fredhorrigan

Like Sea before it, Sunless Skies has some really good writing and atmosphere but the gameplay is about as fun and engaging as a screensaver. There simply isn't much to it, the combat is very basic and besides that the game has nothing but simple resource management, rng stat checks and waiting; mostly waiting since traveling from place to place will take up most of your playtime, and like Sea it just involves staring at you vessel while it chugs through a nice looking but ultimately featureless map. Cheats can make the experience bearable by speeding up the game and removing the need to grind but a game that requires one to use outside means to avoid playing has failed at being a game. Probably makes for a good LP assuming it's screenshot-only or highly edited.

Because making a generic AssCreed clone with all of the flaws and none of the (few) strengths wasn't bad enough, now we need to put in a slot machine mechanic into a single player game and also profit from a dude's death. Cancer. Absolute cancer.

A shallow skeleton ****, almost every feature is either shallow, poorly implemented or simply absent (spying? what's that?) Might be worth playing after a few years of patches and with a several dozen DLCs but right now the game offers nothing besides the novelty of naming a space empire after your favorite meme.

Just another "game" where you have barely any interaction and all you do is walk from point A to point B and interacting with the thing the game tells you to interact with so you'll be able to walk to point C while you choose between a handful of dialogue options that don't change anything. The story takes a page from Gone Home where it might look like it's some sort of supernatural mystery or something like that but ends up being a very mundane and very boring. SPOILER ALERT: There's no killer or supernatural elements, just a guy trying to spook people because he wants them to leave the forest because he doesn't want anyone to find his dead son's body and the two girls that go missing turn out fine. Don't pay money for this **** just watch it on youtube, or even better, watch something less terrible like a movie or a TV show.

I heard you just walk around and solve maze puzzles. I thought there was more to it than that, but there really isn't so I checked it out, but there really isn't. You wander around these okay looking but ultimately bland and soulless environments looking for the next maze puzzle to complete. The maze puzzles get somewhat more complex as the game goes on and every now and then there's so extra trick to them like having to look at the environment and/or look at them from different perspectives but most are extremely simple and all boil down to tracing a line from point A to point B. Also the worst part about the praise this is getting from journos isn't how it's being treated like it's good, it how it's being treated like it's art. Not worth $40, not worth spending time on unless you have absolutely nothing to do. Soulja Boy please save us from this indie hell.

It's a Bethesda game The shooting (and only the shooting, enemies are still bullet sponges on normal and up and melee is worse than New Vegas) was improved and the graphics are certainly better but just about every flaw you expect from a bethesda game is here is one way or another, joined by a dumbed down conversation system that limits you to 4 choices that are almost completely identical most of the time and a building system that's acceptable for building a player house but extremely shallow when it comes to building settlements (settlers being invincible unless killed by the player doesn't help). Fallout 3.1/10

This game uses the "doge" meme multiple times. The dialogue makes repeated uses of smileys. Enemies sometimes exclaim "This is so OP" when being hit. If this isn't enough to warrant never touching it, you'll be pleased to know that the gameplay consists of one of the most shallow SRPG systems ever created. The parts where the rangers fight in a mech are basically 10 minute long QTEs (with one type of QTE, (namely "stop the slider"), a crafting system that heavily depends on RNG (in a game where you can't replay levels, so if you don't get the component you need you're forced to give up or save scum) and plenty of bugs. Also did I mention it was released in 2015 and uses the "doge" meme multiple times?

The game is full of annoying characters who all try way too hard to sound witty and yet there is no swear recognition, meaning one would get no response for calling Whedon's character a **** mentioning another VA's brother is a cuckold, or just swearing at the game because the voice recognition is spotty (there is a way to control the game without voice recognition but the game handicaps you by making the controls clunky and requiring a character to read off your command before your units act it out. As for the game part, the game is only a few hours long and the combat is rather shallow with each of your 4 units having identical base stats and being able to equip two of four weapons (in addition to a weak pistol weapon) also the missions are heavily scripted affairs that leave little room for trying to be creative with the game's limited mechanics.

Mediocre flash-tier game that only got high marks because one of the people working on it has a bunch of connections with gaming journos. While this game might seem interesting for the first couple hours, the feeling that quickly sets in isn't terror, but the reality that the game is extremely shallow (geddit?) and far too restrictive when it comes to making progress, forcing the player to grind for a very long time if they want to stop using the starter boat.

Remember Broken Age? or Massive Chalice? Nice to know that Double Fine has enough time to crank out stuff nobody asked for instead of the stuff people paid them to make. Kotick was right.