I am not done with you Ubisoft. This game was also available on XSX for free, so that entitles me to review this game again. And to think that I originally gave this game a 4 just because I was looking for an excuse to give a game higher than a 0. Well now there's no point in doing that since the mods want to delete my reviews, and that's what I want to address. Don't expect any white lies from me, so let me give you mods a glimpse of what I will be scoring games for the remainder of the year. Every game this year is in danger of receiving a negative score from me if they make the same mistakes as last year. As for mixed scores, these developers make it nearly impossible for me to give them even that. ● As for positive scores, I flat out refuse to hand out positives like candy. If a dev wants a positive score from me, then they better make a game I truly enjoy and the price better be right. Only 12 games out of hundreds have ever received a positive score from me, only 3 of them were full-priced, none were $70. 2 of them were online-only and they were both free. No singleplayer only game has ever received a positive score from me, regardless of price. So that should give you the odds of what games, if any, will receive a positive score from me in the future. Do you really think I be like "Man, I totally bought this game just to hate on it" no, these devs make it difficult for me to like anything, to the point where I have to hand out a bunch of zeros. Stop charging me full-price for just half the game, especially at $70. Stop charging me full-price for indie games. Stop giving me barebones content at full price. Stop releasing unfinished and broken games. Stop cutting too many corners and then have the audacity to slap a AAA price tag to your game. Bottom line, stop being so greedy and lazy. ● And it's not like the future is looking so bright either. Naughty Dog and CDPR were once considered to be the "best developers ever" by a bunch of nerdy toy-collecting millennials. That aged like milk. Both studios promised an online multiplayer mode for TLOU2 and Cyberpunk respectively, and they both tapped out to that multiplayer. TLOU Online was clearly supposed to be a fundraiser for Naughty Dog's future projects, so I was wondering how the hell they were going to fund their next AAA game after TLOU Online was cancelled. And I can't believe it, ND are using sponsors to fund Interwokelactic. And the fact that there's 2 sponsors in the reveal trailer alone (and it's not even a sports game) is literal proof that TLOU2 failed to be profitable. And nobody wants to play as an ugly bald woman, God you're so out of touch Naughty Dog. At least ND are confident enough to showcase their in-game graphics. The Witcher 4 trailer is all CGI. That's a big red flag, and of course Ciri is ugly now. ● Developers these days are so greedy and lazy and out of touch. All I want from my AAA games is for them to have the quality aspects that were once the norm in the PS3 era, but just updated to PS5 standards. That's literally it, I'm not asking for much. But lazy devs these days want to cut corners by removing multiplayer, giving me mobile game graphics, less content and what not. And they want to increase the price to $70 and now $80? How is any of that my fault? At those outrageous prices, I expect top-notch AAA quality. If devs can't deliver on that, then stop with the insane prices. You mods got to let us say whatever the hell we want. Because sometimes we can see things that critics and toy-collecting millennials can't see, and that's the whole point of user reviews. I hated CDPR and Naughty Dog before anyone else did, and they eventually got hated for the same reasons I hated them. I didn't have a Metacritic account when TLOU1 and Witcher 3 came out nor do I got proof that I was the first to hate them, but just wait until people hate on Larian and you'll see exactly what I mean. ● P.S. It's my way or the highway, Metacritic.
This game is still an absolute huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers have the audacity to charge $50 for a game that still has no multiplayer. Before I rip this game a new one, I think it's important to point out TLOU2 does have things that you would expect in a AAA game, like high quality graphics, highly detailed animations, real-time mechanics and just good attention to detail. You compare this to the SH2 remake, clearly TLOU2 is way ahead. But the story was so freaking bad, it completely overshadowed everything else, hence why I didn't mention the quality aspects in my initial review of TLOU2. Now, I didn't hate the story because of a specific scene (they already spoiled that in the reveal trailer for God's sake). I hated the story because it ticks all the boxes of stuff I hate in storytelling. It's extremely arty farty, cringeworthy, filled with plotholes, SJW bullcrap, too many flashbacks and a bunch of other things. I could go on and on, but bottom line, this is easily the worst story I have ever seen in a game. And this is coming from someone who doesn't really care much for story in video games. ● So that's enough to give it a 0. And I know what you're thinking "it's gameplay over story" and I agree. Hell, I can live with a game having a bad story, but this is Birdemic levels of bad. I'll put it this way, let's say you're dating a hot woman. But then you discover something incredibly weird and disturbing about her, to the point where you never want to see her again. That's how I feel about TLOU2. Except there's no hot women in TLOU2 but I digress. The gameplay is trash anyways, just for the simple fact that there isn't a true striking system. Your melee weapon acts as a magnet when striking, so it's basically the same as the grappling system. This system is awful on Grounded difficulty, since the AI's grappling range is ridiculously high. You can be like 7 feet away from an enemy and that's enough for them to magically grab onto you like a magnet. The AI is painfully stupid, even on Grounded. ● Best way to describe Naughty Dog is one step forward and two steps back. While this game does have impressive details and animations, it also fails to add very basic details. The fire doesn't spread through vegetation, trash cans do not react to your weapons nor can I get the lid to open, the stumbling animations on sloping terrain are buggy when doing melee attacks. These are basic details that PS3 games can get right. I can make plenty more examples, but you're lucky there's a character limit Naughty Dog. And all of these details sacrificed for what? Dismemberment physics that allow you to shoot someone's arm off like if it were a mannequin? And while the cord physics are impressive at first, it eventually transforms into spaghetti physics and clip through your entire torso. Don't get me wrong, this game does have amazing details, like with the glass, snow, stains and stuff like that. But then again, there's no multiplayer. So I'm not that impressed with these details when lazy devs only worked on half the game. 5 years into this generation and Naughty Dog still hasn't figured out how to do ray-tracing. ● As I mentioned earlier, there's no multiplayer despite Naughty Dog promising one. And I can't believe that their fanboys actually believe their bullcrap statement on why they cancelled the online. ND said it was too ambitious and it would require them to become a live-service studio, thus impacting their singleplayer titles. Oh please Naughty Dog, you've been in the industry for how long? And you're just realizing this? No, tell them the real reason why. It's because you're too greedy to hire developers who could pull off multiplayer, and your current developers are lazy and incompetent to do the job. And just to prove my point, why didn't you include co-op in the No Return mode? Oh yeah, I'm sure that definitely takes a lot of resources to make. The truth is you can't pull off multiplayer anymore. No Return is very buggy, it's almost like I'm playing an online game. So just imagine if that mode were to have another player, it would've been a broken mess. That explains why they cancelled TLOU Online, because it would've been beyond broken and a hassle to fix. I don't recommend this game at all. ● P.S. My way or the highway, Metacritic.
And speaking of XDefiant shutting down, that reminds me, I will have to change the score from a 6 to a 4 for this game. Instead of editing my old review, I'll delete it and write a new one due to how buggy Metacritic is. When I had orginally reviewed Multiversus back in like 2022, I did so assuming that the game had P2P servers, because it's a no-brainer to use it for a game like this. With that in mind, I gave it a 6. But if I had known this game was using dedicated servers, then I would have never given it a 6 in the first place. Why the hell did you idiotic devs use dedicated servers when P2P is a lot cheaper? Don't get me wrong, I hate when developers are a bunch of cheapskates. But if there's one thing I hate more than cheapskates, it's developers wasting so much money just to please a bunch of nerds. Nobody's asking for dedicated servers but toy-collecting millennials. Why the hell you did that? You never listen to nerds, because they're never consistent. ● Just to be clear, I am not upset that this game is shutting down. I didn't spend any money on this and I got bored of it anyway, so whatever. It's the fact that these developers wasted money on dedicated servers, when nobody cares about it other than neckbeards. And the problem with dedicated servers is that games shut down quicker because of server costs. There are free-to-play games that are way less popular than MultiVersus that are still playable online, like 3on3 FreeStyle. Blacklight Retribution was another game that was less popular than MultiVersus, and that lasted for over a decade on PS4 before it got delisted. And I was hoping this would be one of those games, hence my original score. But nope, they had to use dedicated servers and shut it down quickly. My point is I can't tell the difference between P2P and dedicated servers. This game had stability and lag issues, which is why I thought it was P2P. So what's the difference? They wasted money on dedicated servers for absolutely no reason, and I'm supposed to feel sorry for their layoffs? You should've used P2P servers, stupid, especially when Smash uses P2P. ● I'm going to have change the rules on how I approach online gaming. If your game has dedicated servers, I will dock 1-2 points, depending on the circumstances. If you don't want me to dock any points, you better have a good excuse as to why you are using dedicated servers. If it's over 20 players, maybe you're excused but I'll have look into that. But if it's 20 or less, then it better be P2P, because I know for a fact that 20 players works just fine with P2P. Because there's literally no difference between dedicated and P2P servers. The same flaws that plague P2P servers also afflict dedicated servers. So might as well go with the cheaper option, and toy-collecting nerds had nothing to say about Helldivers 2 having P2P servers, so you're literally pleasing no one with dedicated servers. One of the main things I praised about this game was that it was free when Nintendo would charge $60 for this. I also said it was fun beating up Tom, or watching Bugs lose and stuff like that. So whatever, I'll give you credit for that, and I appreciate the offline mode. But it's wild that I'm technically reviewing a game the same year it will go offline, so I'll have to take away another point. 3 it is.
I am not done with you Ubisoft. This game was also available for free on PC, so that entitles me to review this game one more time. Now, I am not upset that the game is shutting down. When a game is online only, that means the developers could shut it down at any moment and therefore becoming unplayable, I know the consequences. I didn't spend a single penny on this game and I was bored of this trash anyways, so the game shutting down is no skin off my nose. But this game is getting shut down way too early. There's a bunch of no-name, free-to-play online games that lasted way longer than this trash. Ubisoft has enough money to keep this garbage going for at least 5 years. When BO6 came out, it took like a month for Ubisoft to announce the shut down of XDefiant. They refused to give refunds to those who bought MTX in the last 30 days, which coincides with the launch of BO6. So now it's apparent that this game was planned to shut down when the greedy devs stop making money, and BO6 caused that. There was never any intention to keep this game going, they just wanted to take the money and run. ● And I should've known that the greedy devs wanted to do this in the first place. That explains why they didn't release the game on Steam or any other third-party platform, because they planned to kill this game once they got the money they wanted. Well at least I know what to keep in mind next time. If an online game is only in the publisher's website and not on Steam or Epic Games Store, then they have no intention to keep the game alive once they lose some steam, no pun intended. Because I don't see any other reason to kill this game off instantly, unless they were using dedictated servers. Well I thought this game was using P2P servers, because of how bad the netcode was. If this game does indeed use dedicated servers, well that just proves how pointless they are. Might as well go with P2P because whatever problems exist within P2P servers are also present in dedicated servers. This game is 6v6, it doesn't need dedicated servers. Who the hell asked for dedicated servers other than toy-collecting millennials? I cannot tell the difference between P2P and dedicated servers, so don't you dare waste money on something that only nerds ask for.
I am not done with you 2K. I originally got the PS4 version of this game that came with the PS5 upgrade, so that entitles me to review this game one more time. This garbage is the same game as the last. The developers tried advertising gimmicky crap like intergender matches as new features. Oh yeah, I'm sure it takes loads of work to change a single line of code for intergender matches. And it's not even a new feature, this has been a thing since the 90s, but for whatever reason WWE got rid of intergender matches at some point, even though it's just a fake video game about a fake sport. Speaking of fake sports, WWE needs to stop catering to the nerds with this "great wrestling skills" bullcrap. Why the hell would I want to watch fake fights when I can watch real ones in the UFC? You need to focus more on the drama and personalities, not that flippy midget bullcrap. Remember when nerds got angry because Goldberg beat up some fat guys for a fake belt? We need more of that. The more these wrestling nerds hate something, the better chance you have at gaining viewers, thank me later. Those nerds are addicted to wrestling, they'll watch no matter what. ● But whatever, I'm done with this stupid company. How dare you appeal to neckbeards by giving the belt to Joe Burrow cosplaying as Max Headroom. But if I'm going to quit buying WWE games, I'd like to quit in style. There's a statement that the WWE made several years back and they don't even have a reliable source to back it up. I'm not saying you're lying WWE, but just understand that you need to provide a reliable source for every bold statement you make. Because your very own fanbase has accused you of lying on many occasions. Knowing that, why should I take that statement you made several years back at face value? The source is literally "trust me bro" and that's not good enough for me, I want a source and I want it now. What am I talking about? I'm not going into detail, but don't play dumb with me WWE, you know exactly what I'm talking about. No one else is going to question you on this, because appeal to emotion is all you need to convince the masses, so I'll take this opportunity to ask you myself. Tell you what, if you provide me with a source, I'll keep buying WWE games. But if you fail to do that, then the next WWE game will be my last.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $70 for the exact same game as the last. There's no gameplay improvements, To be honest, I just hate wrestling at this point. First Fox and now Netflix, why are these big networks becoming a charity to WWE? Just keep it off my entertainment already. Wrestling used to be a part of pop culture to some degree, but now it has turned into a niche product for nerds. So why would I buy this game? That's the thing, I wouldn't. It was one of the monthly games for PS Plus, so I might as well try it out. The only reason to get these games is for the old school wrestlers and the created ones by the community. And who doesn't like to do celebrity Royal Rumbles. Speaking of which, why the hell isn't there a 50-man Royal Rumble yet? How can there be one in real life but not in a fake video game? Well I mean wrestling is fake, but you know what I mean. At this point, we should have up to 10 wrestlers in 1 ring. 2K needs to drop the PS4 version already, so we can get a true "next-gen" experience. The Universe mode was garbage and it's full of bugs and glitches. The hair physics are trash. ● Brock Lesnar, Vince McMahon and Goldberg are missing, making this roster weaker than the previous game. And yeah, I'm aware of the Vince and Lesnar allegations, but if you devs want to cancel them for that, then why didn't you remove Lesnar from the showcase? Speaking of the showcase, it's called "40 years of Wrestlemania" implying that there's at least 1 match for every Wrestlemania, but there's only 21 matches. It's not like these lazy devs had to do much work anyway, it's just objectives and archival footage. I'm unfamiliar with the matches after Wrestlemania 31, and funny enough that was the last time most of my friends stopped talking about WWE on social media, so it's safe to say that wrestling became irrelevant afterwards. And after playing the next WM matches, I can see why. They had the women main event WM. Are you freaking kidding me? To make matters worse, they had John Cena lose to a fat guy in a clown mask with Lil Wayne dreadlocks and Ace Ventura pants. Apparently Steve Austin hadn't wrestled in 19 years. You'd think his return match would be special, but it was against another no-name fatso. This is all ridiculous, no wonder WWE lost a lot of fans. ● The online multiplayer is complete trash. It's full of bugs, glitches, disconnects and lag. I'm late to this game, but was it always like this? I feel like these greedy developers are tampering with the servers in a pathetic attempt to get players to buy the deluxe editions of WWE 2K25 for that 7-day early access. Rhea Ripley and Bianca Belair have higher ratings than Hulk Hogan. I keep seeing wrestling fans in the internet say stuff like "we're in a wrestling boom" no we freaking aren't, you nerds always say that crap when you get what you want. Hulkamania and nWo, now those were actual boom periods. Hulk Hogan was the wrestler responsible for those booms. So you liberal devs got to stop disrespecting Hulk Hogan with those garbage feminist ratings. He is like the Pele of wrestling, put some respect on Hogan's name, brother. I don't recommend this game at all.
