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Summary With her life crashing down around her, Linda (Rose Byrne) attempts to navigate her child’s mysterious illness, her absent husband, a missing person, and an increasingly hostile relationship with her therapist.
Directed By: Mary Bronstein
Written By: Mary Bronstein
If I Had Legs I'd Kick You
77
7.7
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Summary With her life crashing down around her, Linda (Rose Byrne) attempts to navigate her child’s mysterious illness, her absent husband, a missing person, and an increasingly hostile relationship with her therapist.
Directed By: Mary Bronstein
Written By: Mary Bronstein
Where to Watch
Not available in your country?
ExpressVPN
Get 3 Extra months free
$6.67/mth
Top Cast
Metascore
Generally Favorable Based on 32 Critic Reviews
77
84% Positive
27 Reviews
27 Reviews
16% Mixed
5 Reviews
5 Reviews
0% Negative
0 Reviews
0 Reviews
Metascore
Generally Favorable Based on 32 Critic Reviews
77
84% Positive
27 Reviews
27 Reviews
16% Mixed
5 Reviews
5 Reviews
0% Negative
0 Reviews
0 Reviews
Feb 20, 2025
Bronstein crafts a thriller of teeth-grinding magnificence centred on Byrne as the indefatigable figure at the centre of this whirlwind of unsolicited advice.
Oct 9, 2025
Wrenching and at times suffocating, If I Had Legs I’d Kick You is a howl of maternal desperation spiked with jagged humor.
User Score
Generally Favorable Based on 29 User Ratings
7.7
79% Positive
23 Ratings
23 Ratings
14% Mixed
4 Ratings
4 Ratings
7% Negative
2 Ratings
2 Ratings
User Score
Generally Favorable Based on 29 User Ratings
7.7
79% Positive
23 Ratings
23 Ratings
14% Mixed
4 Ratings
4 Ratings
7% Negative
2 Ratings
2 Ratings
Nov 29, 2025
In an age where life’s everyday challenges can test our wits, becoming overwhelmed is a real possibility when they pile up. Just ask Linda (Rose Byrne), a therapist who struggles to sincerely and sensitively assist her troubled patients. But that’s just the start of her problems. She’s also tending to a sick child (Delaney Quinn), the demands of which are considerable, both from the whiny, often-unappreciative youngster and her annoyingly insistent caregivers. To make matters worse, a burst pipe in the ceiling of her apartment has forced mother and child to move into a hotel, a stay that’s become unexpectedly extended due to the lack of repair work by her inattentive landlord. And, through all of these ordeals, Linda is on her own, given that her unfeeling husband (Christian Slater) is frequently away on business. As a consequence, this palette of issues has forced Linda into therapy herself with a peer counselor (Conan O”Brien), whose incessant indifference not only offers little help, but also tends to exacerbate the stress in her life. Over time, the specific pressures associated with each of these incidents begin to snowball, making coping nearly impossible. And, as time passes, Linda feels as though she’s losing herself and descending into her own personal madness. So what is she to do? That’s what this intense offering from actress-writer-director Mary Bronstein seeks to explore. This exceedingly dark comedy-drama examines what a woman on the edge might go through as the breaking point approaches. There’s an undeniably raw, edgy, realistic quality to this release, one that sometimes makes this a decidedly uncomfortable watch. The barrage of challenges to simply get through the day keeps coming at the protagonist (and, hence, viewers) relentlessly, presented here in nonstop fashion at breakneck speed. And it seems that, no matter what good faith efforts Linda makes to resolve her dilemmas, they’re never enough, often exposing her to petty, undue criticism that, in turn, prompt undue, unfair and unfounded accusations of blame and shame. All of these foregoing attributes are routinely intensified by the picture’s regular use of macabre comic relief, serving up laughs about incidents and subjects that many of us might genuinely feel guilty chuckling about. But this film’s real standout asset is the superb performance turned in by Byrne, easily the best work of her career and handily worthy of awards consideration, capably backed by Quinn, O’Brien and other cast members in fine supporting portrayals. To be sure, “If I Had Legs I’d Kick You” won’t suit everyone, and even avid cinephiles may at times find their patience, tolerance and sensibilities sufficiently challenged. Nevertheless, this is one of those “sign of the times” pictures that unflinchingly exposes much of what’s wrong with contemporary society and that we’d all be wise to take seriously if we ever hope to see improvement in a world where a lack of compassion, understanding and support are being allowed to run rampant. It’s no wonder that so many of us might feel like kicking back under conditions like this. Indeed, maybe it’s time we should all seek to grow some legs of our own.
