, like me, you found Beyonce's 'Renaissance: A Film by Beyonce' overrated, self-serving and a little facile then you'd probably want to give Beyonce's 'Renaissance A Film by Beyonce' - 2 stars.
Surprisingly charming and funny film given its source material. The two leads are well cast and have great chemistry together. Emilia Jones is a standout and I look forward to seeing her in more films. Yes, the end does jump the shark - but not enough to ruin all the prior great work. I dunno, this film and its performances really clicked with me - 10 stars
Disney needs to give this whole 'Marvel thing' a miss for a while, it's become tiresome and boring. Here's an idea, make something entertaining for the whole family to enjoy - 3 stars
Dull and not very good, the cast is woke and wacky and the script is plain dumb. Also, it's just not very scary, could've been Alien on a 1800s tall ship but what we got was a boring vampire slog with all the progressive agenda boxes ticked - 2 stars
The first half was pretty strong with a few good laughs here and there but the second half... just wasn't funny, or entertaining. It was a disappointment at the box office and I can see why. The main protagonists in the film also had a problem with 'white people.' - I think we can do a little better than this sadly reductive and crass terminology when referring to different races and cultures. look, It's a passable way to kill an hour or so, but don't expect the chuckle-fest all the pandering reviewers promised - 4 stars
Ignore the useless Rotten Tomatoes reviewers who fawn over all the Disney/Marvel garbage. This is a gritty and pulpy grindhouse movie that recalls great revenge films like The Hills Have Eyes and I Spit on You're Grave. Yes, it's a Violent film dealing with a dark cult that kidnaps young girls which may be too much for some viewers. Great performances from Maika Monroe and Nikolaj Coster-Waldau insured I stuck around to the very bloody end - 10 stars
This is a spinoff spider-man film about a black spider-man who journeys through many multi-verses ( the spider-verse ) to interact with other non Spider-man Spider-men/ women. The animation gets irksome on the eyes, there's more of the usual progressive nonsense and it also annoyingly sets up another creatively bankrupt and pointless film - 1 star
To be Clear, the only Ghost Face is Courteney Cox, easily the scariest part of this film. Everything else is distilled awfulness. The entire cast are completely unlikeable, including the embarrassing ' Core Four?? ' - I wanted them all to die horrible and slow stabby deaths. The script is an insult to anyone over the age of three and... look, it's bottom shelf slop. If you wanna see a REAL horror film then go see Terrifier 2 but just stay away from this abysmal joke - 1 star because there was some decent gore
Interesting premise and fun first act - but then it proceeds to mindlessly travel so far up its own posterior that Everything Everywhere All At Once explodes into an energetic dense cloud of nothingness. Once finished, all you're left with is an irritating headache and a deep sadness for the time you've lost to this celluloid **** - 3 stars
With so many dumb Hollywood movies getting 10s I feel this one ACTUALLY deserves it. Knock-out performance by Andrea Riseborough and easily the best thing Mark Maron's ever done, this is one of the best films of the year. Yes, the ending's convenient but you really won't mind because it does that thing films used to do - entertain while telling a real human story - 10 stars
Extremely well made film based on the classic novel and made previously into excellent films also. Sadly, the cast seems to be made up entirely of Germans? With NO diversity at all??? Apart from this appalling oversight the movie is a must watch - 9 stars
Started off interestingly, but the further it got the more convoluted and irksome it became until I just wanted to escape into a good nap - 3 stars for Kate Hudson in a bikini
It's fine, but not nearly as funny or clever as the preceding Shrek films. The main characters were more cutesy than funny, the art style while vibrant, didn't fully work for me and I found the film became rather tiresome around the 1hr mark - 6 cat lives out of 10
I've come to realise that Apple and Disney hate me, they seemingly go out of their way to create these ugly abominations that are almost anti-entertainment. No... they ARE anti-entertainment, they're devoid of any kind of originality, any kind of humanity - they're just a big pile of hollow and joyless excrement - 1 star, and I'm being generous because it's Christmas.