I am not done with you 2K. The PS4 version of this game was also included on PS Plus, so that entitles me to review this game one more time. The frame rate is worse and it's filled with even more bugs and glitches. I already reviewed this garbage, so why don't I talk about wrestling instead. I don't watch it anymore, but for some reason the algorithm on social media keeps bombarding me with this fake crap. So I'm still slightly aware of the current events of WWE, like Cena turning heel. I hate what wrestling has become, I only see a bunch of nerds and losers talking about this. And it's all thanks to CM Punk, because that liberal with the yellow teeth kept advocating for a bunch of no-name midgets with "great wrestling skills" to become top stars. Dude, nobody cares if you have great wrestling skills or not, because it's fake. And nowadays, you have no-name wrestlers beating the likes of John Cena and Randy Orton. They are like the Messi and Ronaldo of WWE, let goats be goats, because that's what the "normies" want. Just look at WWE's most popular videos on YouTube, it's literally a bunch of goats that "can't wrestle." ● "We're in a wresting boom" that's bullcrap but if you nerds want to believe that, guess who was the star during that period? Roman Reigns, the guy that used to get the COD/Fortnite treatment by nerds. Oh, now you like him. You see, point proven. You never cater to the nerds, just let goats be goats. None of that "putting over young talent" bullcrap (whatever the hell that means). But no, they had to give Howard the Duck the world championship. But whatever, I'll never watch wrestling again anyways. But when Netflix punishes WWE for low viewership numbers, I want you devs to see that as an example that you should never listen to nerds. So the next time you devs make a high-budget AAA game, only appeal to a casual audience. Because eventually the nerds are going to give in to whatever's popular, just like they gave in to Roman Reigns. Remember, these nerds on the internet are the vocal minority and they don't know what they want. ● P.S. Again Metacritic, my way or the highway with these reviews.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't this game called Alan Wake 2? Then why in God's name am I playing as some FBI agent for the majority of the time. This would be the equivalent of playing a Max Payne game, but you get to play as some other stupid character for the majority of the game rather than Max Payne himself. Speaking of Max Payne, he is very annoying in this game. I can't believe Alan Wake is the deuteragonist of his own game, all because of a freaking agenda. I guess they misspelled Alan Woke 2. And before anyone dare accuse me of anything, I don't care who you play as. My point is we should be playing as the protagonist for the majority of the time, especially when it's named after him. Just like Larian, the greedy developers are joining the greedy trend of charging PS5 owners an extra $10 for absolutely no reason. It's $50 on PC. ● The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The physics are beyond horrible. There is barely any shooting, it's a walking simulator. Not to mention the shooting mechanics are terrible. The puzzles are a joke. The story is trash. I'm surprised you can open the doors in real-time, seeing how recent full-priced games don't even allow me do that; I'm looking at you Baldur's Gate 3 and Starfield. But just like Spider-Man 2, you can't even open the drawers in real-time. Are you freaking kidding? Joel actually open drawers with his hand in PS3 TLOU, yet they magically open themselves in this PS5 $60 game. That's embarrassing. Due to the dark and gritty nature of this game, surely there couldn't be a cringier moment than Mario Wonder's musical garbage, right? Wrong, there is a moment in this game that is extremely cringeworthy. I won't spoil it, but if you played this game, you know exactly what I'm talking about. There is a lack of enemy variety. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $60 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. The developers were too cheap and lazy to give me multiplayer. $60 for just half of the game is too expensive. Just give me Team Deathmatch, Capture the Flag, co-op, anything through an update. These developers are such cheapskates, they didn't even bother to release a physical version. I don't recommend this game at all, unless you want to support laziness. ● P.S. Metacritic, my way or the highway.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $70 for a game that is pretty much the same as the last one. The developers heavily advertised The Island, which is nothing more than a gimmick that gets old fast. How about they spend time actually improving the gameplay, instead of coming up with gimmicks. There's nothing to do in the island, it's boring and buggy. The developers were too cheap and lazy to give us proper cutscenes for the island, so it's just text-based and live-action cutscenes. MyRise has actual cutscenes, but the facial animations are laughable. The voice acting is terrible. The story appeals to neckbeards who love to watch midgets do flips. How dare these developers brag about having up to 50 players in that stupid island, and yet they can't even add a 50-man Royal Rumble. I don't want to go shopping for Jordans in a wrestling game, I just want to punch wrestlers. Even if I did want to go shopping, the in-game apparel is too expensive. So instead of wasting resources on that second life bullcrap, how about spending it on something better, like having up to 10 wrestlers in 1 ring. The hair physics are a joke. ● 2K keeps boasting about this game having over 300 wrestlers to choose from, as if that's a good thing. That number doesn't mean squat when notable wrestlers like Brock Lesnar and Goldberg are missing. We all know who John Cena is, but as I scroll right below him, there is some guy named Johnny Gargano. Who the hell is that? Brock Lesnar alone is worth more than 20 no-name wrestlers like him, and I would happily replace them for Brock. And no, I am not about to download an off-brand Brock Lesnar from the community creations. Let's face it, most of us buy these games for the legends and creations, not random nobodies like Johnny Gonorrhea. Speaking of Gonorrhea, Diarrhea Ripley and Bianca Impaired once again have higher ratings than Hulk Hogan. If you were to go to an NFL game and ask those in attendance who Rhea Ripley and Bianca Belair are, you'd be lucky to find at least 10% of people who've heard of them, but they all know who Hulk Hogan is. This is like giving Teddy Bridgewater a higher rating than Tom Brady, it's pathetic. Show Hogan some respect. ● The multiplayer is awful and I've been disconnected multiple times. The showcase mode is the worst one yet. Come on now, The Rock's family is not good enough to get their own showcase. Even the devs agree with me, considering that most of the matches are "what if" scenarios where they change and create history. And why the hell did they add that to a showcase? That's the whole point of Universe mode, stupid. Showcase should only be based on actual history. Even then, I ain't trying to play as a bunch of, nevermind, people will think I'm disrespecting the dead. If you know, you know. I'm not done ranting about Hulk Hogan's rating. "It's not that big of a deal" Hell yeah it is. No one reading this right now would care about wrestling today if it weren't for that man. A legend like that shouldn't be rated lower than 2 random women. Imagine an alternate universe without Hogan, this game would have a GameMill logo on the cover instead of a 2K one. Speaking of which, Roman Reigns has a cringeworthy face on the cover of this game. This made me remove the cover paper off the game case and rip it into pieces. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is still a huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $60 for a bad PC port full of stuttering problems and crashes. Lazy devs had 1 full year to get the job done. But I thought Insomniac were "wizards" that release "quality" at a fast rate? God, I'm sick of that bullcrap narrative. If you were to get rid of the AAA graphics and overproduced cutscenes, this game would literally be a shovelware mobile game. And just to prove my point, I want you to get hit by a train in this game. Now that you've done that, did you see how awful those physics were? Even Ubisoft can do a better job than that. Oh trust me, I can make a bazillion more examples of Insomniac's bad quality but freaking character limit. Point is Insomniac don't make quality titles and their speedy releases are nothing special when Ubisoft can do it too. Why do you think the budget was $300 million? I can't believe you nerds were shocked by that number. Why do you think rural landscapes are far more common in AAA open world games than urban, despite GTA V being such a money maker? Why do you think GTA V never got a map expansion? Think, stupid. Of course S-M2 was going to be expensive. ● There is still nothing to do in the open world. What frustrates me more than lazy developers are the fanboys who defend this trash. I remember when someone criticized this game for an unreachable subway and you had nerds be like "why would I want to take the subway when I'm Spider-Man, this isn't GTA." Aren't you the same nerds ranting about inaccessible restaurants in GTA V? I could use that same pathetic excuse for GTA V "Why would I want to eat virtual food when I can blow stuff up and cause mayhem" you see how stupid your logic is? Speaking of GTA V and "I'm Spider-Man" I've seen posts about the 2 worst story missions in GTA V pop up every now and then, and finally some common ground with you nerds. I agree, the yoga and the port mission are the worst. That's exactly why I hate this game, because it's literally like that for half the game. You're waiting tables, doing house chores, playing carnival games and doing stuff like that rather than being Spider-Man. So the "I'm Spider-Man" defense is invalid when you're not even Spider-Man half the time. So yeah, I'd much rather beat up some bad guys in the subway than play as a deaf girl vandalizing walls with her stupid SJW graffiti. ● There is still no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $60 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. I already posted a review for this game on PS5, and I can literally write a hundred more paragraphs of how awful this game is, but the character limit prevents that. Metacritic, you need to increase the limit so I can rip Insomniac and their idiotic fanboys a new one. Bottom line, this game is a shovelware piece of garbage filled with bugs and glitches with nothing to do in the open world. Due to the recent on-going backlash against SBI, I don't think this trash is an internet darling anymore, and I don't even know why this SBI stuff is news, considering that Insomniac has made it very clear back in 2017 that they've gone woke and embrace DEI. So you conservative nerds were stupid for fanboying them in the first place. But anyway, you fanboys ruined this PC port by defending Insomniac. People would rightfully call this game out for its bugs and shortcomings, but you nerds kept telling us how Insomniac can do no wrong. Insomniac were lazy, so Nixxes followed suit. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $30 for an upscaled PS1 and PS2 game. I don't remember if I played the originals or not, but seeing how you play as some weirdo with elf ears, this was definitely one of those games I've played for under an hour and never touched again. If you ever wondered why people thought you were a loser for playing video games, it's because of weird nerdy garbage like this. Is the game at least fun? The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The graphics are a joke. The physics are beyond horrible. The textures make me want to puke. The camera is trash. The controls are awful. The blood looks so fake, it looks like Minute Maid juice. Too many clipping issues. The animations are complete garbage. The puzzles are terrible. The archways have very visible polygons. The "arch" is literally made up of 4 line segments, sometimes 3. That is very unacceptable. I think Soul Reaver 2 has more lines on the arch, but does it matter? The point is that these 2 games are complete shovelware, it makes Palworld look like a AAA game. The developers were too cheap and lazy for a proper remake. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. The lack of multiplayer isn't the problem here, I mean it's half the game, half the price. The problem lies with the game not being up to par with what $30 games should be like. I don't expect top-notch AAA quality at that price, but just look at games like Fortnite and Rocket League. Not that they were $30 games, they're both free. But for reference sake, that is the bare minimum of what $30 games should look like, and even that's outdated by PS5 standards. And as you can see, this game looks and plays significantly worse. Don't give me the "it's just a remaster" bullcrap. That's no excuse to make the game look this bad. And it's not like they needed to do a full on remake, they just need to update thr game to look at least half decent with some quality of life updates. Just look at the GTA trilogy remaster, I mean that was garbage as well and worse than the originals for many reasons, but for reference sake look at how many assets they remade for it (or copied from other games). You can at least do that. I don't recommend this game at all.
I am not done with you Disney. This game also includes the PS4 version of this game, so that entitles to review this remake one more time. I am so sick and tired of developers taking shortcuts when it comes to developing games. These greedy cheapskates couldn't even make the interiors and cutscenes work in real-time. These lazy developers used the classic Mickey Mouse design in a pathetic attempt to avoid animating eyeball movements, when they could've used the modern Mickey Mouse design with the sclera. But obviously, these lazy developers didn't want to design any actual blinking. The developers are so greedy, they refused to pay for voice acting. I don't want to hear any excuses about how this is an "art style" because in the end of the day, this game costs $60. And when a developer charges me that, I am going to compare it to other $60 games when it comes to quality, content and other aspects like that. ● This garbage right here should be $30 at best. These developers are so lazy, they can't even come up with original enemy types. I don't expect anything in this day and age to be 100% original, but that boss fight with the cringeworthy laugh had yellow holographic shields, and I could've sworn I've seen that enemy in another game. Can't these developers do the bare minimum and change the color of the shields at least? That way, there's at least an ounce of originality. This is like when developers mark stuff yellow to indicate what platform you can climb on, like why does it always have to be yellow? I don't recommend this trash at all, unless you want to support laziness.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $60 for an indie quality game. Before I rip this game a new one, I do have to say that this game has better quality than the vast majority of Nintendo Switch games. Nintendo has more money than THQ Nordic by a long shot, so what's the excuse for Nintendo to not have at least this level of detail and quality? Anyway, when I pay $60, I expect top-notch AAA quality. That is exactly what this game lacks. Mickey Mouse only has the pupil for eyes in a lazy attempt to avoid adding eye movement and blinking. It is the same garbage as Zelda Echoes of Wisdom. And no, the pupil morphing from an oval to a dash, and back to an oval to give off the illusion of blinking does not count as actual blinking. If your character does not have at least a sclera and eyelids, I do not consider it blinking. Although it's worth pointing out that this game has better "blinking" animations than Echoes of Wisdom, and that Mickey Mouse "blinks" more often than Zelda. What is the meaning of this Nintendo? The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The physics are beyond horrible. The levels are poorly designed. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $60 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. I am getting real sick and tired of pre-rendered cutscenes in full-priced games. To make matters worse, most of the cutscenes are PowerPoint presentations. The developers were too lazy for real-time cutscenes. Speaking of which, there are no real-time interiors. The interiors aren't even accurate to the exterior. There are buildings with interiors that appear with magic, so that can be used as an excuse for the interiors to not match the layout of the exterior. But what about the regular buildings? Those don't appear with magic, so what's the excuse for that? If that's not bad enough, you can only explore these fake interiors through a 2D perspective. The animations are awful. The lighting is trash. There's no voice acting. The boss fights are garbage. What is it with these developers blatantly ripping-off other games? When I was fighting that boss who laughs like a moron, I could've sworn I've played a game with enemies that had those same yellow holographic shields. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $70 for a campaign that takes under 7 hours to beat with a limited multiplayer experience. Don't give me this "it takes 12 hours to beat" bullcrap, HLTB is an unreliable source for a game's length. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The physics are beyond horrible. You cannot grab weapons from the gun cabinet in real-time. The running animations are cringeworthy. The space marine suit looks like a toy. If that's not bad enough, there was a section in the campaign with a bunch of Space Marines marching to battle with those goofy toy suits alongside some goofy toy tanks, it's cringeworthy. It's reasons like this why it's embarrassing to be a gamer. The controls are clunky. The animations are awful. The graphics are too muddy and not on par with what $70 linear games should look like. The blood is overexaggerated and poorly animated. You always get an exaggerated, explosive blood effect, regardless of impact, momentum or weapon of choice. If you lazy developers can't make proper gore, then at least don't exaggerate it. Trash boss fights. And why do the NPC battles look more fun than the actual gameplay? ● There's this narrative going around that this game is "based" and masculine. Are you freaking kidding me? This is literally woke soyboy garbage built for a modern audience. And don't even get the wrong idea of why I'm calling this woke. I'm not going into detail because the mods and I aren't on good terms right now. If you truly understood the Warhammer lore, you'd understand why this is woke. Space Marine 1 came out before the woke outbreak, notice the difference? Exactly. Is this the wokest game? No, there are definitely woker games out there. But woke is woke, and I can literally name multiple Sweet Baby Inc games that are less woke than this. Be consistent, if all SBI games are woke, then this is definitely woke. Oh, I guess it's just a coincidence that one of the writers had an SJW tirade. Funny how no one gives that SJW credit for writing this "masculine" story. And you nerds know nothing about masculinity. You still collect toys, watch cartoons, never touched a wrench in your life and probably still live with your parents; you're not a man. When I think of masculinity, I think of stuff like westerns, crime dramas and action thrillers, not nerdy space trash like this. ● The multiplayer is complete trash. The developers lied that this game wasn't going to have microtransactions. As long as your game has PvP, and the MTX doesn't help derail the competitive experience or lock too much stuff behind paywalls, I don't care if your game has MTX. What bothers me more than MTX is when greedy devs dare charge me $70 without online PvP multiplayer. So the MTX isn't the problem here, it's the fact that you greedy devs lied. PvP only has a total of 3 game modes to choose from with only 3 maps. It's already bad enough that PvP is rare nowadays in full-priced games. But when we do get it, we barely get any content. And you greedy devs want $70 for this? God, you developers are too greedy and lazy. The matchmaking is terrible. Too many disconnects. Not even my bullets can connect properly for goodness sake. I was literally unloading bullets at a player and the shots were ineffective after a few rounds. And it wasn't even lag, the game is designed that way. The progression system is a joke and so is the co-op. I don't recommend this game at all.
