aznassassin

Officially cemented itself on my Favourite Comedies of All Time list. Ferrell is at his comedic best and the ensemble cast including a few uncredited cameos just bring it up even higher. Some lame jokes in one or two places that felt a little forced but ultimately, its a comedic excellence.

Could've been a lot worse but a surprisingly fun time with Hill and Tatum in this ridiculous buddy cop movie. Definitely not a comedy that you have to see or rent out, but its a decent one for a bored Friday night.

A highly solid sequel that tops the original in every way and form. The action is satisfying, the humour is timed well, the plot flows well and the violence hit the sweet spot between strong and sadistic. High recommended even if you didn't really have a thing for the first movie. Brilliant.

Brilliantly executed and acted all wrapped in outstanding special effects. I was on the edge of my seat for 99% of the film and had my hand covering my mouth for half of the movie (which often doesn't happen, even when I am watching horror films). A tour de force of a masterpiece by Alfonso Cuarón that will be in your head long after you've left the theatre. I foresee a few Oscar nominations and wins for this one. Go see this. Now.

This is absolute garbage. I was hoping this would at least be better than Resident Evil Retribution but my God, this is just a crime against your wallet. If you enjoyed this movie, liked its page on facebook and spoken about how you 'liked it' because of whatever ignorant, pathetic, childish reason you have then I will have to unfortunately send you off to the firing squad. The acting was mediocre, Jaden Smith is just not fit for a movie like this and the whole story is just plain-ass cliche', uninteresting, highly predictable and well, pretty much I was bored out of my mind watching this load of dung. You can pretty much just fast skip through the movie and jump scenes and you wont be missing out on anything at all. Just watch the intro, skip to the part where the ship crashes, skip to a random scene where Jaden is in some random encounter (there's tons in this movie) and skip to the predictable, lame-ass ending. Trust me, you wont be missing out on anything. This is not worth your purchase, your download bandwidth or your time. I'd rather be doing a uni assignment then watching this piece of Worst movie of the year and one of the worst movies Ive seen in a long while. I want my 90 minutes back.

Awesome fight scenes cant make up for a horrible shallow plot with elements that does not make sense, characters and settings that would offend anyone (such as myself) from a Chinese background and overuse of over-the-top violent kills that will make anyone, even those who want blood and guts, to flinch. This lack everything that made Tarantino's flick great and tries to be a westernized Wushia movie but ultimately fails on every level except for the at times decent fight scenes (however even these fall flat at times with horrible CG effects e.g arrows. blood, stuff breaking apart). With the exception of Russell Crowe and Lucy Liu, every other actor in this movie just fails on all levels of acting. There's a difference between knowing that its cheesy and bad and going for it vs being cheesy and bad but takes itself way too seriously. This movie is the latter and really, there are so many moments, especially the sexual scenes involving Crowe (dont get excited **** nudity here and no sex at all. Just connotations) which felt unecessary and do nothing to the plot. All-in-all, once you overlook these factors, you may enjoy Man with the Iron Fists when the blood starts spilling but overall, its is a horrible, Tarantino-wannabe movie that lacks art and class, and would more then offend anyone with Chinese ancestry or with a good knowledge of Chinese Wushia films. People who find this to be exciting and engrossing seriously need a reality check and are certainly young, ignorant, non-Asian **** with a lack of experience with Chinese Wushia films. It's like going to those made-for-White-people Chinese restaurants that only non-Chinese people go to: you know, those mediocre places where you never see any Asians dine there (there's a good restaurant tip right there) and the menu is cliche' as hell (fried rice, sweet&sour pork, spring rolls zzz) with customers ordering the same dish almost everytime as opposed to dining in a high class, popular restaurant known by all the Chinese locals for great authentic dishes. Many people will get tricked by its action and some reviews on metacritic by ignorant people who dont know better. If you are curious, watch it when you're drunk and bored with some mates. Otherwise, unlike you're really an ignorant, non-Asian **** who dont know better, go right ahead and buy it. It's made for minorities like you. Enjoy your