Report
Oct 17, 2025
"If I Had Legs I'd Kick You" is a downright harrowing depiction of motherhood beset by a string of personal and professional catastrophes that also explores the issues and challenges of anxiety and the world's lack of empathy. Mary Bronstein tows this line between serious problematic issues and finding the awkward humor of parenthood with a career best performance from Rose Byrne who captures the stress and exhaustion of every day life. In the grand tradition of the Safdie brothers and Ronald Bronstein’s corpus of anxiety-inducing cinema, Mary Bronstein gifts the world with her version of a relentless 114-minute panic attack with If I Had Legs I’d Kick You. Anyone well-versed in the realm of anxiety and panic attacks immediately knows the difference. Both are uncomfortable to varying degrees and at times unpleasant, yet one is far more accessible than the other. With her life crashing down around her, Linda (Rose Byrne) is attempting to navigate her child’s mysterious illness, her absent husband who is away on two work, a missing patient, and an increasingly hostile relationship with her therapist. Of course, not everyone cannot relate to the motherly day-to-day tasks of protagonist Linda (Rose Byrne), a therapist who tries her best to ensure her sick daughter (Delaney Quinn) is taken care of, while juggling a thousand different tasks just to get by, while her husband, Charles (Christian Slater), who is in the navy off in the sky. We don’t know what disease Linda’s daughter has, but it’s pretty serious—and advanced—bringing much stress to an already stressful, impossible life the mother has set for herself. The therapist (Conan O’Brien) she sees at the clinic she works at is completely helpless, and, most recently, she must now live at a hotel, as part of the ceiling from her apartment tore off. However, one can entirely grasp the anxiety she lives with and the utter panic she experiences daily. She wants to do right by her daughter and ensure she is taken care of, but it looks as if the world is out to get her and take her daughter (who doesn’t have a name and isn’t seen for the bulk of the runtime) away before she even has a chance to heal. Nothing’s going right, and nothing will go right by the end. In fact, the panic attack she feels intensifies to the point where Christopher Messina’s already erratic camera blurs and represents her imperceptible, chaotic mindset that, sadly, won’t die down anytime soon. Some try to give a helping hand, such as hotel superintendent James (A$AP Rocky) and Dr. Spring (Mary Bronstein), but Linda shuts both of them out and thinks she can do it all on her own. The truth is: she can’t, and it becomes increasingly apparent by the time the movie progresses. We’re always in close proximity to the protagonist, whether we want to be or not. The camera never looks away from her, even during conversations with other characters. Linda is always at the center of the frame and the focal point of attention of Messina’s lens. Being so requires a decisive turn from Rose Byrne, who delivers the best performance of her career. She's always had this in her and it's hard to believe what she had to tap into embody all of Linda's emotional turmoil. Yet, Byrne is so magnetic and heartbreaking that it’s hard not to see her walk away without at least one critics group award. The performances from the ensemble around Byrne is also phenomenal, Conan O'Brien is really good in this as this matter of fact therapist, he's always had this funny persona we've known him for but he was trained in theatre at a young age so like Stephen Colbert he knows how play a serious character with a straight face and make it convincing. Many could compare Bronstein’s feature to her husband Ronald’s collaborations with Josh (acting as an executive producer for this film) and Benny Safdie, "Good Time" and "Uncut Gems." This movie is shockingly more accessible and funnier and has a more reasonable pace than "Uncut Gems,' as she captured a true sense of anxiety in ways that no other filmmaker did with such artistic efficiency and a controlled sense of chaos. "If I Had Legs I’d Kick You" also explores the complexities of motherhood and the stress that comes with wanting to do what is always right for your children, even if the world seems “against you.” However, I was so taken aback by how well Bronstein nailed the feeling of never-ending angst as it mounts to a point of no return, in a final scene so devastating but also hopeful it may move you to tears, that everything else seemed futile in the context of a person who lives with anxiety daily. I'm glad Bronstein chose to end the movie on a positive note of Linda being embraced by her daughter because it is needed and feels earned after the events that transpired throughout the film. Life has its ups and downs, but when things start to go in a different direction than you’d hope, climbing back up is an even bigger challenge than expected.