So I've been playing this game for a while now and I was debating what to score this game. I was going back and forth on what to give this game, maybe I should give it a 4, 5, maybe even a 6. But after an incident that occurred yesterday, my mind has been made up. Let's start with the positives. The best part of this game is that it's free. Half of the maps were well designed. Stuff like the portals and the destructible environments created some interesting scenarios. The launch roster for the game is great and the powers are lore accurate. But the problem with the powers being too accurate to the lore is that it makes the game very unbalanced, but I can see that being a good thing for a Marvel fan who just wants to have fun. Now on to the negatives. Well like I said, it's unbalanced, and the devs were too lazy for a balanced game mode. This game is PvP online with unrealistic player movement and garbage animations, so one might expect the controls to be seamless, right? Wrong, they are way too clunky. The voice acting for the characters are repetitive and awful, the greedy developers paid the voice actors pennies. Galacta's voice is annoying, I just want her to shut up already. ● So I was chatting with someone about classic action movies because the game itself was starting to get boring, and that eventually prompted me to write 1989 on the chat. To my surprise, 1989 is considered inappropriate content. Are you freaking kidding me? I couldn't even write the number 89 for goodness sake. Apparently, this game censored various phrases and terms that China doesn't tolerate. I can't say 1989 because it reminds them about a certain event? What's next, am I not allowed to say Taylor Swift because it reminds them of 1989? Then Cruel Summer? Then Bananarama? Then Karate Kid? Where does the censorship end? I can't believe these sensitive babies get offended over Winnie the Pooh. God, these people aren't mentally sound. Look, I understand these devs have to censor things for China, but don't drag the rest of us down that rabbit hole. I'm a Gen X man, an early one at that, so I am bound to talk about the year 1989 and I had no intention to mention any of that John Cena bullcrap. I am so sick of developers forcing their political beliefs on us. Keep your propaganda out of video games. ● The multiplayer experience was just trash but the censorship made it really easy for me to determine the score for this game. And what is it with these conservative nerds celebrating this trash for not being woke? This is woke trash. Sure this game doesn't deliberately make women ugly like western games, but woke is woke. You are allowed to trash talk America and straight white males in the chat, but can't do the same for "protected" groups. Not that I want to do that mind you, but the double standards make this woke. "I don't care about the chat" no, be consistent. If you claim to be against censorship, then you can't defend this trash. You let this slide, it's only going to get worse from here. For me, censorship isn't the problem. Game chats have always been censored, but usually it was just a profanity filter, but at least I can swear through voice chat for rated M games. It's the principle behind censorship that bothers me. Stupid control freaks won't let me say 1989 because it reminds them of an event. I demand an official confirmation from the studio that I can at least say 1989 through voice chat without getting banned. Until then, this game is a 0. I don't recommend this commie trash at all.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $70 for an indie quality game. The graphics are a joke. It literally looks like a mobile game. This whole "art style" stuff is just an excuse for developers to be cheap and lazy. When I pay $70, I expect top-notch AAA quality. That is exactly what this game lacks. The textures in this game make me want to puke. There are too many darn jaggies and shimmering, are the developers trying to make me go blind? The developers were too cheap and lazy to add anti-alising, this is unacceptable for a $70 PS5 game. The physics are beyond horrible. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. When I pay $70, I expect a combat system with depth and detail. All the developers did in this game is put pretty lights during every move, to give players the illusion that the game is fun. None of that is fun for me. This game uses the laziest form of combat imaginable, and that's turn-based. This was clearly a lazy attempt from the devs to avoid having to program AI for the enemies. It's not that I'm fully against turn-based, but you can't be taking all these shortcuts and charge $70. I demand you work hard for that price. ● Not only do these lazy devs refuse to work, but they refuse to spend money as well. Just like a lot of these JRPGs, only some of the lines were voice acted in a pathetic attempt to keep the budget low. What a bunch of cheapskates. If this were Ubisoft, the narrative would've been so different. I'm getting real sick and tired of video game characters over-exaggerating their voices. And don't even get me started with that annoying fairy with the elf ears (enough with the elf ears), her voice is way too over-exaggerated and she sounds like one of those left-leaning Mexican-American millennials that went through an emo phase. Speaking of emo, would it kill these devs to add a barber shop because I don't want to play as weirdo with an emo haircut. Speaking of weird, this game has that stupid anime trope where certain humans have animal ears and a tail. Overexaggerted voices, elf ears, emo haircuts, humans with tails, cringeworthy opera music, like how can you not see why some people think you're a loser for playing video games? When you have journalists hyping this trash up as one of the best games this year, it's embarrassing to be a gamer. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $70 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. The animations are a joke. The story is trash. The running animations are cringeworthy and so is the dialogue. You cannot enter and exist buildings in real-time. We're not in the freaking PS2 era anymore to have this garbage interior system. I'm surprised they actually animated the characters opening treasure chests. Like why did they even bother? This game already has some of the worst visuals from a $70 game this year with a lazy combat system and awful animations. If you're going to be that lazy, you might as well go all the way and just have the treasure chests open themselves. "But this game takes 50+ hours to beat" does it look like I care? Quality over quantity. It's all copied and pasted trash anyways. You critics are a bunch of hypocrites. You run your mouth on how Ubisoft needs to "innovate" but Atlus can simply recycle Persona, reskin it and you hand them a bunch of 9s and 10s for that. I don't recommend this game at all. ● P.S. Metacritic, control your mods. My reviews are my way or the highway.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $60 for a mobile game. This game copied and pasted so many assets from Link's Awakening 2019, it is the exact same game. First TOTK and now this? And you Zelda fans have the audacity to make fun of COD for being the same game every year, yet you have to wait at least half a decade to get the same game. The graphics are a joke. The physics are beyond horrible. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. No tree variety, you see the same tree copied and pasted everywhere. You can't open chests in real-time. The broken pieces of a pot or a flying tile magically fall under the ground, rather than landing on surface. Zelda's clothes don't get soaked nor does the water land on the surface, a basic detail PS3 games can get right. The UI is terrible. ● When I pay $60, I expect top-notch AAA quality. It's already bad enough that BOTW looks like an indie game, but the quality of this game is downgraded even further for the same price. Just look at the eyes for example, BOTW has the sclera, iris, and pupil whereas this trash only has the pupil, shaped like the ones you see on Steamboat Mickey Mouse. This was clearly a lazy attempt from the developers to avoid animating eyeball movements and blinking. Furthermore, the lazy developers used the top-down camera in a pathetic attempt to not have to design the fourth wall or roof in interiors. Speaking of which, there are no real-time interiors. It's the same trash as GTA San Andreas where you go inside a small building and you spawn in a giant "interior" that's clearly too big for it. Speaking of GTA SA, the characters' fingers are stuck together. It was pathetic in 2004 and I can't believe we have that same problem 20 years later. No voice acting. Dude, you can't be taking all these shortcuts and charge $60. I expect you developers to work hard for that price. ● One thing that frustrates me about video games is when developers prompt me to "do it your way" and they don't even allow me to do it my way. I ran into invisible walls or my abilities weren't working accordingly, all because I didn't do it the developer's way. I've noticed not a single "AAA" game has ever been able to achieve the open ended mission design since 2006. The closest AAA game (after 2006) I can think of that does "open ended" mission design right is GTA V, contrary to popular belief. Obviously I'm not talking about story mode, but the Online contact missions by Gerald, Simeon, Madrazo and others. In those missions, you get a few prompts and have complete freedom on how you want to do it, without ruining the logic of the mechanics. And if you can't make open-ended missions like that, then give me step by step instructions like GTA V story mode, because you're wasting my time. Many indie games absolutely nail the open ended level design, like Human Fall Flat. It's embarrassing when indie games do a better job at open-ended level design than "AAA" games. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $60 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. So all I get is a campaign around the 11-hour mark and that's it? I would've beaten it faster if I was allowed to do it my way. They should've at least added co-op for the campaign, so we could see how other players solve puzzles. Although that's not good enough for me, I prefer PvP or exclusive content for co-op. The developers heavily advertised the ability to play as Zelda, which is nothing more than a gimmick that gets old fast. How about they spend time actually improving the performance, instead of coming up with gimmicks. It's unacceptable that this indie quality game has the same price tag as something like RDR2 or TLOU2, even if I hate the latter moreso than this game. This is the equivalent of a McDonald's cheeseburger being priced the same as a truffle, it's pathetic. I don't recommend this game at all. ● P.S. Metacritic, it's my way or the highway.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $50 for a shovelware game. That is extremely expensive. This game is severely lacking in both quantity and quality to even justify the outrageous price of $50. The graphics are a joke, it literally looks like a mobile game. This whole art style stuff is just an excuse for developers to be cheap and lazy. The physics are beyond horrible. The controls are awful. This game lacks content. The roster is ridiculously small, there are only 10 characters to choose from. There are only 4 sports too choose from: soccer, golf, basketball and tennis. Switch Sports has all of those sports and then some. The basketball minigame was implemented 2 years after the release of Switch Sports, but better late than never. On top of that, the quality was better for just $10 extra. Even then Switch Sports was too expensive and indie quality, but this takes the cake. This game may be $10 cheaper than Switch Sports, but the quality of this game isn't even close to justify it being anywhere near the $60 price range. ● There is only local multiplayer. You cannot play any of these minigames online. The developers were too cheap and lazy for online functionality. The crowd is terrible. Although it's worth pointing out that the Street Fighter 6 crowd is worse. What is the meaning of this Capcom? Imagine making details worse than a GameMill game. It just goes to show how greedy and lazy Capcom are. The animations are atrocious. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The commentary is trash, and don't even get me started with that irritating music. The audio is laughable. The soccer net in the goal post doesn't react when you score a goal, it is completely static. There are too many bugs and glitches. Given how low quality all of the sports are, I have no doubt in my mind that they were intended to be minigames for some kind of adventure game or Mario Party-esque game. But the lazy developers tapped out to whatever project that was, so they recycled all of the minigames from the scrapped game and turned it into a sports game with Looney Tunes characters. What a bunch of lazy cheapskates. I don't recommend this game at all.
So I've been playing this game for a while, and I have to say the weapons in this game are well balanced for the most part, especially after the sniper nerf. The maps are decent and this game has exceptional quality for a free-to-play shooter. Well that's pretty much the only positive things I can say about this game, because it's garbage. Really, the best part about this game is the fact that it's a COD alternative for free. If this were greedy Sony, they would've charged $40 upfront and still have the audacity to ask for more money through microtransactions. So I have to give Ubisoft credit for delivering a product like this for free, and really I'm just looking for an excuse to give a score higher than a zero so the Metacritic mods can leave me alone. However, the netcode in this game is beyond horrible. Supposedly, the update Ubisoft released today fixed the netcode. I fail to see the improvement. It just seems like they changed their values which caused the hit registration to become worse. That is not fixing the netcode. You know, it's pretty hard to tell if they fixed the netcode when these lazy developers can't add something as simple as a killcam, which brings me to my next point. ● This game is just an off-brand Call of Duty. And for that reason, this game became boring real quick. It doesn't do anything superior to COD that makes me want to return to this trash. It doesn't help that it lacks content. Every so often, off-brand companies make products that are quantity over quality to make up for the inferior quality as opposed to its branded counterpart. Well it doesn't get that right neither. Lazy developers can't even add the most basic features from COD. As I mentioned earlier, there is no kill cam. Are you freaking kidding me? That's essential so I can see if my opponent killed me fair and square. No regular Team Deathmatch. The maps are built for TDM for goodness sake. Apparently it will be included June 21, but that should've been there since launch. No prone. How can you call yourself a COD killer when you can't even add these basic features at launch? The hitboxes are poor. You get shot around walls. The progression system is awful. The spawns are terrible. The matchmaking is unbalanced. Well it's free, so you might as well give it a try to see if it's for you. ● Edit: I'm changing my score from a 4 to a 0. This is the most disingenuous 4 I have ever given to a game, and I only did that because I was looking for an excuse to give a game higher than a 0, and 4 is the highest I'm willing to go for a terrible game. And it was free, so I chose this over any other trash to give a 4 to, in an attempt to get these mods to leave me alone. But since these mods insist on removing my reviews, what's the point of looking for excuses for higher scores? This was just an off-brand COD that got boring real quick. Maybe I could give this game a 2 for a decent quality COD game for free, but new players aren't allowed to play, so 0 it is. And yeah I'm aware online only games are bound to shut down, but 0 was the first thing that popped into my mind when playing this, and I think it deserves that. Jamboree will be my last excuse review, no more excuses. From now on, complete honesty.
