Worst beat-up game that ever made. The controls on PC version is ****, and the good things is only their metalcore music.

It looks the part but MY ****'s ****, no joke it's quite literally an unacceptable release entirely. I'm a 38 yo semi-hardcore couch gaming pro and I'm always looking past things here n there if the game experience isn't comprised to a point of having to deal with a poorly McGuiver'd together mess. (am i right?? us reasonable gamers have learned to accept & adapt)... This game titled Coffee Crisis looked, sounded n seemed like a simple homage to beloved childhood sidescroller-BeatEmUps of the **** I'm gonna say about this game is that "the hit detection isn't consistent or defined as it feels like there's a bubble of fuzz around your character and if you touch or rub enemies with this imaginary aura they at times react in various ways that seem like they've been **** EXAGGERATION, kicking, punching & spinning around with the coffee bag DOESN'T result in proper fighting game sounds n action :( ...and i still keep replaying it sometimes, thinking i was overly **** i begin with a fresh experience in mind and its never good, those moments cut **** experience of playing this game physically hurts :'(

By far, one of the absolute worst Beat-em-ups I’ve ever thrown down with. It’s intriguing art and concept is awash in a diarrhea ocean of: terrible design, completely random difficulty spikes and delayed inputs. There is zero depth to this game aside from mashing buttons and jumping during its constant onslaught of randomly grouped thugs and aliens. You can also throw an opponent but lining that up feels completely hit or miss and it’s a stupid thing to do in a crowd anyway because it freezes you in place to get mauled by the obnoxious mob. This goes double for the ‘special’ move either of the main characters can use because it drains your HP so fast, it’s another pointless and fruitless strategy. The pacing is absolutely murdered due to the very frequent enmasse of those swarms and there’s little strategy indeed when all you can muster to do during most of them is jump around frantically and hope your kick connects with... something... anything. The game tries to cover up its shallow gameplay with also randomized screen effects (which can range from simple temporary scan lines to a truly eye-bleeding red filter that makes discerning what the hell is actually happening onscreen near impossible. I just can’t believe what the flying f—- they were thinking with this overbearing and simply unfun design. Somewhat cool metal music and nice animations do not save it. I am not joking when I say “I want my dollar back!”