Smarter than the first film sure but Retaliation is full of cheesy, cliche', predictable sequences with over-the-top corny characters and a plot that becomes more convoluted the deeper you go. What makes it worse is that instead of knowing that its all of these things and not taking itself too seriously, it does the opposite it tries to be a highly serious action flick with comedic moments filled with supposedly what it thinks are brilliant action sequences but ultimately becomes a choppy, dull film with overused action sequences reminiscent (but not as well choreographed) as mediocre films such as the Transformers saga or Battleship. Its high point? The girls in the this movie: absolutely smoking hot. There some cool action scenes but overall, the movie itself suffers from so many elements that just basically destroys itself like a black hole. G.I. Retaliation is an example of what could've been a decent action flick let down by a horrible director (this is a guy with a lacking filmography with his last film being the Justin Bieber movie. Yes, I am totally serious), overuse of mediocre CG action sequences, some of the worst A grade movie action sequences Ive seen in a long time and shallow/2-dimensional cheesy characters. I feel like retaliation myself against this movie for taking away 2 hours of my life.

Emotionally and cinematically brilliant that surpasses the original in everyway and even the rebooted Garfield-Spidey. One of my favourite superhero films of all time alongside Dark Knight Rises, Iron Man 3 and The Avengers.

One of the most overrated movies of all time. Started brilliantly and continued to be good until they got to the antagonists...then it just went downhill from there. Had potential but they botched the climax and ending. Only watch if you're curious. Otherwise, avoid. Save your precious time for something else.

Shallow plot, shallow characters, shallow action and a horrible ending. They just took a hugeass dump on the original while creating one of the worst action flicks Ive seen in a long time. Hell, even Bourne Legacy was better than this pile of excrement. I felt sorry for the cast who had to put up with the cheap SFX, generic script and boring, uninspiring sequences that shouts below mediocrity. This should've been a made for TV movie from the start. Hell, had they retained the China vs U.S premise instead of this ridiculous North Korea vs U.S one it might've been a bit better. Because **** North Korean Army uses Hummers as part of their arsenal and are perfectly groomed like Korean pop stars. Avoid at all costs.

Cloud Atlas is a curious film. It sets its ambitions to astronomical levels but at the end of the days does what it does well but is not at all a revolutionary film nor is it free of flaws. There is an emotional prize at the end if you can bear with the long convolution plot with six distinct stories played by a handful of the same actors and actresses that transcend race and gender. My biggest gripe with the movie was without a doubt the inclusion of unnecessary scenes in the movie. Sure, the 1936 plot involved a bisexual male but did they have to really articulate homosexual innuendos to such degree? Its one thing to vouch for gender equality rights and another to gross the crap out of the audience. Every single person in the room who saw this film with me felt extremely uncomfortable at the gay scenes involving the 1936 music composer. I mean, sure he's gay we get that and we can empathize with his lovelife but I felt that the Wachowski's went overboard with the 'feel sorry for homos' stuff. On the other hand, was the revealing if mercifully brief sex scene involving Sonmi really necessary? A kissing scene would have sufficed. If I want to watch the intimate shots of an Asian woman GRINDING on some guy's ****, I would simply go to a porn site. Oh and what the hell is with the White-guy-with-Asian-makeup-to-make-them-look-Asian **** I dont mind the gender swaps in some of the plotlines. In fact, it just shows how talented actors like Weaving, Berry, Hanks and Grant be. Putting prosthetic makeup on a white guy to make him look Asian is not only laughable at viewing but is also ultimately offensive. Why not just hire a Asian actor? Would the plot really have suffered if they had not used the same actor seen in other plotlines? Apart from those little ****, the film excels in other departments. Cinematography is excellent, the acting brilliant and the film **** of the best in recent times. I just felt that the Cloud Atlas Sextet is ultimately underutilized in the film as a whole. Its often too faint to be heard or too brief to make an impact. Thankfully, the credits serves this purpose but at the end of the day, had they used the score more and in appropriate scenes, I felt that the movie would have benefited a lot more. While all six plotlines are great, in the end, the ones that felt most well done and enjoyable are without a doubt Rey's 1973 plot, Cavendish's 2012 plot and the Post-Apocalyptic Zachary plot. On the note of Zachary's story, it actually got me intrigued on the premise of it - so apparently the world collapsed under some cataclysm and humanity had been reduced to primitive tribes and a handful of still advance humans. I would've love to hear more about what happened at The Fall, how the Prescients had survived this and where they were in this era, what happened to the empty lands of the world after The Fall and on the colonies on the other planets. All in all, Cloud Atlas is a brilliant film that rewards the viewer with an emotional gift but at the expense of sitting through nearly 3 hours of elongated plotlines filled with action, drama and dull, unnecessary moments. This should've been a 2~2.5 hour film in this standard OR a 3 hour that's filled with info. Instead we get a 3 hour film that is essentially a 2 hour film stretched to its brim with rudimentary moments. You may hate it, you may love, but at the end of the day, it will have an impact on your movie-watching experience. An ambitious title that could've been a lot better had its significant flaws been ironed out and the Cloud Atlas sextet been utilized more frequently.