This game has some of the best boards from the Mario Party series. But that's pretty much the best part of this game, because it's garbage. One of my main complaints about Mario Party Superstars was the lack of new minigames. Yeah I'm aware that the Superstars game was supposed to be a collection of the best Mario Party minigames from previous entries, but there wasn't a single rule dictating that they couldn't add new ones to go along with it. Well this game does have new minigames, but I much prefer Superstars over Jamboree, because the former was a collection of the greatest hits whereas this one suffers from trash minigames. While this game did have several fun minigames like the bomb defusing minigame, the one with the carousel and the ones that require teamwork, the majority of them are garbage. Some of them are reskinned minigames from previous Mario Party games like the baseball minigame but with food. Some were complete shovelware like the gate one. Some wasted your time because of some stupid rules. The developers also chose some of the worst minigames from previous Mario Party games, which I'll get to that later. ● The developers bragged about this game having the most minigames out of the series, but in reality it has fewer minigames than Superstars. The greedy developers are counting the minigames from the triathlon mode as minigames, and it's ridiculous that none of those minigames are playable through the normal Mario Party mode. They could've easily turned those solo modes into 4 player minigames, but the developers were too greedy and lazy for that. Don't get me wrong, I like it when game modes have exclusive content. But when the main Mario Party game mode lacks minigames, well then I demand you convert the triathlon games into 4 player minigames. I'm getting real sick and tired of Nintendo's obsession with making Bowser the main antagonist of Mario games. You'd think with the inclusion of Bowser as a playable character, that would guarantee a new antagonist, right? Wrong, you still get Bowser as the antagonist, they just made him larger with purple glow and called him an imposter. Triathlon mode did have its fun moments, but it lacks the scope of Fall Guys. Although it is playable offline, so it does have that going for it. ● The multiplayer is fine I guess, but people can easily cheat in the Domination minigame online. And that other returning minigame with the hoops is unbalanced, since the middle players have the advantage. But the main problem with Mario Party games is lack of content and depth. I feel like they should add a 3D Mario adventure game to go along with the minigames, because $60 is too expensive. Or they should make better use of those boards. They put all that effort into making those boards, and you can only interact with the spaces. Imagine if you could use that mall map for like a Mario vs Luigi DS mode, but it's in 3D and you can have around 12-20 players in free-for-all or in teams. Or maybe just normal Team Deathmatch with Mario lore. Now that could've been biblical and given this game more value, but the developers are too greedy and lazy for that. Look Metacritic, I just can't keep looking for excuses to score a game higher than a 0. But if I have to give a game a 4, this is the closest one, because I can't find a single darn game to give at least a mixed score to, not one that was released this decade that is. I recommend this game until it's $15-20.
I am not done with you Sony. A family member of mine owns this game so that entitles me to review this game again. I do remember playing it earlier this year at his house during some party, and this family member always waits for the complete edition rather than getting it at launch, so he has the "GOTY" edition of Spider-Man 1 as well. One thing I'll say about HFW complete edition is that it includes all the DLC in the disc, unlike the greedy developers at Insomniac who put the SM1 disc. Will I give them credit for that? Absolutely not. Guerrilla Games still joined the greedy trend of having paid DLC within a year. Technically it was about 14 months but that's still close enough. If a dev is going to release story DLC, they need to wait at least 18 months before releasing it. That way I know devs aren't deliberately holding back content to get extra money. Anyways, notice how Insomniac and Guerrilla Games have different business practices despite having the same publisher? That's why I blame the devs, not the higher-ups. ● When I take at look at developers nowadays, I'm just here asking myself where are all the real men at? It's just a bunch of soyboys and women. People give studios too much credit for a game's quality. It irks me when nerds say stuff like "Naughty Dog devs are great; Ubisoft are lazy" you buffoons do realize it's the same people working on these games, right? My son's friend is a game dev, and she worked on critically acclaimed AAA games but also worked on hated AAA games. You don't even need to meet a dev to know this, they run their mouths on social media all the time about the studios they've worked for. I hate to criticize my son's friend, but it needs to be said. She's easily one of the laziest individuals I have ever met in my life, and the fact that many game devs act like her tells me everything I need to know about them. Just a bunch of lazy know-it-all SJW hipsters. "But that's just one dev" nope I knew about half a dozen, although they weren't AAA developers, not that I know of. Lazy devs everywhere. Trust me, if you lived my lifestyle, you would get to meet all sorts of people to the point where you know people too well. There's this other dev I should rant about, but perhaps another time. ● So what's that one thing that generally makes a game have better quality than the other? Budget. So would you stop with the "Insomniac are talented" bullcrap? I can't believe nerds are shocked by how expensive Sony's AAA games are. Well yeah stupid, why do you think their graphics and cutscenes look better than most games? And then you wonder why some devs do live services over singleplayer games. That's your fault because when studios did do SP games, you roasted them for not looking as good as Sony games, completely missing the fact that Sony is richer than everyone but Microsoft. So most studios only have 2 options: make a SP game that looks terrible or make a live-service. It's a lose-lose situation, so might as well go for what's most profitable, right? If only devs weren't so out of touch, this probably wouldn't be problem. ● "The higher-ups are at fault" Oh shut up already. If you devs were as hard working as you claim to be, your games would reflect that. Why don't I let you in on a secret. When the higher-ups care so much about awards and give you long development cycles, it is you, the developer who is in charge. You're just going to let them pick on you? You have them in a trap, now stand up for yourself. How do you stand up to your boss? All I'm going to say is don't let your ego overestimate you, don't let self-deprecation underestimate you. Know your worth. Oh for goodness sake, you devs went to college and I didn't. If I was able to figure it out, surely you can too. I already made it clear that I will quit gaming forever if a studio makes a highly successful $70 game that will trigger the nerds. But it looks like that's not happening anytime soon since game devs are so out of touch. You better listen to me, unless you want to get laid off. I'm buying games again, if your game fails to deliver and you're so greedy and lazy, then you'll get a negative score. Let's see what game will make me quit gaming forever, and how about I kick things off with TDU Solar Crown. ● P.S. Metacritic, I already told you. It's my way or the highway.
And speaking of Sweet Baby Inc and wokeness, that reminds me I got Saints Row for free on Epic Games Store last year. So that entitles me to review this game one more time. It is the exact same garbage as the PS5 version. I already reviewed this trash, so how about I talk about these anti-woke nerds instead. I don't want the developers to confuse me with these pests when I rant about wokeness, so this needs to be said. The difference between me and these nerdy anti-woke gamers is that I can admit every AAA studio has gone woke. I was literally the first person on the internet to say that, just look at my FH5 review. And what do you know, I was right. Go ahead and find someone who said it before me. Spoiler alert, you can't. And if you did found someone, it definitely wasn't a millennial, I can tell you that much. Do you want to know why I was the first one to say that, even though every AAA studio have implicitly admitted that they've gone woke well over a year before I said that? Because of fanboyism and agendas. That's why they keep moving the goalpost on what woke is, because they can't admit their beloved studios have gone woke. ● Anti-woke grifters keep backpedaling on what woke is, therefore making conservatives like me look stupid. Judging by the reception of this game and BG3, most of them seem to think that woke is something they dislike with liberal propaganda. What if I told you that something can be woke but you can still like it? It's almost as if we don't need to have the same beliefs as the creators to enjoy their products. I know right, who would've thought such a concept was possible. But of course these narcissists will never admit that and because of that, the wokeness will never end. Since these morons can't define woke, let me take a shot. Woke is when you deliberately push for contemporary leftist ideologies, especially for pandering purposes. I just don't want these developers to confuse me with these fools. They're a bunch of socially inept losers collecting toys, I am not them. ● The multiplayer is still trash. The greedy developers only have co-op for up to 2 players. Lazy developers can't even add PvP. I gave Saints Row on PS5 a 1 for the customization. Car customization is good and you can download character creations from other players. You can use the characters and cars in an urban open world setting with an adequate AAA budget, which is rare nowadays. And for that, I felt like I had to give them credit for that. Then again, this is probably the least deserving 1 I have ever given to a game. The PC version appeared to be buggier than the console version, and apparently it was worse at launch. So for that, I have to give this version a 0. I don't recommend this game at all. ● P.S. I warned you Metacritic. My way or the highway from now on.
I am not done with you, whatever the name of your studio is. The PS4 version of this game is also included on the PS Extra catalogue, so that entitles me to review this game one more time. The PS4 version is the exact same as the PS5 version. It's embarrassing that the PS4 ans PS5 version look worse than MLB The Show 14 and I think even MLB The Show 13 looked better than this trash. The fact that I have to talk about games looking better a decade ago proves how greedy and lazy these developers are. Despite this, the greedy developers have the audacity to charge $60 for this piece of garbage. And I thought EA and Take-Two were greedy, but these developers take greed to a whole new level. Everything about this game is shovelware quality. Look, no-name devs. You can make all the shovelware you want, but how dare you give me an online multiplayer experience that is still broken months down the line. I don't recommend this game at all. ● P.S. Metacritic, your mods have some nerve. By now, I'm aware which kind of mods are messing with my reviews. Most of your mods are liberals, but I bet one of them is an anti-woke "centrist" and this particular individual always seems to anticipate my reviews and does something to them. I can tell by his actions that he is one of those toy-collecting millennial conservatives. This guy must really like my reviews or something. I see you're trying to control the narrative. Listen, just because you are anti-woke doesn't mean I like you. I hate toy-collecting nerds, soy boys, bully victims, the unemployed, the socially inept, Jesus freaks and I just hate losers regardless of your political beliefs. Not because I just want to hate but let's be honest, if the type of people I mentioned vanished today, the world would be just fine in both wants and needs. But if the complete opposite vanished, the world would be in serious trouble. I'm not a conservative because I want to "own the libs." I am conservative because I believe in things like hard work, discipline and honesty. None of that nerd trash. From now on, my reviews will be my way or the highway.
This game is a pile of garbage. When I pay $60, I expect top-notch AAA quality. That is exactly what this game lacks. The only thing that can be considered AAA quality is the graphics, but this is a 9th gen only game running in UE5. Even then, the game still doesn't look good enough. This is clearly a AA game, and the game looks terrible thanks to those awful 2010 animations. And don't even get me started with those reloading animations, it is laughable and PS2 quality. The physics are beyond horrible. The story is poorly written. The shooting mechanics are trash. The gore is a joke. This game is buggy, but not as buggy as Spider-Man 2. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The level design is trash. Once again, the greedy developers are joining the greedy trend of charging PS5 owners an extra $10 for absolutely no reason. It's $50 on PC. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, this game will go back to the shelf and collect dust. Charging $60 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. Despite everything wrong with this game, it's better than Spider-Man 2, because RoboCop Rogue City is actually an action game that doesn't interrupt the flow with Life Is Strange missions. RoboCop RC doesn't have some moron also calling himself Robocop who will eventually replace the original for woke reasons. RoboCop RC isn't full of arty farty garbage. RoboCop RC doesn't make you play as anyone else but RoboCop. RoboCop RC doesn't pander for those ESG scores. The only things Spider-Man 2 does better than RoboCop is because of Insomniac's massive budget, not to mention you'd expect a $70 game to have better quality than a $50-60 game. I would almost like to give them credit for those reasons but with the $60 price tag, you can forget about it. "I'd buy that for a dollar" yeah I would only recommend this game at that price. ● P.S. Metacritic, I warned your mods. They don't get to control the narrative. From now on, I will write my reviews however the hell I want. I will still set my limits as I do have to follow some rules, but other than that, it's my way or the highway. I toned down my reviews, I ignored politics, I looked for excuses to give a game higher than a 0, and I did all of that for you. But no matter what I do, your spineless mods always delete my reviews. I can make the most inoffensive review imaginable, and it will still get deleted if I don't follow their narrative. That's not how reviews work. And if they're going to keep doing that, why should I tone down my reviews? They will delete it anyways. I might as well just say whatever I want to say at this point. I knew that anti-woke mod was going to mess with one of reviews. And I knew he was going fail thanks to all the glitches this site has. And I can tell a liberal nerd deleted this review and ReFantazio. Don't know when because I was busy when that happened, but I know they were 2 different mods messing with my reviews. I do what I want, that's final.
