sugarnite

I was bamboozled. Neither the drive-in scene nor the prehistoric scene made it into the movie. Instead, there is plenty of marvel-esque cringe one liners being delivered by a slew of good and bad actors who are all phoning it in. There are so many useless characters and pointless locations, it is genuinely confusing to wrap your head around. By the end, I was begging for something as dumb as Jurassic Park 3, or even Fallen Kingdom. This franchise is in dire need of a reboot.

The movie is probably not as bad as the rating I am giving it. After all, effects look good, performances are good, and fight scenes are executed well. The way I see it, those attributes can no longer excuse a drawn-out, directionless, retconning third installment that treats its plot and characters with very little care. What should’ve been the triumphant conclusion to a trilogy ended up being a “let’s get as much money as we can before this jig is up.” It is insane to look back on this trilogy and realize that there was no real plan for these films, and it clearly shows.

I was surprised by how much I did not hate this movie. Much like the prequels, there are baffling and senseless decisions being made. At the same time, interesting themes are brought up and never mentioned again. Unlike the prequels though, the little things are done right. Characters act like people, scenes look like they were directed by humans, and fights have dimension to them. Would probably not watch again, but it could be a lot worse.

It is a remake of A New Hope, but the pacing is completely off. There are numerous climaxes throughout the film that do little to further the story, and everything wraps up at lighting speed at the end. Initially, the mostly real sets and practical effects immerse you in this real, lived-in universe… then everything becomes a cgi festival without a single real-looking set or prop for minutes at a time. The characters are all immediate best friends, and it’s hard to relate to perfect characters. You don’t get to borrow character development from movies that came out 30 years ago, you have to build it in your own movie.

Beautiful cinematography, excellent world building, and interesting characters. Not much else. The story of this movie could be written out on a cinema soda cup without losing any detail. A lot of film time is spent on the effects, there’s really not a lot other than that. A wise filmmaker once said that a special effect is just a tool; a special effect without a story is a pretty boring thing. Unfortunately this film has sparked an entire generation of dudebro film enthusiasts who really only need strong visuals to be impressed.

Are replicants just like people? Why do they act so weird? We essentially get a barebones noir/action film with this somewhat interesting background that is never properly fleshed out. I wish that the film paid as much attention to its characters as it does its visuals. What we are left with is a run of the mill chase flick with one romance that has aged very poorly.

After seeing No Way Home, I thought that the MCU had nothing interesting to do. That may still be true, but at least I know that a director like Sam Raimi can elevate an otherwise unremarkable experience. All the signature campiness and excellent cinematography is here, and Raimi has clearly not missed a beat in the decade since his last directing gig. The movie still suffers from what the other MCU films suffer from: bad plot devices, 2D characterization, and inconsistent logic, but I think Raimi elevates the experience in ways no factory-filmmaker could have. The Marvel-heads that were expecting a more generic experience will be sorely disappointed.

I got the feeling that George Lucas heard that audiences wanted humor, and so he delivered in the opening sequence, as inconsistent as it may have made the tone. There’s an “are we really the good guys?” vibe that is never really set up or properly explained. In fact, most of what happens is never set up or even alluded to. Anakin wanted to be on the council? He wanted to be a master? When did this happen? I get the feeling that the prequel fans care a lot more about what happens than how it happens. Which is fine, but in my opinion, the “how” means a lot more when it comes to enjoying a movie.

Jarring dialogue, noticeable compositing, and awkward dialogue make this movie a different experience. Virtually no on-location footage makes the whole film seem like it was made by a robot, and the writing definitely doesn’t help that. There are some interesting references to films like **** of Dollars, but they are mostly superficial and do not capture the spirit of those classics. The film establishes concepts that would’ve been great to explore, but usually, just as soon as something interesting happens, it’s over.

The first ten minutes are likely to give anybody whiplash as you travel to at least six different locations while getting very little time to catch your breath. There are many things that are mentioned once and never explained as the movie continues moving forward at lightning speed. The last act is pretty good, as the objectives and key players are established and explained (mostly)- but without getting to understand the characters’ motivations, histories, and relationships, I was not invested. Doug Chiang’s brilliant concept work coming to life is what will stick with anybody who watches this.

Great action, compelling characters, and cleverness make for the most refreshing film experience I've had in a long time. Only qualms would be the sometimes Youtube-quality VFX and occasionally annoying line deliveries. Overall, I personally loved it, and I'd recommend it to almost anybody.

I love just about everything in this movie. It’s a heartbreaking, inspiring story told in three distinct segments. The music and beautiful cinematography elevate even the most mundane scene to excellent heights. I’m writing this review to anybody who has not seen the film. Definitely go see it.

There will probably never be a comic book movie villain as memorable or quotable as Willem Dafoe’s Green Goblin. Just an all around fun, gripping, and epic hero story.

Possibly the best Sam Raimi movie, arguably the best comic book movie. Great characters, incredible cinematography (all of the Sam Raimi sweeps and Dutch angles are present), and an iconic villain in Alfred Molina. If you haven’t seen it, go watch it, and keep your eyes out for the hospital scene. You’ll know which one I’m talking about when you do.

So many things in this movie are forgettable. I don’t remember a single interesting thing about anything in this movie. On the plus side, it is inoffensive. Probably an easy way to kill time if you’re with a child.

[SPOILER ALERT: This review contains spoilers.]

Any time I think of a “perfect” movie, this is about as close as it gets. It’s a perfect storm of acting, writing, and directing talent. I could go on about the various influences from great filmmakers from the 1940’s onward, but I think it’s best to just go into this movie without any thoughts.

Days of Future Past exists, we never needed this. It’s contrived, boring, and internally inconsistent. Nobody would be talking about this movie if not for the R rating. Seriously, try to find one review for this movie that doesn’t mention the R rating.

If you’ve never heard of Sam Raimi, or just prefer lifeless, washed out Marvel film #763, you can stop reading. This movie is the victim of far too many “baby’s first movie review” people who parrot worn-out one liners. Truthfully, this is the Army of Darkness of the Raimi Spider-Man trilogy. There’s goof, great set pieces, and almost perfectly fleshed out characters.

I get the feeling that this movie is a lot of people’s first 3 hour movie. That may be the reason for the outlandish praise. It’s not the best Batman movie, but there are images that stuck with me in ways that no other image in a superhero movie did. Elements of this are actually really good. Most of what you see is nothing new, but I think it’s worth watching for the little bit that is.

I’m not somebody who gets butterflies every time I see something I recognize from my childhood. If that’s you, stop reading. This movie is dumb, even by Marvel standards. Parts of the movie are shot and color corrected like a comedy movie. In fact, the whole movie seems like a 2 hour CollegeHumor parody. There’s a scene that’s supposed to be emotional that came across as comedic due to the sheer absurdity of the situation. Nothing is organic. Everything happens because a character decided to turn their brain off. Unfortunately, turning your brain off is also the only way to think of this as anything more than a forgettable Hollywood time-killer.

[SPOILER ALERT: This review contains spoilers.]