The worst of the already horrible film franchise that is an insult to the Resident Evil franchise to which it derives from. I am not even going to review this movie. Its just so bad, it insults Resident Evil canon so much that I feel like cracking the Blu-Ray disc in half. This the peak of an absolute **** of a movie franchise which I feel strays dangerously close to the horror of the Twilight films, and thanks to it, has cemented itself as my personal SECOND WORST FILM FRANCHISE OF ALL TIME. The first two films were alright, passable as Resident Evil films (and they're true to canon as well! Sort of...). From the third film onwards, well, it just went downhill. There's going to be a sequel, and yes I will be watching it for the sake of it. And no, I guarantee you, it will be complete **** and no, I am not a psychic. Avoid this pile of excrement at all costs, especially if you're into RE, because frankly I cannot see how much worse W.S **** Anderson can reduce the RE namesake even further down the **** pipe. The definition of ****.

(NOTE: This review covers only Vol. 2 of the Kill Bill Saga. For Vol. 1, see my profile page. For a complete overall score on the entire Kill Bill saga, see after this review) Part 2 of this elaborate revenge, murder rampage concentrates more on the actual plot and less on the violence. Is that good thing? No, not at all. The violence and fighting sequences as well as the unique blend of Asian cinema homages and cinematography are what actually kept Vol. 1 above 5/10 for me. However, for Vol. 2, the homages and unique style of Vol. 1 is almost completely non-existent (no, the training segment with Pai Mei does not qualify to a homage as its cliche' as hell and has been done hundreds of times in modern films), the action sequences are reduces to a few disappointing minutes, the actual movie itself is set in some of the most bland locales (as opposed to exotic locations of Vol. 1), and the **** just dont care anymore. The new characters dont really bring much to the table and are all uninspiring to the point of mediocrity. You can almost feel that Thurman herself as a character is losing steam as opposed to her great portrayal in Vol.1. And finally, they decided to focus on the plot, the weakest aspect of the entire saga. Well, I guess they have to. Imagine Transformers with barely any cool fight sequences and have Shia Lebouf and Optimus Prime talk for most of the film. This is like Vol. 2 - instead of more violent sequences in the unique style and soundtrack as pinpointed by Vol. 1, Vol. 2 decided to just throw all that in the bin and opted for a more quiet and ultimately, more lacking concluding film which, while wraps up Kiddo's tale (the final 'boss fight' just feels disjointed and lacks tension), is at the end of the day, becomes a cliche' drama rather than an action thriller. Dont watch this on drunk nights like Vol. 1, instead just read the wikipedia plot section. You're not missing anything by not watching it. Throwing away the elements which made Part 1 fun, Vol. 2 of Kill Bill is a mediocre, disappointing conclusion that feel like a Samurai warrior who basically used up all his strength for the first half of the fight while for the second half, decides to use a gun instead to finish his opponent. OVERALL: With Vol. 1 and 2 taken into considerable, Kill Bill feels disjointed with dramatic shifts to pace that just feels unnatural. Decent fight sequences, coupled with unique film styles and homages to Asian cinema make the first half of the saga enjoyable if you're feeling a little **** wheras you may be disappointed at the ending and concluding hour where the pace slackens and action is thrown out the window. Kill Bill as a whole with Vol. 1 and 2 combined receives a 6/10. A decent, intriguing piece of cinema that will divide audiences and is ultimately an enjoyable thriller for those after something more raw and intimate.