This game is a pile of garbage. I thought this would be pure shovelware, but the devs actually put some work into this game, considering the low budget. The destruction animations look somewhat detailed. Then again, it's easier for these lazy devs to achieve that decent level of quality when the game is 2D, so I won't give them credit for that. But it's worth pointing out that this game looks way better than that shovelware piece of garbage that is Animal Well, and they both cost the same. Animal Well literally makes this game look like a AAA game. What is the meaning of this Dunkey? You keep running your mouth about other studios, and yet you're the biggest cheapskate of them all. You literally need to cut the fat, stop stuffing your face with Dunkin' Donuts and use that money on your games instead. While better than Animal Well, these greedy developers didn't work hard enough, because the combat system and physics are an absolute joke. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The levels are poorly designed. King Kong size doesn't remain consistent throughout the levels. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. The fall damage is ridiculous in this game. I instantly died when I fell from the second floor of a building and onto a box. How was I suppose to know that would kill me? It's the same garbage as Witcher 3 and Uncharted 4. I am getting real sick and tired of these surprise deaths and failures in video games. The lazy developers are suppose to let me know ahead of time when I can possibly die. Speaking of death, I am also sick to death of developers being so obsessed with giant spiders. Listen soyboys, there is nothing scary about a tiny freaking animal that can easily be defeated by junk mail. Yeah I get it, Skull Island is filled with giant animals, but the enemy spiders (not the one fighting King Kong) aren't even lore accurate to the movies. Not in size that is. It would've made better sense to have that cricket bug thing from the Peter Jackson movie instead, seeing how it's about the same size as the in-game enemy spiders. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a pile of garbage. The greedy developers had the audacity to charge $50 for this indie quality game that you can beat in under 5 hours. That is extremely expensive. The graphics are trash, it looks like a mobile game. The physics are terrible. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The boss fights are a joke. Gargamel only has one blinking animation in a repeated loop during a boss fight. The levels are poorly designed and they ripped off Sonic with those rails. When I first played this, I was thinking this game would be pure shovelware in the same vein as Skull Island: Rise of Kong, but to my surprise it's actually better than that. I mean just look at the plants, they actually react to your movements. Then again, it is a platformer with a fixed top-down camera. Lazy developers don't have to worry about draw distance with this lazy game design. This is exactly why I hate many Nintendo games, because their $60 games can easily be replicated by no-name studios for a cheaper price. But how many of them can replicate the quality of AAA games like RDR2? Most of them would tap out to the multiplayer before they can get started with anything else, which brings me to my next point. ● The multiplayer is the laziest form of multiplayer imaginable and that is co-op for the campaign. To make matters worse, it is only local. There is no online option for co-op. Well at least there is a co-op option for the campaign, because there's this other company that can't add that feature in some of their games despite being worth billions, I'm looking at you Nintendo. If this game can have local co-op, then there's no excuse as to why this feature is completely absent from Mario & Luigi: Brothership. On top of that, this game looks better than Brothership; none of that contour lines bullcrap. What is the meaning of this Nintendo? Sure Brothership may be longer, but that's because there's a bunch of that copy/paste turn-based stuff. Even the trails look better for goodness sake. This game was made by a no-name studio, and the fact that it looks better than Brothership is literal proof that Nintendo developers are greedy and lazy, not to mention they couldn't even add co-op to Brothership. I got this game for $30 but I judge games by their initial price. This game was $50 and I expected better quality and content for that price. Even at $30, this game is still not worth it. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $60 for an unfinished game. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The physics are beyond horrible. The AI is incredibly stupid. The hit detection for small animals is trash. There are too many shimmering and stuttering issues. The shadows look terrible. The audio is a joke. Lazy developers couldn't even make proper destruction physics for the boxes when hit by a knife, it pops like a balloon. All UE5 games look and feel the same, no one is using the engine to its true potential. The grenades are underpowered. The spawning system is unfathomable. There are many bugs and glitches. "Oh, you can just reload the save" see that's the thing. I can't always tell if it's a bug or intentional. A NPC was blocking my path, and I thought he was meant to be there but then I found out it's a bug. And when I do reload a game, the AI acts like it came straight from a CDPR game. Speaking of CDPR, there's misinformation being spread around that this game is as broken as CP2077. That is a complete lie. This game is definitely buggy, but it's about as buggy as Spider-Man 2, not CP2077. Oh man, CP2077 was beyond broken. ● This game truly deserves a 0, but the devs did say its going have PvP multiplayer. And to be fair, I did give RDR2 a positive score before the multiplayer was out (but I did get what I expected). I also took online into account when giving RE8 a 4, and it deserved that (although it's unacceptable to delay it for months). And for that, I'll just give this game a 1, even if it turns out to be the worst multiplayer. But that's the highest I'll give it since the campaign (the easy part) was broken, so I can only imagine the online being worse. And I don't really like the gameplay, so I don't see myself liking online. But there's a reason why I allow the online to get delayed, because these critics would score a game lower if they didn't like it. Not that I care about scores, but the influence it has on the industry. Just look at Tomb Raider 2013, they docked points for bad multiplayer. And when a game has no online, they don't even dock points for it (that is so stupid) so the devs dropped the PvP for the sequels and locked co-op behind paywalls. Yeah, thanks a lot critics. ● But I just can't take the devs' word for it when they say multiplayer is coming soon. Not anymore after seeing so many AAA devs tap out to multiplayer this gen, so I'll have to update my review process. First I'm going to need an in-engine trailer for the online to confirm its existence. Then I'm going to need a release date, and you can only delay it for up to 1 month as the critic review cycle should be over by then. You fail to do these 2 things before the game is out, your game doesn't have multiplayer, and I'll treat it that way no matter what. But if you succeed on those 2 things, I'll take that into account. But I'm not letting you off that easy, because I'm not a psychic and it's not fair to those who do release it at launch. Even though online is about the same as singleplayer (but with other players), devs still mess up the most basic things these days. So if the online is not what I expect it to be, I will not edit the score. I will however give it a 0 to every other platform to compensate for the score I gave you. So you better give me online multiplayer at launch if you don't want to deal with this, or lower your prices. I need multiplayer. I don't recommend this game at this state.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $60 for a lower quality version of Horizon Zero Dawn and Forbidden West. You dare charge me $60, I expect the same level of quality as the original Horizon games. And I understand Lego games are going to be worse in quality due to the nature of Legos, but that's why it shouldn't be $60, lower the freaking price. What's there to say about this game, it's your typical Lego game. Even by Lego standards, this game is not on par with other Lego games. There's only 4 characters you can choose from, whereas in other Lego games, there are hundreds of characters you can choose from. Like that Lego Batman game, you can play as Superman, Joker, Flash and all those other guys, each with their own unique abilities. In this trash, it boils down to who can use a melee weapon and who can't. The level design is a joke. It's literally just a bunch of empty spaces, all the lazy developers did was randomly spawned enemies and called it a day. It lacks the variety of your average Lego game, which already lacks variety in itself. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. Aloy's voice is too over-exaggerated, it's annoying. ● It's painfully obvious that Sony approached Lego to make this game, and not vice versa. If you pay attention to pretty much every licensed Lego game ever made, they're all mainstream successful franchises. That middle-aged woman you see belting out Billy Joel tunes, downward-facing on her yoga mat and attending book clubs; yeah, I'm sure she's heard of Star Wars, Indiana Jones, and all of those successful franchises. But when you ask her about the Horizon series, she'll give you a Conor McGregor response. Sony must've paid Lego a fortune to have them agree to be associated with such a niche franchise. Sony, stop trying to make Aloy happen, it's a waste of money. Aloy isn't a thing, and she will never be a thing. What The Rock and The Undertaker are to the wrestling industry, that's basically what Sony wants Aloy to be to the video game industry. But no matter how hard Sony tries, Aloy and the Horizon series will always be the Dolph Ziggler of video games. Hey Sony, you want Aloy to be Playstation's Mario? Then get rid of that ridiculous hairstyle, and stop making women so ugly for goodness sake. That brings me to my next point. ● There is only 2 player co-op for the campaign. That is the laziest form of multiplayer imaginable. But hey, at least there's some form of multiplayer. And you know, it's funny that Guerilla Games got another studio to work on this game. Seeing how nearly every Lego game has some form of multiplayer, Lego definitely forced Sony to put multiplayer in this game. Guerilla Games can't do multiplayer these days, so they hired another studio to do all the work. It's pathetic that the multiplayer shares the same screen, and Guerilla Games still can't pull it off on their own. Anyways, multiplayer is what you're going to need if you want any chance of that pear head becoming the face of Playstation. You can start by giving us Team Deathmatch, Capture the Flag, Last Team Standing or whatever. Given how low quality Lego games are, now is your chance to test the waters to see if people would be interested in Horizon PvP multiplayer. But if you refuse to do that, well then have fun watching the Horizon series fail. The physics are beyond horrible. You can't open chests in real-time. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $60 for an off-brand Lego game. There are roofless cars, implying that they're supposed to be driven by Funko Pops. I didn't even know Funko Pops had cars. Well you can't drive any of them. There is a section where I have to race KITT, but since there are no drivable cars, I have to race him on foot. Are you freaking kidding me? And what do millennials see in these freaking toys? First of all, I don't think grown men should be collecting toys. Especially if you're over 30 years old with no kids and you have a bunch of toys, I'm just going to assume the worst of you. But if one must collect toys, at least get something with a little more variety, because after playing this trash, I doubt Funko Pops could ever be fun as a video game. Anyways, I do appreciate it when toy games try to appeal to an older audience by adding stuff like Knight Rider and Back to the Future. But the problem is these models look nothing like the person they are trying to portray. It's literally the same funko pop model but they just change the outfit/hair and call it Chief Brody, Michael Knight or whatever character they claim it is. ● The developers claimed that co-op is coming. Okay then, where the hell is it? I heard it's available on Steam, but I don't want to freaking play it on PC. It's been 2 months already, how long do I have wait for it to be on PS5? Thanks a lot CDPR for normalizing this behavior. And this better be exclusive content for co-op, not just co-op for the campaign. Either way, I'm getting real sick and tired of co-op being the only multiplayer option available for full-priced games these days. Man, I miss the days when you finished beating the campaign, you can continue the fun with Team Deathmatch or some other online PvP mode. Nowadays, many studios that once gave us online are tapping out to multiplayer altogether. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The physics are beyond horrible. The missions are poorly designed. There are many invisible walls. Lazy cheapskates don't have to worry about animating the mouths and they still can't deliver a decent product. No snow deformation. The combat is laughable. The puzzles are a joke. You can't switch between characters instantly like you can in Lego games, and no customization like in Lego. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $60 for a mobile game. The graphics are a joke. This whole "art style" stuff is just an excuse for developers to be cheap and lazy. When I pay $60 I expect top-notch AAA quality, no exceptions. I don't want to hear any excuses about the Switch being underpowered, because isn't it supposed to be more powerful than the PS3? Then why do the footprints in the snow and sand disappear so quickly? 3 seconds? In GTA V and TLOU1, the footprints remain on the sand for a much longer period of time, and that was on PS3 hardware. That is embarrassing. The trails look so fake, it literally looks like someone accidentally spilled beige paint on green-colored paper and called that spilled overlay a trail. The iris is missing from Mario and Luigi's eyes. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. These cheapskates used the laziest form of combat, and that's turn-based combat. That way, the lazy developers don't have to worry about working on the enemy AI. Despite all the shortcuts these developers took to create this shovelware mobile game, it still suffers from performance issues. ● There is a big canon that is equipped with a telescope, and its purpose is to access the islands. When using the telescope to search for an island, you can clearly see that the eyepiece view is circular. That implies that the optical lens are round; obviously they're supposed to be round. But right when I chose to launch onto an island, I was horrified when I saw that the optical tube and lens had a polygon shape. When I used the telescope for a second time, I paid close attention to see if my eyes were deceiving me. And as I took a closer look I was able to see that the tube and lens had, what appeared to be, a decagon shape. When I saw that, I immediately grabbed my chair and threw it against the wall and walked off. I'm aware that Nintendo makes nothing but indie quality games, but this is taking it too far. This is completely unacceptable for a 2024 $60 game. I was debating whether to quit this game at that point, but I eventually continued. The rope bridge does not wobble when you walk on it, and it doesn't react to your movements at all. When I smashed giant rocks, the broken pieces magically fall under the ground. This is a $60 game, where is the detail? ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $60 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. The warp pipe has 2 pairs of footprints, suggesting co-op was in development, but the lazy devs tapped out to multiplayer. Since Luigi is useless in this game and acts pretty much as a companion, multiplayer could've fixed that problem. There were sections that looked accessible but I was met with invisible walls. The animations are laughable. The physics are trash. The attacks are awful. The Clockout Blow is the absolute worst, because half of the time the hammer is not hitting the enemies, yet they take damage. And what's with the black outlines on the characters? I paid $60, I do not want to see any contour lines at that price, or at least where it's not applicable. When I pay $60, I expect a combat system with depth and detail. All the developers did in this game is put pretty lights during every move, to give players the illusion that the game is fun. The developers also added cute upbeat music to give players the illusion that the game is fun. None of that is fun for me. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $20 for a remaster of a PS2 game. That's double the price of the original version that's available on PS Plus Premium. That is extremely expensive. The graphics are a joke. This isn't even a true remaster, it's a freaking port. It looks nearly the same as the original PS2 version. I guess the lighting was improved, the visuals look less blurry and it has better shadows. But that's about it. It also has a 16:9 aspect ratio but is it really on that format? Because the characters look a little too fat, or was it always like this? If this game is double the price of the PS2 classic, then I think it should double the quality. Otherwise, what's the extra $10 for? This should've been a free upgrade for existing owners. Even by $20 standards, this game does not hold up to the average $20 games of today. Just to be clear, my review is based on the remaster, not my thoughts on the original during the PS2 era. Come to think of it, I don't see anything good about this game; it's boring. The camera is still awful. The AI is still incredibly stupid, the enemies walk into pits and fall to their deaths. The textures make me want to puke. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Sure the original didn't have multiplayer, but there isn't a single rule dictating that they can't add multiplayer. Maybe if this game had multiplayer, I could've had fun and it would've justified the $20 price tag, but the developers were too cheap and lazy for multiplayer. Or how about improve the goofy physics? There are too many polygons and there are characters with their fingers stuck together, and you greedy devs want to charge $20 for this trash? This has to be some kind of joke, there's no way in hell this is serious. You are much better off getting the $10 version. Sure you may get something that looks a little more dim and blurry with a 4:3 aspect ratio, but it's not like the $20 version is any better. So basically the PS Plus version is the $10 burger, and the "remastered" version is that same burger for $20 but with cheese, it's pathetic. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $40 for a shovelware mobile game. The graphics are a joke. The physics are beyond horrible. The lighting is atrocious and the colors look washed out, it has that same garbage look as Saints Row 2. It is unacceptable that a PS5 game looks this bad, even for a $40 game. The animations are laughable. The audio is terrible, especially when the water splashes. The plants don't react to your movements. The rocks look awful, they are way too pointy and the polygons are very noticeable. The world is too static. I can't destroy the sandcastles, nor can I push or kick the beach ball. The segway physics are pathetic. When going downhill across a rocky terrain, you magically float in the air. It doesn't stick to the ground correctly. Only the cutscenes are voice-acted. The in-game dialogue lacks voice acting. These cheapskates didn't want to pay to have all lines voice-acted. Well at least there's partial voice acting, whereas Zelda EOW has none. What is the meaning of this Nintendo? If this shovelware piece of garbage can have voice acting, there's literally no excuse for Echoes of Wisdom to lack voice acting. ● The multiplayer is complete trash. There is only local multiplayer for the minigames. There isn't any multiplayer for the adventure mode. Maybe if this game had online for the adventure mode, it could've made for a fun game. And if you're going to rely on the minigames for the multiplayer, would it kill you to add online? The idea of having an adventure mode alongside the minigames looks good on paper, and Nintendo should consider doing that for their Mario Party games. But the execution for this game was awful, both modes are lazily designed. The minigames are all poorly designed. Where is the variety? Why is there no 3 vs 1 minigame? This is literally just an off-brand Mario Party game. Some of the minigames contain annoying sounds, which makes it unbearable to play. The developers are so lazy, they couldn't even add collision physics for the segway. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The tasks for the adventure mode are all dreadful and uncreative. I don't recommend this game at all, unless you want to support laziness.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $40 for a 2D side scrolling shovelware game. The graphics are a joke. It literally looks like a Sega Genesis game. This whole retro art-style stuff is just an excuse for developers to be cheap and lazy. Cobra Kai Dojos Rising 2 is also a shovelware piece of garbage, but even that game looks better than this trash. At least it's 3D and you have characters and logos that resemble what you see from the show. Another thing that makes Dojo Rising 2 better than this trash is the fact that there is voice acting from some of the actors of the show. For obvious reasons, they can't include the orginal voice actors, but I still expect voice acting or something else to compensate for the lack of it, because $40 is extremely expensive for a pixelated shovelware game. The minigames are awful. The physics are beyond horrible. The boss fights are terrible. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. ● One thing I found funny about the Karate Kid movies was watching a short chubby old man beating up multiple grown men at once. I mean, that's a load of bullcrap. But I can't even laugh at that in this game, because you just play as pixelated man with white hair called Mr. Miyagi. Speaking of which, you can only play as LaRusso, his girlfriends and Miyagi, making it four playable characters in total. You can't play as Johnny or any other character. I know they play a part in the story, but does it matter? You can completely break the lore by playing as Ali for instance. She can beat up Johnny in the All Valley Tournament and appear in the chapters after that, despite her absence in the sequels. Taking that into account, why the hell can't I play as the other characters that are already in the game? The developers are so lazy, they copied the enemies from California and pasted them in Japan. Just look at that fat guy for example, all the lazy devs did was change his hair from blonde to black and called it a day. You fight in the streets but no cars are driving around. It would be fitting to have them as obstacles, seeing how LaRusso almost gets hit by cars in the first movie, not to mention he is a car guy. ● The multiplayer is trash. It is the laziest form of multiplayer and that is co-op for the campaign. There is only local multiplayer, no online. If I remember correctly, Dojos Rising had online multiplayer for the All Valley Tournament. See what I mean, lazy and greedy developers everywhere, they just keep evolving backwards. The campaign is ridiculously short, it is about 2 hours long, a little shorter than that actually. And the "other modes" is literally sections taken from the campaign, like the boss fights and minigames. The cutscenes are PowerPoint Presentations. Why did they even bother making these cutscenes when this game is already shovelware? Not that it takes much work to make those lazily designed cutscenes but If you're going to be this lazy, you might as well go all the way. They should've just used some clips from the movies and make those the cutscenes instead. Currently $30 but I don't recommend this game at all, unless you want to support laziness.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $40 for this game and there isn't a singleplayer campaign. The developers were too cheap and lazy for a campaign. Well at least the developers did include an offline mode, albeit limited but it's there. And this is just proof that COD devs were greedy and lazy for offline modes in BO6, because they didn't even try. But anyways, $40 is too expensive for a game that only features the multiplayer mode and that's it. There's not enough content to justify that outrageous price. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The animations are atrocious. The animations when grabbing the cotten candy look terrible. The physics are beyond horrible. This game lacks so much detail. The whole world feels static, there is nothing you can interact with, other than grabbing weapons and opening drawers/boxes, which you cannot open in real-time. There are many bugs and glitches. Everything about this game is shovelware quality. ● The clown shoes make annoying squeaky noises. At first I didn't mind, but when I kept hearing those squeaky noises over and over again, it was starting to get on my nerves. Squeak after squeak after squeak, it was driving me insane and I just couldn't take it anymore. I'm completely done with this game because I swear if I ever hear that squeak one more time, I'm going to break my PS5. And that wasn't even the worst part, the minigame music is also annoying, particularly the one where you have to repeat the beat. Let me just concentrate on the freaking minigame, why did these developers added that annoying carnival-esque music for? To distract me? It doesn't help that its melody resembles some irritating XTC song that a neighbor used to play repeatedly in that stupid trailer park in the late 70s. It's a stupid clown game, so I did expect there to be annoying music and sounds, but man did it ended up worse than I could ever imagine. And I don't remember the movie having sounds this freaking annoying. I was expecting a similar experience to the movie, but this is just a reskinned Friday the 13th game, an inferior one at that. ● The multiplayer is complete trash. It is 3 clowns vs 7 humans, and the humans got to escape. It's so boring and repetitive. This game is poorly balanced. The clowns are too underpowered and move way too slow. And these developers want to make it 3 clowns vs 7 humans? Are they crazy? And I already mentioned earlier about the clown shoes, so I hate having to play as the clowns regardless. It's boring to play as the humans. You can't even pick what role you want to play. The running animations are cringeworthy. The maps are awful and lazily designed. The blood looks so fake and exaggerated, it literally looks like ketchup is coming out. The plants don't react to your movement. There are no proper animations for getting on top of benches. I appreciate there are minigames when spectating but again, the music annoys me. I don't recommend this game at all.
