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If there’s a children’s story that should never be a children’s story, it’s probably Hansel Gretel. Taken away from their family and tortured by a witch in her candy-coated house, the two kids face an almost certain death but manage to work together to burn the witch alive. Now, that may not sound like the best kid’s book, but it definitely sounds like it could work as an R-rated horror comedy, especially one from Tommy Wirkola, the guy behind **** zombies in Dead Snow. Throw in people like Peter Stormare who love to ham it up in their roles, an action star like Jeremy Renner, Prince of Persia’s Gemma Arterton, and you’d think there would be no doubt this film would be tons of stupid fun. Well, instead of watching the two kids raise some hell on a group of witches, I felt like Hansel: being stuffed with pointless eye-candy until I could break free and burn this train-wreck of a film from my memory. Read the rest of the review at ****/2013/02/05/hansel-and-gretel-witch-hunters-is-a-mindless-action-comedy-without-the-fun-that-entails/

The tale of two star-crossed lovers has finally reached its conclusion. The unlikely romance of a human and a vampire has been at the center of pop culture since 2008 when the first Twilight movie was thrown into the wild, for teenage girls to attach themselves to like a bee to honey. What has been baffling for these past 5 years has been how these films have had the longevity they

Walking out of this film, I wrote a single line at the end of my notes for my review:

Going into The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (or The Hobbit, as I will refer to it for the purpose of this review) I had very low expectations. When Peter Jackson announced it would be three movies, let alone two movies where I had already felt the source material was being stretched, I cringed. I knew no matter what the reviews were, I

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If there was one movie in 2012 that I was most excited to see, it was Gangster Squad. The trailer had a distinct visual style that impressed me at the time, the cast could not have been any better, and it looked like a fun gangster film that would also be a great addition to the genre itself. Then when it was delayed to 2013 for re-shoots after the Aurora, Colorado shootings I was disappointed to have to wait until 2013 for this movie. Well, I

The one convention that gangster and mob flicks always associate with themselves is a capitalist society. Most of the time, these aren

Movies that try to convey religious material, are more often than not duds for me, because they rely on the belief of that religion. It

The legacy of Alfred **** lives on in his wide assortment of suspense films, some of which took their time to become classics, and others that became instant hits upon release. Psycho was one of his films that received mixed reviews critically, yet was adored by audiences, becoming a box office success for **** and ultimately maintaining itself as the highest grossing film of his career. The production on the film has been noteworthy for several reasons, such as the lack of studio support from Paramount, a change of style for ****, and battles with the Motion Picture Production Code. In ****, all of this is addressed and then this biopic of the master of suspense becomes a film trying to walk the line between fact and fiction. The world is introduced to a peeping tom, always watching everything, obsessed with blondes, worried about how his film is received, and married to Alma Reville (Helen Mirren) who acts more as a mother figure than anything else. Acting aside, the movie has but a few mere moments of entertainment before it slouches back into its attempt to craft a fictional life behind one of the greatest directors of all time, in an extremely boring fashion. Check out the rest of the review at ****/2012/12/01/****-was-apparently-a-perverted-worrisome-mamas-boy/

The world we live in today is infatuated with the spotlight, with the notion of being captured on camera at all points in time an ideal for some. We have television shows dedicated to this idea of

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With most biopics, the reason we are so interested in them is because they threaten to take their star down from his powerful placement in history, and show him as human rather than god. This year we get two hotly anticipated films which will attempt to do just that: **** and Lincoln. Both men have contributed so much in their respective fields that they are rarely seen in a bad light, nor are people ecstatic to see them portrayed as mere men. However, I can definitely say Lincoln attempts to show Abraham Lincoln as one of us, and not merely an icon placed upon an unreachable pedestal. With incredible acting on the part of everyone, but especially Sally Field and Daniel Day-Lewis, and writing by Tony Kushner that is both enticing and fitting for the period, Lincoln is a concrete example of how to make a biopic flourish while still being faithful and engrossing. Read the rest of the review at ****/2012/11/09/lincoln-scratches-his-beard-just-like-any-other-man/

Genres can be a constriction on a film, letting itself be restricted by boundaries set by the type of film it is. It is more often than not, the movies that defy their genre which intrigue and

Oh how advertising can absolutely ruin your excitement to see a film. Being marketed as a generic, run-of-the-mill horror film is the worst thing that can happen to you from a critical standpoint, but from a commercial point of view, there

The age of enlightenment is a milestone in history that has resulted in the world we live in now. Before, religion and state had overbearing control over what was seen by their citizens, and any inkling of free thought could result in a quick trip to the guillotine. Then a new era was ushered in, where books became more valuable than almost anything else. Information could be freely sought and learning to question authorities was encouraged. Yet, in some countries, this was (and still is) a discouraged notion. It took many nations years before the age of enlightenment could become mainstay, albeit to much hesitation. A Royal Affair is a portrait of this time, showing Denmark

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Remember the days of Daredevil, Gigli, and Surviving Christmas? The days when Ben Affleck was everywhere, doing many films a year, most of which turned out horrid? Turns out all it took was for him to step behind the camera and start directing his own films to begin a new career as a person actually worth talking about again. With Gone Baby Gone and The Town, he met critical success, and with Argo his trend of successful films continues. Adapting a true-but-absurd story for Hollywood can be difficult, but its playful nature about it as well as tension-filled moments equate to another milestone in Affleck

Other than Arnold Schwarzenegger, how many other body-builder movie stars do you know of? You know, those guys who look massive with the only purpose of their exercise being to win prizes for looking massive? Perhaps it

Earlier this year, an incredible and inventive action flick came out entitled The Raid: Redemption. It featured a team of police officers fighting through floor after floor of an apartment complex, showcasing a stunning masterpiece of editing and martial arts. Guns were used very little in the film, which gave it a more personal touch, and utilized music to build up fight sequences, which could last for about 10 minutes. Delivering suspense, expert editing, impressive choreography, and some brutal violence, the film quickly rose to critical success and is one of my favourite action films I

Looper is a film that could have spiralled out of control at any moment either with its introduction of new sci-fi elements throughout the first hour, or its slightly complex use of time travel which is the emphasis of the science fiction portion of this film. The reason nothing went into disarray is because it was expertly written, keeping itself grounded as much as it could while delivering the viewer with a world to sink its teeth into. What Looper does to surpass itself from merely being an incredibly visceral science fiction and action experience, is it delivers character development and individual moments that transcend what is already a pretty packed film full of interesting ideas and motifs. It's hard not to instantly compare the film to others such as Twelve Monkeys, Inception and even The Matrix, but I think that's what Johnson does best is pull the vibe from other films and source materials (he read a lot of Philip K. **** before writing this) then incorporate them into a film that feels wholly his own. Go to ****/2012/09/27/im-from-the-future-go-see-looper/ for the rest of the review.