What do u get when u fuse anime-esque characters with interesting yet ultimately mediocre fight scenes that have been done to death in decades of Chinese Wu-Shia films and mix it all with 70's martial arts music and artstyle all packaged in a sloppy plot that acts as merely an excuse for the over-the-top-to-the-point-of-comedic violence? You get Kill Bill Vol 1, the first part of essentially an elaborate revenge, murderous rampage plan of the so-called ex-killer, 'The Bride' Kiddo. In many respects, the violence in some aspects overshoots its intended artistic form and becomes rather disturbing, even for a fully-grown 22 yo male like myself who indulges often in gory video games. Uma Thurman is brilliant and some visual cinematography is brilliant. The homage to Chinese Wu-Shia and Japanese Samurai films will provide nostalgia for many (like myself, who is 1/4 Japanese and 3/4 Chinese) while if you're not really into those types of films, you may be disappointed. Kill Bill Vol. 1 is very much just a violent showcase of bloodlust and dismembering fetish, where you will laugh, grimace, cringe and get high all at the same time. Its an experience, an unique one that's not for the faint-hearted. If you're expecting a crime/mafia revenge tale, this is not the film you're after. If you want to watch a single, Caucasian blondie cut her way through dozens of human beings all in great, bloodthirsty detail with the occasional backstory, this is that film. Kill Bill Vol. 1 is not a movie. Its a visual, bloodfest with chaotic martial arts sequences that at times, just dont feel fluid or flow as well as the the major martial arts blockbusters from China or Japan. Save this for those drunken nights where you have ran out of anime to watch (unlikely), manga to read (even more unlikely) or decent games to play (impossible).