I am not done with you Activision. I got the cross-gen bundle, so that entitles me to review this game one more time. The PS4 version is even worse than the PS5 version. The greedy developers downgraded the graphics for the PS4 version. Obviously the PS5 version will look better, but the ground textures in the PS4 version looks awful; I know that the PS4 can do better than that. This game does however have some things that many AAA studios fail to deliver on, like up-to-date graphics, a good level of detail, a campaign with mission variety and online multiplayer. Surely that means I'll give this a decent score, right? Nope, because these lazy developers always find a way to screw things up. And then these mods want to scold me for giving too many negative reviews. How the hell is any of that my fault? Do you think I deliberately go out of my way and be like "yeah I totally want to give so many games a negative score" no, these greedy and lazy cheapskates keep messing up the most basic things imaginable. Of course I expected the game to require internet to download based on previous entries, but always online? Even for the freaking campaign? ● If you mods want to mess with people, why don't you go mess with the toy-collecting Call of Duty haters, because all of them are inconsistent. COD games definitely deserve criticism (every game does) but I'm talking about the "GOW 10/10 GOTY" weirdos with a superiority complex. They claim COD is the same game every year, yet the internet darling games they praise are also recycled or just low-budget shovelware garbage. It's almost as if they are looking for excuses to hate on COD, and I think it's because they're jealous that the internet darlings don't get frequent releases. For instance, it's been nearly a decade and still no announcement for a Witcher sequel. See, that's the difference between me and the nerdy "muh dark story" COD haters. I don't need to look for excuses to hate on anything, the developers are the ones giving me reasons to hate on their games with their never-ending greed and laziness. If anything, I've been looking for excuses to give games a decent score. And as for you nerdy COD haters, I demand you show COD players a little bit of respect, because if it weren't for them, Sony's arty farty movie games would've never gotten a big budget. And then they wonder why women don't like them. ● Okay but enough with COD haters. I just brought that up because they always cry when someone makes fun of gamers. How do you expect anyone to respect your hobby when you can't even respect your fellow gamers, but I digress. But if there's one thing I don't respect, is when developers are greedy and lazy. In this case, I have to blame the publisher moreso than the developers, because COD devs don't have the freedom of Rockstar or Naughty Dog to take an eternity to develop a game. I understand the circumstances, your hands are tied. Since the higher-ups don't care about awards, you can't stand up for yourself. But I'll still put some of the blame on the devs. Who developed the game? You did. You didn't even try to give me a single offline mode, and because of that you're greedy and lazy. You devs need to at least convince the publisher to drop the previous gen version, that way you may have enough time to implement offline modes. And quite frankly, I don't care what went behind the scenes. Your game either meets my expectations for the price you're offering or it doesn't. And this game absolutely failed at that, so 0 it is.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. Every full-priced game released this year and last year has been an abject failure when it comes to AAA quality. When I pay $60, I expect top-notch AAA quality, and I expect even better if a studio dares to charge me $70. Finally we have a game that can deliver on that for the most part, at least with the standard stuff like graphics, animations and detail. You compare this to low quality trash like Wukong and SH2 Remake, it's a night and day difference. The overall quality of this game is better than anything released this year and last year (which isn't saying much). On top of that, this game offers a variety of missions with creativity, something so many lazy developers can't get right these days. They understand it's the developers' job to make the campaign fun, not the players' and I appreciate that. This game has some good set pieces. So what went wrong? This game is online only. You see what I mean Metacritic, I find a game that had the potential get a non-negative score from me and the greedy developers still find a way to mess things up. And your mods want to mess with my reviews for giving out negative scores. Like how is any of this my fault? ● Every COD game this generation requires internet, so it should come to no surprise that this game requires it as well. While I absolutely despise disc games that require internet to download (especially if it's singleplayer only), it doesn't bother me anywhere near as much as online only games. Because once I download the game, I can play the offline modes whenever I want. Well this game doesn't have any offline modes. Everything is now always online. So I had to rely on the developers' awful servers to play the campaign. I was disconnected multiple times from the campaign. And the developers' pathetic excuse was to prevent the game from having a huge file size. Even if we look past the always online aspect, the campaign is still trash in many ways. You can't enter vehicles in real-time. In MW2 (2022) you can hijack vehicles in real-time and the protagonist actually opens the door, so why can't these lazy developers animate the car doors to open? The vehicle physics are terrible, it feels exactly like a shovelware mobile game. MW2 once again did a better job with the vehicle handling. Look I'm fine with arcade driving mechanics, but it needs to be momentum-based, which this game lacks. ● As I mentioned earlier, there are no offline modes. So once the developers decide to shut down the servers, this game will end up in the trash can. Charging $70 for a game with no offline modes is a cash grab. The multiplayer is trash. One thing that's worth pointing out is that the online multiplayer worked and it was playable at launch. The reason I'm pointing that out, there are lazy developers out there that can't even get an offline singleplayer game to work at launch, I'm looking at you Bethesda and CDPR. But then again, this game has no offline modes. You see what I mean, these lazy devs keep taking shortcuts. The maps are garbage. The online gameplay is too fast-paced and the omnimovement makes it worse. Zombie mode is an improvement from the previous game but it's trash. But it's also worse at the same time, since it lacks offline. Back to ranting about the campaign, you can't pick locks in real-time, all you get is a Bethesda 2D minigame for it. You can't play the piano in real-time, nor touch the keypad in real-time. Melee combat is horrible. When I stabbed an enemy on the head, his body magically spawned upside down. Hitman physics in a nutshell. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. Toy-collecting millennials are praising this game because they claim it's impressive for a studio's first ever AAA game. This game does not impress me in the slightest, it is the exact garbage I would've expected from a studio's first AAA game. They chose one of the laziest game designs imaginable, and that's soulslike gameplay. That way, the greedy developers don't have to worry about accurate AI, enemy placement or level variety. All the lazy developers do in soulslike games is buff up the enemies and call it a day. And nerds are debating whether this is a soulslike game or not. I can't believe you nerds have a hard time classifying a game you claim to enjoy. It's not entirely a souls game, but let me put it this way. If you spend more time dancing than hitting, then it's a soulslike game. This formula is getting old, all you do is learn the enemy patterns and dance, it's a dancing simulator. It's like these developers listened to that Tones and I song and went like "Hey, let's make a game about this." The environment design is just a bunch of plants, trees, rocks and water, so it's not like the devs had to put much work in the environments. ● Speaking of putting work into the environments, there are too many invisible walls. They're literally everywhere. You go to a clear open spot, there's an invisible wall. There's a stairway implying it's accessible, invisible wall. Even when you run through the intended path, there are invisible walls to the side. To make matters worse, there are invisible walls during boss fights. Even worse, I tried hopping onto a platform that looked accessible and I fell to my death. How was I supposed to know? Just give me directions or a freaking map, because I'm sick of devs wasting my time. I tried jumping off a cliff to test out the death physics and what do you know, another invisible wall. I finally found a cliff I could hop off from, and there were no ragdoll physics present. I even landed on a slope before falling off the cliff and surely that would change my position of falling, but nope. The protagonist was still standing upright while falling. The devs couldn't even do the bare minimum by adding flailing animations to the limbs while falling. The snow deformation is trash, it looks like I'm walking through sugar. This is literally a mobile game spray painted with AAA graphics. Awful hit boxes. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $60 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. Terrible boss fights. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The physics are beyond horrible. The only good thing in this game is graphics but why should I be impressed by that when these greedy developers were too lazy to add visible barricades for the invisible walls? I'm sick of devs cutting corners, and for that I can't give them credit for the graphics. I paid $60 for this trash, so I expect top-notch AAA quality. And I don't care if this is the developers' first AAA game, you charge me full-price, then I expect the same level of quality as any other AAA game by experienced developers. You can't compete with the big boys, don't you dare charge me the same as them. Yeah I was impressed by this game alright, I was impressed at how lazy the developers were, that they couldn't even get the speed right when you destroy props with the sword, a basic detail nearly every studio can get right. Everything breaks apart so slowly, does this take place in another planet? What kind of stupid gravity physics are those? I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $70 for a game that is inferior to the average Ubisoft game on the PS4. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. The facial animations are trash and the protagonist's face looks like it was made out of clay. You can't even swim in this game. First Skull and Bones and now this? What does Ubisoft have against swimming these days? The mo-cap must've been done by a 5'10 man, because half of my punches aren't even connecting when knocking out people. Speaking of height, it's ridiculous that a skinny 5'5 woman with twig arms can knock out a bunch of grown men with a few punches. I literally knocked out a storm trooper with one bare fist, even though he had a thick full face helmet on. Are you freaking kidding me? She can also easily knock them down by grabbing their heads and faceplanting them. What the hell is the point of having helmets then? This is what happens when a bunch of feminists are developing your game. There are too many clipping issues, bugs and glitches. ● I remember during the launch week of this game, the "muh dark story" toy-collecting millennials kept roasting this game in the comments section of bug compilation videos. What a bunch of hypocrites, because all the bugs and flaws that were present in those videos (excluding the ability to swim) are still common in Witcher 3 to this very day, yet you nerds consider it to be one of the best games ever made. I've played both, and I can assure you that Witcher 3 has more bugs than Outlaws. Sure I didn't play Outlaws at launch, but W3 has been out for so long and it's buggier. All the clipping issues and mechanical glitches (like floating in the air) that you made fun of in Outlaws are more prominent in W3. "But W3 story is good" no, shut up. I'm only talking from a technical standpoint, and they're both on par with each other for their respective platforms. I'm tired of you nerds refusing to criticize the technical flaws of any game that is an internet darling. Because that's exactly why this game has all these bugs and glitches. It's no coincidence that this game had bad explosions right after BG3 won GOTY. Since BG3 had bad explosions and lack of fire spread in vegetation, of course Ubisoft was going to follow suit. ● There is nothing to do in the open world. It's just a boring and empty wasteland of plants, trees and rocks. They couldn't even get the arcade cabinet games right, that way I can at least say that the arcade games are better than the game itself. One of the arcade games is the typical "endless" runner where you switch between 3 lanes to avoid obstacles. The art style is lazy, it is just a bunch of green lines with a bit of yellow. The other one is pretty much another endless runner, but you shoot things and it's similar to the Star Wars arcade game from the 80s. Same art style, it's just a bunch of green lines, a bit of yellow and some orange stuff. Where's the color variety? Even Life is Strange: True Colors had better arcade games than this, with 2 different gameplay and art styles with color variety, unlike this trash where it's just a bunch of green lines with 90% of the black screen taking up the entire screen. You can't run over the pedestrians with your speeder bike, nor do they react to your actions. Instead, the bike magically clips through. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $70 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. The AI is incredibly stupid. The physics are beyond horrible. Everytime I crash my bike, the protagonist does that same stupid falling animation, regardless of the impact or speed. Why couldn't they give me ragdolls physics when getting ejected from a bike? The developers were too cheap and lazy for physics-based impacts. For goodness sake, why can't developers these days get the splash effects right in video games? Enough already. There's not a single AAA game from the PS4 and PS5 generation where you can get a splash from the water everytime you expect it to be there. The stealth system is atrocious and inconsistent, same with the stupid gun system. Space combat is awful. You can't pick locks in real-time. I don't recommend this game at all.
I am not done with you Atlus. The PS4 version is bundled with the PS5 version, as many cross-gen games are, so that entitles me to review this game one more time. And I thought the PS5 was bad when it came to the jaggies but the PS4 takes it to a whole new level, and critics want to give this game a 9-10? Look, I don't really care about what's popular or what the critics like. Take Taylor Swift for instance, so many weirdos are annoyed by her success and awards. Like why should I care? I'll just blast some ZZ Top, Scorpions, AC/DC, and ignore Taylor Swift's music altogether, problem solved. Her success has 0 effect on what I like. When journalists hype up a shovelware mobile game like this, then that's going to have an impact on the industry, especially if it wins GOTY. Look at the rippling effect that CDPR and BG3 has had across the industry, now we're getting a bunch of unfinished games or indie quality at full price. Video games are supposed to be evolving. They're evolving alright, they're evolving backwards. And it's only going to get worse from here if this game succeeds, because most developers will follow suit and produce low budget shovelware at $70. ● One thing I'll say about Atlus is that they're smart for not wasting a lot of money to please a bunch of nerds. This is clearly a low budget recycled piece of garbage. Good, because as you can see, critics and toy-collecting millennials are happy with shovelware trash like this. And it's funny because nerds keep hating on COD for being the same game every year, yet they're happy with this recycled Persona game. At least COD devs don't charge me $70 for something that could run on a console from 2 generations ago. You see what I mean, these nerds don't know what they want, so it's pointless to waste so much money to please them. But this is still a $70 game and I will judge it as such. I expect top-notch AAA quality. I want high quality graphics, advanced physics, insane level of detail, lots of content, high-end animations, a fidelity and performance mode, a guaranteed online PvP multiplayer experience with a matchmaking system, and I just want the devs to work hard. This game absolutely fails on everything I mentioned. If you can't deliver on that, then don't you dare charge $70. Start lowering your prices because there's no way this PS3 game should be $70. ● Speaking of the PS3, some of the things I mentioned were possible in PS3 hardware, like advanced physics and a PvP online multiplayer experience with a matchmaking system. And even then, there are PS3 games that can do a better job in multiple departments than this piece of garbage ever will, whether it be the attention to detail, animations or whatever. If this wins GOTY, then that's it for AAA games. We're getting nothing but recycled shovelware for $70 moving forward. The only thing that can save AAA gaming at this point is AI technology, since developers these days are too lazy and greedy to do the work. The AI does all the work and all the lazy devs have to do is revise it. No wait, didn't the GTA trilogy remaster use AI technology to upscale logos and the devs were still lazy to correct its mistakes? Nevermind, gaming is doomed. I hope the publishers' investment on AI pays off. ● P.S. Metacritic, I am entitled to review this game. Control your mods.
