Noelle

As a type of origins tale Noelle has plenty of charm—the kind that makes a Christmas story not just simply amiable, but worth a look.

Disney Plus’ original Christmas movie Noelle is like a recipe where all the ingredients are delicious, then realizing, once the dish has been cooked, that the flavors cancel each other out.

Noelle has a few of those peppermint hot chocolate moments, but thanks to its bizarre warm-weather detour and wasting of a stellar cast, it just barely makes the nice list.

Over all, Noelle is subpar — but it’s silly, harmless fun. It’s so forgettable it’ll be virtually erased from your memory five minutes after the end credits roll.

Marc Lawrence's story about Santa's daughter, despite its solid cast, aims squarely at not-too-picky kids and mostly ignores parents' desire to be entertained as well.

In holiday gift terms, it ain’t coal, and it ain’t a new car. It’s holiday socks, with a big ugly candy cane and some wavy text on it. Noelle’s cute for a minute, but you’re not going come back to this thing after January.

What you see a movie like Noelle, what the experience comes down to is: It’s something you’re not watching in a theater because most of us wouldn’t watch it in a theater. It wouldn’t be worth the effort. Whatever your idea of a sentimental connect-the-dots Christmas comedy is, this is sub that.

The thing about Noelle is that it's too predictable. From the very first scene you could see her expression, whenever she talked about Christmas, and how much interest and dedication she had, unlike her brother. It's enjoyable, but almost too cliche to be considered a "must-watch" or a Christmas classic in that case.

Noelle, now out on Disney+, is about the titular character who is Santa Claus' daughter (played by Anna Kendrick). Her brother Nick (Bill Hader), who is to become the new Santa, gets cold feet and goes missing. So, it's up to Noelle to find go out into the world and find him. Disney made this a couple years ago. It was originally going to be a theatrical release but got held back bringing on the rumors that the corporation didn't have much trust in it, and they they were probably right. Noelle is a rather stale effort. The general story on paper could've worked, but nothing about the script manages to stick the landing. The movie foreshadows how things will turn out pretty early on. Yes, a lot of successful Christmas films can be predictable, but it all depends on how it goes down and nothing of a whole lot of interest happens or is said. This is a fish-out-of-water movie, too, and I usually like those, but that aspect has even less to work with than the Christmas part. Usually good actors Hendricks and Hader aren't able to salvage the lines in this. I also found the film to be a little mean spirited. You're expecting the people behind Christmas to be optimistic, but the elves and even Noelle's mother end up being pretty petty to her. To the movie's credit, there are few good jokes here and there. (There's a good bit with a gavel.) I also appreciate that the threat to Christmas' future, Noelle's cousin Gabrielle (Billy Eichner) who wants to digitize and streamline the way the holiday is done, isn't portrayed as a true villain but in a more nuanced way as someone who means well but is misguided. I also felt the depiction of the South Pole Christmas town to be rather underwhelming. It feels a little mundane for the place where holiday magic happens. The buildings look like they're from a regular tourist town or a Hallmark Christmas movie. The outfits mostly look too much like regular winter clothes. And how much do fake elf ears cost? Because there seemed to be a lot of effort to keep ears hidden. Your kids may get more from this and be less discerning. The movie does try to provide positive messages and a story of female empowerment. As for adults, understand this isn't downright bad; it just doesn't feel an hour forty well spent. Watching felt like more of a task than a pleasure.

Because of the dates it will definitely be seen and more for being a novelty but for that same reason it will be discarded quite quickly, and it's that its quality and story don't justify anything more than its momentary entertainment. It's no longer difficult to believe Anna Kendrick peaked on Up in the Air.

Noelle is ALMOST cute, ALMOST fun, ALMOST enjoyable, but it just doesn't work. It doesn't help that in many places the description of the movie (even Imdb) is most if not all of the movie spoiled. This reinforces what I already suspected: Disney+ is a place to rewatch movies you probably already own and see new material that wasn't quite good enough for theaters or TV.

How do you do, young fellow millennials! r/fellowkids. This is one of the most cringy, predicable, boing movie I've ever seen.