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hangej

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May 31, 2026
Spider-Noir
3
User Scorehangej
May 31, 2026
Most importantly, it's a bland show. Nothing happens, the dialog and story meanders - and you end up still not knowing what's going on because it bores you to death. In one line: "Cheap meandering chaos that goes nowhere and delivers boredom". I wanna be clear, I am not a Zoomer. I have seen a fair share of old detective movies and shows (actually I am a fan). And I like the O.G. MCU stuff and Cage. So this should be my show. But it is the absolute opposite. Because this is a full-fledged disaster, let me be brisk: - Flat dialog and delivery - Line delivery of some minor characters are good and with an attempt to period adjust (kudos). But the rest mostly does plain flat colloquial modern English. - Boring plot development and delivery - Not faithful characters (race-swaps, china audience swaps, body positivity swaps etc.) - and as usual with these, these agenda actors bomb - Generally, this was created by acolytes of "The Message" ;) - Instead of a noir detective focus, this is some ensemble cast attempt that does not fit and adds to the meandering of the show - Cinematography is abysmal. People rant because "uh look black and white" but the shots are far too bright. The sets are horribly plain. In color you see it worse, but even in black and white - rain during the brightly lit day does not invoke a "noir" feeling. It's just rain dude. And why put a rain shot in that scene to begin with? To pad! Blade Runner is in color and far more moody and noir that this stinker. - This also means that the black and white (hype) is nothing else than a surface level trick in an attempt to elevate bad material and delivery - and it seems to work. Nothing else is done to elevate or match the material to the time - beyond the surface. So. Boring. Dull. Bad to look at (in color even worse). One of these typical modern "Could maybe be a movie, but we want to stretch it out for steaming" things, that usually ends up being a time waster. But somehow it seems to work to create a hype. So yea, the bad state of TV and movies continues. That said, better than any other Spider man since Sam Rami - I know of. Still very bad - and still has a "Message" stink to it.
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