This DLC is a huge steaming pile of garbage. Now normally I don't buy DLC. I believe that when we buy a game at full price, we should be entitled to the full game. The only DLC we should be getting is free DLC and online updates. But I needed to see for myself if journalists and toy-collecting millennials were treating this DLC unfairly since they all hate Xbox and Bethesda. But I have to agree with them, this DLC is even worse than Phantom Liberty and Shadow of the Erdtree. Although it's still ridiculous that this got a lower score than Concord, proving you critics are generally Sony fanboys. This isn't even an expansion, the greedy developers are charging $30 for a GTA Online update. By the way Metacritic, the censored word I originally used in my Zelda Echoes of Wisdom review was the middle word of this DLC. It's not a bad freaking word, but I digress. This DLC does nothing new, it's just a few extra missions and that's it. Give me something else like new mechanics, improve the physics or the AI, anything. The gameplay is still boring and repetitive. There's still nothing to do in the "open" world. ● The DLC is around 5 hours long. I don't collect any stupid imaginary trophies, so don't you dare bring that up for the length. Like I said before, this DLC is more of the same. The new "planet" is just an empty landscape of rocks and more rocks. What's to tell about this game, it still has awful quality and terrible physics. Just update that trash engine of yours already Bethesda. How dare you charge me $30 for the DLC and still not let me enter and exist buildings in real-time. Loading screens after loading screens, this isn't 2004 anymore. It's embarrassing when you're backed by a trillion dollar corporation and you're still 20 years behind in technology. Speaking of technology, remember when Bethesda fanboys claimed that the 30fps cap was because of the scope of the game. Well that stupid theory was debunked by the 60fps update. Bethesda didn't give us a performance mode at launch because they were greedy and lazy. Same reason why we didn't get land vehicles from the start, greed and laziness. The driving mechanics are beyond horrible. Starfield is literally a PS2 game spray-painted with early XB1 graphics. ● There is still no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $70 and another $30 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. So that's $100 for the full experience without online multiplayer. What am I suppose to do after I beat the story, stare at rocks all day? God, you're so out of touch Todd Howard. I'm getting real sick and tired of this greedy trend of releasing paid DLC around 1 year later. I was fine with CP2077 and Elden Ring getting DLC because it took them a while to get it out (although the former's release window had more to do with the broken state of the game). But when I get story DLC 1 year later, you are deliberately cutting out content to get that extra money. If you're going to make story DLC, you better wait at least 18 months to release it or you're greedy. Or better yet, how about no story DLC at all? Because story DLC is just a lazy attempt to avoid making a new game. Why spend so much time and money developing a new game when you can just add a few sprinkles to an existing one and charge $30-50, or in TOTK's case $70. I don't recommend this DLC at all. ● P.S. Metacritic, put your mods in check. I have every right to express my opinion.
I'm not done with you Sony. When I first purchased HFW, I got the PS4 version instead of the PS5 version since the former also included the PS5 version for $10 cheaper. So of course I was going to get the PS4 version which I never reviewed, so that entitles to review this game again. To continue on with my rant, you better listen to me over the nerds, because I am the only gamer willing to be honest and consistent in the internet. We have too many fanboys, and they are guaranteed to be inconsistent. I don't fanboy any studio, I despise each and every one of them. When have I ever praised a studio? I don't say stupid fanboy crap like "Rockstar is quality" or "Insomniac is the best." I believe the only time I ever praised a studio was for the sole purpose of putting other studios down. Because they're all greedy and lazy. Am I perfect with being consistent? I have my preferences, just like anyone else. But the difference is I'm not suddenly going to praise Forza Horizon 6 if it becomes a 2D turn-based game with no multiplayer, just because critics and YouTubers like it. You dare charge me full price for that, then that's a great way to get a 0 from me. ● Toy-collecting millennials on the other hand are inconsistent and will praise anything that's an internet darling and refuse to say anything bad about it, even if it goes against their beliefs. But when it's a studio they resent like Ubisoft, they're willing to be honest. Speaking of Ubisoft, look at the hate Outlaws is getting. Their complaints are exactly like mine, they just refuse to do the same for the internet darlings. Nerds ranted about how bad the explosions look in Outlaws, yet these hypocrites had nothing to say about BG3's explosions looking worse. And just to prove how inconsistent these nerds are, they will praise Echoes of Wisdom in spite of the mobile game quality. But the second that same game has a GameMill logo with a licensed character like Xena instead of Zelda, then these same buffoons will hate the game and be honest about it. ● Whenever people rant about the downfall of gaming, you have nerds using the "play indie games" rebuttal. Dude if I only wanted to play indie games, then I would've never gotten a PS5 in the first place. I remember when you nerds threw a fit when Sony gave us indie games instead of AAA games on PS Plus back in like 2016. Now all of sudden you care about indie games. Clearly you're all coping, because you thought Sony would deliver on their AAA arty farty movie games this gen. But now that Sony downgraded their quality with garbage like Rise of the Ronin and Stellar Blade, all of sudden you love low quality games and art style. Funny how you didn't have that same energy when Crackdown 3 came out. You clearly want AAA games over indie, otherwise Witcher 3 and GOW wouldn't be your top 2 games of last gen, stupid. Only 12 games I reviewed received a positive score, only 3 of them were full-priced, none were $70. Indie games aren't a problem, it's the fact not a single game is worth the $70. ● One thing you devs need to remember is that toy-collecting millennials are the vocal minority. You always see nerds online talking about getting the platinum trophy, having no friends and replaying singleplayer games. Does that sound like the majority to you? If the internet's opinion represented the majority, GTA V, Fortnite, and COD would all be dead by now while GOW and TLOU would be thriving. Oh wait, it's the complete opposite. The top 3 most played games on consoles for last year were GTA V, COD, and Fortnite. They still appear in the top 3 weekly charts many times. And many nerd games are basically dead. So why would you waste so much money appealing to nerds? They're happy with low budget mobile games like TOTK and BG3, so you better only appeal to the masses when it comes to big budget titles. From now on, I'll rant about nerds whenever it's relevant because they are ruining games. ● P.S. Metacritic, my way or the highway.
This game is still a steaming pile of garbage. The DLC is exactly as I expected, it's just another empty wasteland of plants, trees and rocks with a few LA landmarks that should've been included in the base game. There's nothing to do in the open world. I'm pretty sure I criticized how bad the facial animations looked in my PS5 review. Well looking at it again, it's quite impressive. But those eyes look awful, which make the facial animations look terrible overall. Playing the PC version of this game reminds me of how awful recent games have gotten, and that's what I want to talk about. We are witnessing the downfall of gaming with all of these unprofitable big budget games, layoffs, overpriced hardware, remasters and just flop after flop. And why is this happening? Because you're all out of touch. Mods, you're going to have to let me talk about this, because no one else is willing to speak the truth but me; the devs need to see this if they want any chance of success. ● First things first, nerd games aren't profitable. By nerd games, I mean any game that is an internet/critic darling and you get called a "contrarian" for hating it (very ironic coming from nerds who hate on Fortnite because it's popular). "But Sony's movie games sold 20 million units" while that's true, nerds forget to take into account the story behind that success and the budgets. When Sony first announced 10 million copies sold for GOW, I remember seeing stacks of GOW games flooded in the $10 bin. So many casual gamers I know didn't buy Sony's arty farty movie games until they were deeply discounted. That was the appeal; you get a "10/10" game for a low price. Let's also not forget the bundles inflating the sales. "But COD, FIFA and RDR2 had bundles too" RDR2 was only a Pro bundle and the other 2 weren't standard bundles, stupid. Even if they were, third party studios get paid for the bundles. Sony loses money from their games if they get bundled, especially during the PS4 gen when it was basically a free game. Do I even have to talk about PS5 games like SM2 and HFW not being profitable? I've made my point Sony, stop wasting so much money on nerd stuff that isn't profitable enough. ● If you want to make games profitable, then you have to appeal to a more casual/mainstream audience, and you can start by giving us multiplayer. "But Concord failed" Live-service is not the answer Sony, it's a little too late for that. All you have to do is add multiplayer in your singleplayer games like you did with TLOU1 and Uncharted 4 (before the lazy devs took them out of the PS5 editions). Stop being greedy and lazy for online. Every full-priced game should have online multiplayer, no exceptions. I know I said I'd be fine with no multiplayer in HFW if the game had so much depth and content, which isn't the case. That was me trying to be generous. And by fine, I meant you would've gotten a 6 from me at best. Do you really think I would've been happy with just half the game when PS3 open world games like RDR, Saints Row, GTA, Far Cry all had multiplayer? Hell no, especially when you increased the price to $70. How can you expect me to be generous when you get greedier? From now on if you dare give me half the game for $70, the highest you can get from me is a 5. Half the game; half the score, that's how it's going to be. ● You should never listen to toy-collecing millennials. I need to be more specific about that term, because it seems that collecting toys is a thing with that generation. I can't say for a fact that all millennial sports fans collect toys for instance, but if you're a gamer with the typical "muh dark story, Witcher 3 and Elden Ring are the best games ever; Fortnite/COD bad" opinion, then it's a fact that you are a millennial with toys in your room. That's why I call them toy-collecting millennials. Basically nerds, but I don't see any other generation having this weird "GOW good/COD bad" superiority complex. Some Early Gen Z and Xennials nerds act like this too (same difference). You wasted so much money to please these dimwits with trash like GOW, and it was all for nothing since they're now happy with low budget shovelware like BG3. You see, they don't know what they want. That's why you don't listen to them. ● P.S. My way or the highway, Metacritic.
This game is a steaming pile of garbage. I vaguely remember playing this game. This must've been one of those games that I played for under an hour and never touched it again. I don't know, I had way too many games and I was a very busy man to play them all, not to mention I preferred watching movies than playing video games during those times. Besides, most of the games I bought during the PS2 era were for the kids. I checked to see if I still have the copy, and oh boy do I have another Timesplitters game to rant about, but first I'll start it off with this one. I can see why I might've played this trash for under an hour, because it's so boring and repetitive. The quality of this game is too poor for $10, even by PS2 standards. It looks and plays like a PS2 tech demo. Seeing how this game came out in 2000, it must've been a PS2 launch title. The greedy developers are charging $10 for a PS2 tech demo. PS2 tech demos and late PS2 games shouldn't cost the same. This should be $5 or less. Lazy developers didn't even bother to make reloading animations, so they hide the gun during reloading in a pathetic attempt to not animate the hands. ● The local multiplayer is trash. One thing I'll say about the local multiplayer is that at least it's there. It's already bad enough that developers these days are too greedy and lazy for online multiplayer, but they can't even add local multiplayer at the very least. Not that local is good enough, I still demand online from every full priced PS5 game. But if you can't do online, what's the excuse for local when a 2000 game can do it? It just proves how greedy and lazy devs are. Anyways, this game feels too outdated, it feels like N64 GoldenEye and that's just pathetic for a PS2 game. The gunplay is terrible and so is the player movement. The campaign missions are lazily designed. The graphics are an eyesore and the textures make me want to puke. I don't recommend this game at all. ● P.S. Metacritic, I see you have two types of mods. On one hand you have mods that can tolerate my opinions, regardless if they agree with it or not. On the other, you have a bunch of toy-collecting millennials believing that internet darling games should only get positive scores from users. That's not how it works. It's my opinion and I have every right to express it. It is up to me to decide the score ****, not the mods. I can definitely tell it's the same mod messing with me again. Listen up, you toy-collecting millennial. You think you're accomplishing anything by deleting my reviews? You are inadvertently giving me an idea of how Metacritic's system works based on your actions. You think Metacritic and the rest of the mods are going to be happy about that? I'm warning you, whatever you're trying to accomplish will completely backfire. I can say whatever I want. Of course not literally anything I want, I know where to set my limits. But it's my choice on how I want to write my reviews. So I'm posting my reviews over and over again. Got a problem with that? Deal with it because I'm not giving up.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. The Jak and Daxter series is one of the many reasons why it's embarrassing to be a gamer. You play as some weirdo with elf ears and a goofy hairstyle accompanied by a deformed looking weasel. When I first seen these two characters advertised in a manual, I ripped their page into pieces because of how cringeworthy they look. And then these nerds wonder why Naughty Dog abandoned the Jak and Daxter series. Well yeah, the sales kept plummeting after the first game. No normal person wants to play as these weird looking characters. And let's face it, the only reason why this series ever saw the light of day was thanks to Sony's marketing and mass-produced copies hogging the shelves. I'm glad ND moved on from this cringeworthy trash. Then again, I think I'll take this series over any of Naughty Dog's arty farty SJW movie games. Now on to this game, the gameplay is awful. The levels are boring and repetitive. The characters are so freaking annoying and the dialogue is cringeworthy. Dude, I wish I could punch Daxtar in the throat so he could shut up already. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Sure the original didn't have multiplayer, but there isn't a single rule dictating that they can't add multiplayer. What else is there to say about this horrible game? This is just your typical PSP trash. To elaborate, the typical PSP game is just an inferior version of successful PS2 games, usually made by a no-name studio rather than the studio that made the series popular. These games are usually more bare bones and scaled down when compared to the successful PS2 games. Speaking of the PS2, the lazy developers gave us the PSP version instead of the PS2. Usually (if not always) the PS2 version is superior than the PSP in terms of graphics. Now I don't know that for a fact when it comes to this game as I didn't play them on the original hardware, but I know that WWE and sports games looked better on the PS2 than the PSP. So pretty much we're getting the inferior version on PS5 hardware, which proves my point that video games are going backwards. And these greedy developers want $10? That's the same price of many PS2 classics. PSP classics should be cheaper. I don't recommend this game at all. ● P.S. Metacritic, control your freaking mods. I have the right to give my opinion on any games.