Its unfortunate but I was expecting great things for this movie. I am a huge Bourne fan, having read the Ludlum novels and watched the Bourne trilogy at least 5 fives already. Seeing the average reviews for The Bourne Legacy I was determined that this could not ****. It could not. Oh how wrong I was. Having got this movie on Blu-Ray just recently, I was pumping for this film. First ten minutes in, I had a horrible feeling. This feels...wrong. Half an hour in, I was like, hey it seems to be picking up. Now, I am not asking for a lot of action. To be honest, I want a movie to be balance of action and dialogue. A lot of the diehard fanboys of this movie (A few in the metacritic reviews) attack those of us who gave his movie mediocre scores as they accuse us of giving it a bad score due to the fact that 'there's not much/not as much action scenes as the previous Bourne films'. To that I say, bullsht. In fact, the action scenes in this movie are alright and the lack of them isn't key in bringing down the score. What does bring it down is a combination of several elements. Firstly, the plot. The plot has to be one of the worst action film plot Ive seen in recent years. And the bad thing is, they're serious here. Unlike the Expendables 1 and 2 where they know its bad so they dont take the plot seriously, Legacy takes it all way too seriously. The movie is full of rudimentary segments and parts that felt way too long. It felt almost like as if the writer wrote a epic plot with visits to several exotic locations, plot twists and sequences. Instead, in filming, they discovered that the script was too long and it was too late to shorten it down. So they just did what they did. About what can be done in 30~50minutes stretched out into 2 hours. Nice work guys. It almost felt like a chore watching this movie after 40 minutes because it just felt so slow and plot progression movie like a slug up a ramp. Unlike the previous Bourne films which mixed a variety of sequences (chases, gun scenes, escapes etc) with excellent plot dialogue segments, Legacy just fills about 85% of the movie with slow dialogue segments that do little to move the story forward and throws in 2 fight scenes, each only around 2 minutes long and single chase scene at the end. That's it. And the asset send to hunt down our protagonists? He's apparently superior to the assets seen the previous Bourne films as he's in a newer, superior program. But heck, in the ****'s not that good. Especially when going against Renner, who is in an inferior program to Bourne. And why the Philippines? That's right folks, half the movie takes place in Manila. I have nothing against the Philippines and have been there before. Its a great country...just with a lot of uninteresting places and lots of slums. Its not really the ideal locale for a top-notch action film. Had this been set in say, Japan, Korea or China or hell, have it back in Europe like the previous Bourne films, it would've been a lot more appealing. Its like saying, "hey, lets set Lord of the Rings in a swamp and have it there for half the movie!". Or "Hey, lets have The Dark Knight set in Antarctica! That's exotic right?" And I felt sorry for Jeremy Renner. This guy has done a great job in this film and its sad to see the rest of the movie being utter dung. Now Rachel **** she's a hot milf. Since The Mummy Returns, Ive always had something for her. She's hot. But her acting? Its alright, not too bad, but there are some scenes where you would just **** this an industry veteran or some new girl on the block. But yea, at least she's a much-needed eyecandy for this horrible film. Bourne Legacy doesn't receive a 3/10 purely due to a lack of good action scenes. In fact, its action scenes are okay and while there is a lack of them, its not the critical factor. The crucial aspect that nails this film in its coffin is the combination of a boring/shallow plot, boring characters (and a complete lack of chemistry, good or bad, between the Weiz and Renner to the point where it feels like they hate each others guts in real life and wanted to avoid doing anything/speaking with one another), a lame premise, bad locale choice and basically, having next to no relations with the Bourne Trilogy. Its like Prometheus to Alien...sure there's the hints and links here and there, but its not the same thing. This is The Bourne Legacy. While I can see Prometheus fit within the Alien universe, Legacy doesn't really feel like its part of the Bourne universe. Sure, it has Jason Bourne it **** TV, but overall, if you remove the 'Bourne' title in this movie, it really would not making a difference. So shallow, uninspiring and boring, this film dampened the Bourne namesake so bad that I had to rewatch the Bourne Trilogy again just to make myself feel better. A horrible, Grade-B spinoff of the Bourne franchise with no class nor brains.

I gave this movie a chance. I really did. But it just takes my intelligence, crushes it and stuff a cartload of dung into my brain. It felt like a mixture of cinematic ****, utter boredom and cringeworthy acting/sequences that make this the worst movie I've seen in a very long time. Twilight feels like a B-grade, made for TV movie, only that they managed to get a decent camera for the job. About the only half-decent component is the cinematography. Its definitely well shot. As for the main juice of the ****'d be wondering why on earth anyone would make this movie apart from milking the cash out of Tweens and their poor boyfriends. Apart from some supporting characters who have passable acting, the main characters lack the skill and aptitude to produce even an a line of dialogue that wont leave you cringing or in some cases, wishing you were dead so the torture would end. Tweens would defend this pile of excrement to their deaths and I say, feel free. The world can judge. And thankfully, most people who have a conscience would stray clear of this horror. Yes, tweens, there are a lot of females out there who hate/aren't give a fck about Twilight than there are those who would. Get that fact right. I am not even going do a review for the other sequels as I WRITE THIS AS A WARNING TO ALL: This is almost as bad as Batman & Robin and is universally claimed by critics who were not bribed by the producers as the worst movie franchise of the 21st century, if not in all of movie history. I literally felt my IQ drop by spades during the movie. Please, save yourself and avoid this. I saw this out of pure curiosity. Dont even try to do what I did. Its not worth it.