Report
Jan 31, 2025
Mothers can’t leave, and when they do it’s considered to be the ultimate sin. Bronstein’s script is a brave, searing interrogation of the roles they’re forced to play in society and the massive weight of holding a life in one’s hands.
Jan 25, 2025
Through all this, Byrne’s high-wire act remains riveting, scrutinized for long stretches of the film in DP Christopher Messina’s probing closeups. It’s a bruising performance, digging deep into the intense pressure and isolation that can sometimes accompany motherhood.
Jan 27, 2025
Writer-director Mary Bronstein’s absorbing psychological drama about a mother at her breaking point is two hours of mounting anxiety and nervousness.
Oct 23, 2025
It’s an impressive performance by Byrne, who embodies Linda with unhinged pathos; however, it just as often felt like watching a spiral for spiral’s sake. But, perhaps, viewers with kids of their own may find comfort in the moments Linda vulnerably faces her sense of ineptness as a mother and wrestles with her responsibility for her child’s illness.
By Jas Keimig FULL REVIEW
Oct 16, 2025
It’s a daring choice to force audiences to spend 2 hours with someone they won’t like, but “If I Had Legs, I’d Kick You” is more of an experiment than an empathy machine. It overstays its welcome by at least 30 minutes.
Dec 5, 2025
One of the most interesting of the year. A24 returns to the territory it masters with remarkable skill—the intimate, atmospheric, and emotionally potent cinema that first made me fall in love with the studio. And it does so with a captivating proposal. The story is immersive, contemplative, and intense. The carefully crafted script manages to weave together everyday aspects of life, such as motherhood, work responsibilities, and family dynamics, without losing coherence. Mary Bronstein demonstrates a prodigious touch in directing, seamlessly connecting seemingly unrelated elements through parallels, metaphors, and dialogue. Rose Byrne is the central pillar of the performance, carrying the full dramatic weight of the film. Her presence sustains the work almost entirely, delivering an emotional intensity rarely seen on screen. A performance worthy of recognition and any possible nomination. The visual aspect naturally stands out. The cinematography, with its meticulous use of color and narrative style, reinforces the story and enhances the psychological depth, delivering introspective and emotional precision. 'If I Had Legs I’d Kick You' is exhausting and gripping. Without a doubt, it’s an experience no cinephile should miss. Spanish: Una de las más interesantes del año. A24 regresa al terreno que domina con maestría, aquel cine íntimo, atmosférico y emocionalmente potente que hizo que me enamorara de la productora. Y lo hace con una propuesta atrapante. Una historia envolvente, contemplativa e intensa. Un guion cuidadosamente escrito, que logra entrelazar cuestiones de la vida cotidiana como la maternidad, las responsabilidades laborales, familiares, entre otros, sin perder coherencia. Mary Bronstein demuestra una mano prodigiosa para dirigir y unir elementos aparentemente poco relacionados entre sí, a través de paralelismos, metáforas y diálogos. Rose Byrne es el pilar central de la interpretación, la cual aporta todo el peso dramático, que no es poco. La presencia sostiene la obra casi de manera total. Una carga emocional pocas veces vista. Digna de reconocimiento y merecedora de cualquier nominación. El apartado visual destaca, por supuesto. La fotografía, con un cuidadísimo tratamiento del color y estilo narrativo, refuerza la historia y contribuye al juego psicológico. Una precisión introspectiva y emocional. 'Si pudiera, te daría una patada' es agotadora y estremecedora. Sin duda, una experiencia que ningún cinéfilo debería perderse.
Report
Nov 19, 2025
Impeccable acting and direction keep the stress level in the 5–9 range for the whole of this nearly two-hour film. There are brilliant moments, but maybe not enough to merited such a taxing experience.
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Production Company
- A24
- Bronxburgh
- Central Pictures
- Fat City
Release Date Oct 10, 2025
Duration 1 h 53 m
Rating R
Tagline Everything is under control.
Awards
Gotham Awards
• 4 Nominations
Berlin International Film Festival
• 1 Win & 2 Nominations
Sitges - Catalonian International Film Festival
• 1 Win & 2 Nominations