A shallow, mawkish film with paper thin characters that inhabit a disturbingly diverse 1957 London & Paris. I'd hoped this may have been similar to the charming Shirley Valentine (1989) but alas, this is an empty, flaccid reminder of how good British films used to be - 2 stars
Another disappointing Hulu/ Disney reimagining of a classic film that feels bland and hollow. The writing's just not good and reduces Clive Barker's grimy and sinfully dark tale into something that feels sanitised and safe. The Cenobites look like they're in rubber suits and the Lemarchand's box lore has been reduced to another lazy slasher flick totally ignoring the rules from the book 'The Hellbound Heart.' 3 stars - for the stunning and brave casting of the first transgender Pinhead!
The first 45 minutes moves along quite nicely with a few laughs here and there BUT after that it becomes pretty tedious and awful with Billy Eichner becoming more and more unbearable as the movie makes its way to its unromantic and non-comedic ending. Not a bad gay film, just a bad film - 3 stars
I feel the NEED! The NEED for a better sequel! - After hearing all the rave reviews I must admit to being a little bewildered, this is one of the dumbest films I've ever seen?! Just because it's not woke doesn't mean it's good. The script and acting are both nearly as terrible as Tom's hair dye. They should make a Top Gun Three-Some and bring back Meg Ryan and Kelly McGillis - 5 stars for the admittedly great flying footage that for some reason reminded me of Star Wars?
Native American Wonder Woman Vs a funny man in a cheap alien Predator suit - Ignore the good reviews, this is a laughably bad TV movie with little in the way of scares or suspense or good acting or authenticity. They should've canceled this alongside Batgirl - 1 star for the French idiots
Fun and edgy teen comedy reminiscent of the 80s and 90s. Some genuine laughs here and a scene stealing performance from Miles J. Harvey make this an easy recommend for anyone having a few beers on a Saturday night - 8 stars
With SO much utter garbage out there in film-land nowadays this movie has to be a ten, it's everything I love about good cinema. If you haven't seen it see it, and if you have seen it see it again! - 10 Fat Bernies
This easily surpasses the other two films and is wildly entertaining from beginning to end. Unburdened of the usual woke agenda this film is furiously fun and has some of the best action scenes I've seen in a long time - ignore all the whiny snowflakes, this is a good time! - 10 stars
Interesting take on the well known French play. Dinklage is strong, as always, but the diverse casting and woke tropes simply take the viewer out of the time-period and remind them of today's silly political agendas - 3 stars
Don't go down the rabbit hole! The Matrix franchise should NOT have been resurrected, this feels like a bad TV movie with none of the magic that made the original such a cool landmark film. Bad acting, awful never-ending exposition and second rate special effects come together to truly underwhelm - 1 red pill out of 10
Silent Night is a black comedy without the comedy, there's some satire in here too but it's quite frankly stupid. This is a Christmas film that doesn't aim very high but manages to fall waaaaaay below the bar - 3 Xmas stars
I'm a **** for a good western and this one delivers, Tim Blake Nelson absolutely steals the show but Stephen Dorff is excellent and could be his best performance. My only small issue is Gavin Lewis as the son, he was miscast and it hurts the authenticity value of this otherwise great film - 9 stars
The cranky, craggy bond is back and thankfully it's his final outing as 007 in this exceedingly dull and pointlessly convoluted Bond entry - 4 nanobots out of 10
The Harder They Fall could've been a fascinating look at the real life black cowboys of the wild west, instead we get a silly MTV inspired cartoon - 3 stars for the historical stuff it's based on.
Even with the diversity casting agenda fully at play here (as most Hollywood movies are nowadays) this is a visually stunning film that fully transports you into its intergalactic spice-trading universe. Shame that it's only part one with part two probably a good two years away at best - 7 stars
Halloween kills doesn't feel like a Halloween film, it seems odd to say a slasher flick lacks heart and soul, but this slasher flick lacks heart and soul - 4 stars for some admittedly fun gruesome deaths.
Laughably bad futuristic noir with Hugh Jackman wading through a flooded Miami and a muddled script to deliver one of the biggest turkeys of the year - 1 star for the bizarre sex scene involving Hugh splaying himself out on a chair in a wacky tribute to Flashdance.
When it isn't beating you over the head with its preachy and reductive politics it's underwhelming you with its lack of action or horror. Go watch the much better 2006 The Hills Have Eyes instead - 2 stars
A children's after school special has more edge than this tame CGI monster flick, I would've given it a higher score if Kong had've eaten the irritating little girl - 3 stars