Presents itself as a more accurate interpretation of the webslinging hero and coupled with some nice action scenes and a more-likeable Peter Parker, its a solid film. A solid film full of discrepancies. While it does present itself as an excellent reboot to the franchise, The original Spider-man movies and esp, Spider-man 2, despite the occasional cheesiness and non-canon elements, does convey a more Spider-man vibe to it - it feels like Spider-man, genuine Spider-man as opposed to this version which, while decent, does feel detracted from the overall feel of Spider-man. The world itself apart from Parker, Uncle Ben and Gwen Stacey, lack character and feels more like a well-shot action film that coincidently has Spider-man in it. Seriously, if you placed a different main character in the movie and just have Spider-man as a side line character, the film would be fine. Its a great film but ultimately, it just doesn't have the feel and distinct 'Spidey-ness' of the original films. Spider-man 2 remains my favourite.

The first half of the film: brilliantly shot and full of excellent action sequences. The later **** like as if a teenage **** came into the production studio, replaced the final sections of the script with his weirdass, cheesy fight scenes and a crappy ending and managed to convince the director to keep them when they found out it happened. I was sceptical going into this reboot. There's no Mars, the premise is exactly the same and many plot elements are recycled. But the first hour it convinced me otherwise: this is going to be epic. Awesome cinematography and tense fight/chase scenes in a beautiful, futuristic city (so beautiful that I actually want to live there) and more action/great dialogue after. Then, without warning, the movie just went downhill. You know, like a ferrari suddenly having punctured tires, following by engine problems and everything slowly goes to **** This is the 2012 Total Recall. You just watch a great movie, brilliantly shot (one of the best ive seen in a long time) with awesome action scenes all on top of a well-loved story, slowly get peppered with **** and eventually, a cartload of **** And then when you hit the ending, you'll be cutting yourself. Had they retained the awesome futurisitic utopia/minory repory-esque fantasy world with tight action scenes so evident in the first half of the film for the entire film and had a satisfying climax and ending, I would've given this film a 8/10 or even a 9/10. Sadly, dunno what happened to the script writer in the final pages of the movie script . Maybe he got drunk. Maybe he just got frickin lazy. Or maybe he got jacked into rekall and a false memory implanted when finishing the final sections of the script. Srsly, when you watch this movie, right after Quaid arrives at the Resistance base, just turn off the movie - it gets fully ****house from there and even Brian Cranston's awesome acting could've save it. Though there's another two things that this movie did right - it cemented and consolidated Kate Beckinsale as one of my favourite actresses and added Jessica Biel to my **** list.

I dont usually say this but WHY are you reading this? Go out and watch this NOW. Brilliant acting, a brilliant plot where everything clicks and excellent sequences - Looper is my favourite film of the year alongside Dark Knight Rises. And it beats the hell out of The Avengers. There are minor loopholes if you think hard enough but overall, its as enjoyable as Inception and definitely, a well-rounded film on an intriguing premise. A movie with the brains and passion that you will definitely enjoy. If you love Inception, you'll love this film. It makes you think and gives you a satisfying conclusion.