There was definitely fun to be had with this game. The driving mechanics are very satisfying for an arcade racer. The visuals look outstanding for a $50 game. The attention to detail this game offers is exceptional. The way the body shell of the monster truck deforms is stunning and very detailed. The detail looks good on the tires when it gets covered in dirt. The circuits and arenas are nicely done, although I would've liked a bit more variety regarding the circuits. $50 is a bit too pricey though and I expect more content from this game at that price. The customization for example is weak, like why can't we have custom liveries like in Hot Wheels Unleashed games, and this by the same studio mind you. The drifting mechanics are fun. There are a good number of trucks and variety, from the legendary Grave Digger to that quirky looking lobster monster truck. The stages are great. ● To be honest, I'm only reviewing this game because I need an excuse to not give a game a negative score so these mods can stop lurking on my profile. I knew that the second I negatively reviewed an internet darling game that's "exclusive" to PlayStation, I'd attract attention from the Metacritic mods. You toy-collecting millennials are so predictable, so I bought a game from Milestone to prepare for this moment, because their games are usually decent enough for me to give them anything but a negative score. This game was able to deliver on that, but this game has several flaws that doesn't sit well with me which is why it won't get a positive score from me. The collision detection is garbage. It's inconsistent and it's just ridiculous that tiny rocks outside the circuit or slight bumps sends my truck spinning around. Silent Hill 2 remake also suffered from bad collision detection with the melee weapons and glass. You see what I mean, how do you expect me to give positive scores when lazy developers keep messing up on the most basic things? How is any of that my fault? ● This game offers an online multiplayer experience of up to 8 players and there is also local multiplayer for 2 players. Freestyle was fun online. Online racing was fun, although it's disappointing there aren't any bots to fill up for missing players. I need bots because let's face it, this game is niche and it might die off sooner than later. Luckily there is crossplay to combat this issue and extend the lifespan of this game. So far I had no problem finding players, the most I waited was 2 minutes. The most fun I had with the online was treasure hunt mode. Now that was a lot of fun. The physics-based system is detailed in some areas but there are instances where it reacts poorly and janky, but it was hilarious seeing my opponents lose control and fall off cliffs with these physics. Overall, the game was enough to get a 6 from me. That's pretty much all I have to say, now leave me alone Metacritic. This is the last time I look for an excuse to give a game a specific score for the remainder of the year. I give my honest opinions, that's that. But it looks like the mods have been dealt with, so thanks to whoever put them in their place. Currently $40 but I would recommend at $30.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $70 for a remake of an off-brand Resident Evil game. Truthfully, I did not enjoy the original Silent Hill 2 on PS2 at all. It was boring, and I was hoping this remake could improve the gameplay. The remake is boring and repetitive as well. All you do is walk around and occasionally hit monsters with a plank, and later guns. I fail to see how any of this is remotely fun. There's no strategy to it until you encounter bosses, which are terrible. If you see a monster, you shoot it down or attack it with a melee weapon, stomp on it and that's it. No detail, no physics, no strategy, no nothing. The combat system and animations look janky, it literally looks like a GameMill game. I remember months before release, nerds were ranting about how bad the combat and animations looked. But now that the critics said good things about it, it's an internet darling. You toy-collecting millennials are a bunch of mindless fickle sheep. Literally nothing has changed from the trailers. "But the story is good" what the hell does that have to do with the awful gameplay? I thought the story was trash anyways. ● Just like the studio these developers are ripping-off (Capcom) this game lacks the attention to detail you would expect in a AAA game. You cannot open drawers in real-time. Are you freaking kidding me? Instead, the drawers magically open themselves and you can't even grab the items in the drawers accurately in real-time. Games like RDR2 and TLOU2 were able to pull this off in a PS4 console for $10 less, so there's no excuse as to why this $70 PS5 game can't add these basic details. Even PS3 games like TLOU1 allowed you to at least open the drawers in real-time. That is embarrassing. You can't open the cash register in real-time nor can you grab the money in real-time, again these are basic details that a PS4 game like RDR2 can get right. When you "grab" things, the camera cuts to your hand holding the item in a first person perspective. You might as well just make the whole game in first person, because the camera is too close for melee combat. I understand why they use it for tight corridors, but what about outside? Let me change the field of view. I'm sick of devs adding over-the-shoulder cameras just because they think it makes it arty farty. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $70 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. If there's one thing that desperately needed a remake, it's James' haircut. I don't want to play as a weirdo with an emo haircut. Just because Resident Evil has emo haircuts, the devs have to rip that off too? Imagine if Nathan Drake had an emo haircut. Oh hell no. This is just one of the many reasons why it's embarrassing to be a gamer. The physics are beyond horrible; literally GameMill physics. I smashed a window with a weapon and the glass broke PS2 style. When I hit the side panel of a cargo van with a plank, the side window magically breaks. Same thing with the freaking TV, lazy devs don't want to code proper collision detection for the glass. And that's also a problem with the combat system, my moves aren't even connecting and somehow the monsters magically fall down. And there isn't a wide variety of monsters to justify such bad hit detection. The AI is incredibly stupid. Voice acting is terrible. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. The greedy developers are charging $40 for a Goat Simulator clone. Goat Simulator 3 was $30, so guess what? I expect this $40 game to have better quality than Goat Simulator 3, but it's the other way around. Goat Sim 3 absolutely destroys this game in every category imaginable, whether it be the graphics, physics, interactivity, depth, detail, content, AI, customization, map design, quests, literally everything. All of that for $10 cheaper at launch. And what does this worthless trash get you for $40? There are only 12 outfits for the customization. Are you freaking kidding me? You can't choose what to wear for the head, body and feet like you can in Goat Sim 3, so that means only 12 customization options for Patrick. How dare you hype up the customization on the back of the game case, but only give me 12 options in total. Goat Sim 3 has more depth and stuff to do, like you can enlarge and duplicate things. Then you can put that stuff on a chassis and drive it around, I mean the possibilities are just endless while this garbage has nothing of that caliber. ● There is nothing to do in the open world. The map is too freaking small. You can't go inside any of the buildings. The developers were so lazy to add interiors, they couldn't even make an interior for the cooking minigame, so they put all the cooking equipment outside of the restaurant instead. I understand the Spongebob cartoon is completely inaccurate when it comes to the scale of interiors, but they could've at least added those fake Bethesda interiors or maybe even the lazy interior design of Nintendo games like Echoes of Wisdom. But no interiors at all. The developers were too cheap and lazy to come up with creative quests regarding the core gameplay mechanics, so most of them are just a bunch of minigames. These moronic devs don't even know what a demoltion derby is. It's when cars crash into each other for goodness sake. Speaking of which, you can't even get hit by a car (a boat; same difference) in a game that is supposed to be physics-based. The physics are trash. The gameplay is boring and repetitive. There's nothing interesting to discover or interact with. ● There is no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there is literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $40 for a game with no replay value is cash grab. These lazy developers couldn't even do the bare minimum by adding local split screen, something Goat Sim 3 was able to achieve for $10 less. "Nobody plays split screen anymore" my grandkids do. As a matter of fact, I remember one day as I was passing by my hallway, I heard echoes of laughter and excitement coming from my theater room. And as I check, I find my grandkids and the neighbor kids having a blast playing Goat Simulator 3 with four player split screen. And here we have a similar game, so surely they would've had fun playing split screen with this one, especially since kids love SpongeBob. Look, if you devs want to be greedy towards us adults, go ahead and do it, but how dare you do that to the kids. I've never seen a kid who doesn't want to play with friends and I've worked plenty of odd jobs and owned apartments to know that. If you think this game is remotely decent, you have not played Goat Simulator 3. Because if you did, you would understand why I hate this piece of garbage. I don't recommend this game at all.
This game is a huge steaming pile of garbage. This isn't even a game, this is a movie. The greedy developers are charging $60 for a remaster. This should've been a $10 upgrade for owners of the original. "But this is a remake, not remaster" no, it's a freaking remaster. I understand this isn't the same type of remaster as TLOU2 and Ghost of Tsushima, both of those should've been free upgrades by the way. While this game does have certain things built from the ground up, it's the exact same thing as the original for the most part, making it a remaster. You can't call this a remake when it's not fully built from the ground up like the Crash N. Sane Trilogy. If you don't know what to call it, let me coin the term. This is a rework, which is just a glorified remaster. It's called Until Dawn, yet this version starts off at dawn. In some ways it actually looks worse. I don't remember the facial animations looking this bad. On top of that, the game runs at 30fps while the orginal can run at 60fps on PS5. Not only does this game add a few new scenes, it also has new bugs and glitches. This game crashed twice. It's boring and repetitive. The physics are trash. Some characters look older. ● One thing that frustrates me about Sony is that they waste so much money on the most pointless things imaginable. Witcher 3 and Fallout 4 are proof that you don't need to waste so much money on remakes to get a sudden resurgence from a live-action adaptation. People like what they watch; they'll buy the game, it's that simple. Sony is only remaking it because they want to inflate their ego. They want to be seen as the best when it comes to graphics and quality. This is why Bloodborne is not on PC yet, even though the fans asking for it would be happy with just a simple port. Sony, you already ruined your reputation with Concord. "But they're still good at singleplayer games" Oh trust me, that reputation is going to die off sooner than later, so cut it out already Sony. I'm all for games having high quality graphics, but you have to spend that effort on brand new games. If you think about it, we have yet to get a brand new Playstation "exclusive" this generation with AAA quality. For PS5 AAA games, it's been nothing but copied and pasted sequels, tech demos, and remasters. As much as I hated the PS4 gen, at least we did get brand new AAA games like HZD, GOW, Uncharted 4 and more. ● There's still no multiplayer. So once you beat the story, there's literally not a reason to play this game again. Charging $60 for a game with no replay value is a cash grab. Maybe this game could've been fun if it had a Friday the 13th mode or Team Deathmatch, but the developers were too cheap and lazy for that. There's a reason why other studios don't release "remakes" for their more recent games, because these type of "remakes" are not cheap to make. This is a huge waste of money and resources. If you combine this with TLOU1 reworked and Spider-Man 1 remastered, then that's easily over 100 million dollars flushed down the drain. That's enough money to develop a whole new AAA game. Let the past be the past and start making new games already. Do you really think casuals would be like "Bruh I'm totally not buying Until Dawn 2015, it looks like a PS2 game" no, stupid. You got to learn how to leave well enough alone, Sony. Lazy devs don't want to work on new AAA games these days. And why in God's name is Sony making a movie about Until Dawn when it's already a freaking movie? I don't recommend this game at all.
And speaking of always online being a problem, this game is proof of that. Everyone and their mother knew this game was going to die prematurely, but a 2 week lifespan? Jesus freaking Christ. While most toy-collecting millennials are against always online, I still see nerds saying "it's not like they're shutting it down right away" bet you're feeling pretty stupid right about now. This is why I'm against online only games that have a price tag, because the greedy developers could shut it down at any time. A day after the shutdown, I remember seeing a copy of it in a store. I'm good friends with a retailer there, so I told him about the shutdown and asked if I could borrow the copy for a bit. He agreed to it as long as I reseal it. And I bought him lunch for letting me borrow it, so it's almost as if I paid for the game, so that means I have the right to review this garbage. I put the disc in my console to check for any offline modes and none were present. So I resealed this trash and returned it. It's literally unplayable, so that's enough to give this game a 0. Basically I'm done with my review, so how about I rant about this being a flop instead. ● I did however play the beta, and it was boring and repetitive. The greedy developers had the audacity to charge $40 for an off-brand Overwatch. Since Overwatch 2 is free-to-play, of course this was a guaranteed flop. Even if it went free-to-play, it still would've flopped because of the ugly SJW character designs. There's this narrative going around that the game's budget was around $400 million and apparently the credit's length is proof of that. Oh God, you toy-collecting millennials can't think, can you? You do realize that the only reason why Sony is doing live-service in the first place is to fund their arty farty movie games, right? Because these arty farty movie games cost too much to make and aren't profitable enough. There's a source claiming Concord had less than 2000 people on the credits while RDR2 had over 7000, and I doubt the average Concord dev got paid as much as a R* dev. Why would Sony spend that much for a fundraiser? Think, stupid. But of course, it was still a waste of money. Sony, just put online in singleplayer games, that's all you have to do. Stop being so out of touch. ● This is easily the biggest flop of all time, because Sony can promote it on their store page as much as they want for free, and it still flopped. That's embarrassing. This is why developers need to stand up for themselves against the higher-ups, because the devs are going to be ones on the receiving end. This garbage is now a part of your resume. So yeah, I blame the devs and I always will. Because I doubt the higher-ups were like "Yeah, let's totally make it online only and make the characters ugly." No, you chose to make it online only because you're lazy. You didn't want to put in the extra effort for an offline mode. And when I look at developers nowadays, that explains the characters' design. I'm going to change my guidelines on how I review online only games moving forward. If you dare charge me $40 or more for an always online game, I will take away 7 points, meaning the highest you can get from me is a 3. So if for whatever reason an online only game is good enough to be a 7, it will be a 0. Always online games should be free. I don't recommend this game at all. ● Metacritic you have a problem with my new 7-point deduction rule? If the devs take away my right to own a game, I take away points. It's only fair. Remember, my way or the highway.
I am not done with you Rockstar. The online portion is also included with the singleplayer, so that entitles me to review this game one more time. I'm sick to death of R* saying that GTA V and Online are different games. That's like saying the campaign and multiplayer of a COD game are different games, no it freaking isn't. But I bet when you licensed the music, you told the artists that GTA V and Online are the same game, didn't you? I doubt you cheapskates paid them double. Or how about the sales number, I bet you included GTAO standalone purchases into GTA V's sales. Exactly, you only admit it's the same game when it's convenient for you. Same thing with the nerds; everytime they talk about GTA V, they only talk about the singleplayer and completely ignore online. Let's get this straight; GTAO is a part of GTA V, they are the same game. ● I could talk about everything wrong with GTA Online, but right now I want to prioritize on making sure the devs don't listen to the nerds regarding GTA 6. They ruined nearly everything about video games and I won't allow them to ruin the game that will probably have the biggest budget ever. Why waste so much money on nerds when they're happy with low budget shovelware like Witcher 3, BG3 and TOTK. One of main problems with this game is GTA+. I don't even care about MTX as long as It's possible to get whatever I want for free, but that's no longer the case. The greedy developers want to lock stuff behind a paywall. The developers are too cheap and lazy to optimize their games, PS4/XB1 version are unplayable in public lobbies. While the PS5/XSX versions are playable on public lobbies, the framerate is still an issue because like I said, these lazy cheapskates refuse to optimize their DLC updates. ● R* scrapped like 8 story mode DLCs for GTA V. Good, I definitely wouldn't be pleased with the DLCs because most of the content would've been free in GTA Online anyway. So basically it would've been $20-30 for each DLC to get a few missions and a stupid movie that would've been free on YouTube. No way would've I paid for that. The only people that would've been pleased with the story DLCs are the "muh dark story" toy-collecting millennials. And what has listening to them ever done for the industry? Layoffs, unprofitable games and no staying power. By focusing on GTAO, it became very profitable and gave GTA V staying power, whereas story DLC would've been a waste of money. While Take-Two announced layoffs, I didn't hear anything about R* layoffs. You see devs, it's good business to ignore the nerds and simply pay attention to numbers and the analytics (but you're also lucky there's no direct competition). Then again, I would've liked a story DLC since the greedy developers charged money for this trash when it should've been a free upgrade. Let Larian cater to the nerds instead and watch them be an example of digging their own grave. ● Now let's talk about the GTA 6 trailer. It's not enough to tell whether the game will be garbage or biblical, but so far I am pleased with the direction its heading if the trailer is anything to go by. There wasn't a single thing arty farty or nerdy about the trailer. It looks like R* are trying to appeal to the dudebros, normies, Chads, Staceys or whatever the nerds call these type of people. Good, that's what I want to see. You win nothing by listening to nerds. These "muh dark story" toy-collecting millennials will buy your game, no matter what. These bully-victims and journalists will praise a fantasy RPG or an arty-farty movie game over GTA 6, no matter what. They will spend more time collecting imaginary trophies than playing GTA 6 Online, no matter what. After listing all these facts, why would you be stupid enough to listen to nerds? Imagine wasting so much money on losers when they're easily pleased with low-budget trash like TOTK and BG3. If you even dare turn GTA 6 into an arty farty nerd-pandering game, I will rip GTA 6 a new one bigger than the San Andreas Fault. ● P.S. It's my way of the highway.