What more can I ask for if I want a drunken movie session to torture my friends? Crappy acting (with the exception of Charlize Theron), esp Kirsten Stewart, cheesy/awkward dialogue/lines, horrible fight scenes that border on even more awkwardness and so many cliche'/unexplainedly **** sequences that combine to make this my personal WORST FILM OF 2012. Avoid at all costs. A great cast (well, except for probably Stewart) is almost completely wasted and in most cases, you cant feel that the film tries to hard to appear as a 'dark' fantasy. Had the script been better written and had the acting been better, I am sure this movie would've soared. Sadly, it all becomes a cheesy-as-hell translation **** fairy tale classic that takes itself way too seriously with a lot of awkward and boring segments. Only under 15yo's, **** & rednecks who dont know better as well as young/naive female viewers will enjoy this movie. This has been a pain to watch and apart from nearly dozing off, on two occasions I switched from the movie in my blu-ray player to watch the frickin news because it was so bad. Dont be deceived by its dark cinematography (oh yea thats about the only good thing this movie has) and the lines of stars in this. Its essentially horrible B-grade rubbish disguised up with high budget wrappings. Once you open it, you'll regret it, no matter even if the wrapping paper is made out of gold. Oh look at all the good user ratings. And now look at the usernames. Yep, all young, ignorant, Twilight-influenced females who dont know better. Be smart, have class, join the sensible people of society and avoid this trash.

Okay, first and foremost, the zombies themselves have issues. They DONT behave like zombies. They REACT to injury. Minor injuries can CRIPPLE them. They can PICK UP things and USE things. They can think for crying out loud. They can RUN. And why is the incubation period so erratically different its ridiculous. The protagonist's husband who is bitten at the start of the movie turns like a few seconds whereas another character who I wont mention to avoid spoiling the plot turns after what seems like a WEEK after being bitten. Its ridiculous. Oh and get what, BURNING zombies kills them. I can hear people cutting themselves to that/ Pro tip to those out there who dont know how to the survive the zombie apocalypse: Zombies are DEAD people who are infected with a BLOOD-BORNE virus (though this is debatable in other variations) that kills the host and takes control of their body after they are deceased. They want to feast on ALL living things INCLUDING animals. They are slow and can at best, jog if a prey attracts them. They can grab for things mindlessly but they CANT open doors, use weapons or pick up things, Zack Snyder! Nor can they be CRIPPLE by minor wounds like gunshots - they DONT feel PAIN, they're DEAD. Oh and Mr Snyder, the makeup of the zombies, why do they look like HUMANS instead of badly mauled walking corpses? The lines are horrible at times while at other instances they're brilliantly written. There are some tense moments but in most cases, you'll be just yelling at the screen and be utterly frustrated at how ridiculously naive, dumb and stupid the characters are. Seriously. For instance, stupidity No. 1: NO ONE knew what made the people turn into zombies despite many of them seeing people get bitten and turning e.g the protagonist's husband. Not only until around 1/3 of the way into the movie do the main characters realize "Oh maybe its the bite?" *facepalm* You are tell obviously who's gonna die (and they do) and you'll be cutting yourself at the most stupidass things the characters would do. WHY, WHY would you GO AFTER your DOG amidst the HUNDREDS of zombies that want to EAT you IF you know they WONT hurt your dog? Srsly that thing there, is what caused the plot to climax and end as it did. Had that certain character NOT gone after her dog and stayed with the plan, I am sure NO ONE would've been killed. And WHY do the characters just use **** pistols and shotguns? You have a GUNSTORE for God's sakes, there are things called RIFLES that are MORE accurate and also automatic & semi-automatic weapons all with a crapload of ammo. Why not just clear the streets? Why not use the damn rifles? Seriously the ENTIRE movie, they just stick to horrible horrible pistols (GLOCKS just damn GLOCKS for crying out loud. There must be Desert Eagles and M9's lying around in the store!) and those mediocre cop shotguns. Had they used a M16, M4A1 Carbine, SAW machine gun or hell even a plain old Lee Einfield, I am sure everyone would've survived. This is a movie that you watch drunk with your buddies on a Friday night. You'll probably watch it and forget about it, and probably switch to playing Left 4 Dead. The original 1970's Dawn of the Dead is vastly superior despite the outdated makeup effects. Watch that. Avoid this insult to the zombie canon pile of excrement at all costs. Hell even the ending is lacking. A braindead film that absolutely wont want to feast upon.

I know its trying to be a metaphor for modern horror films. I know its also a black humour horror with a brilliant twist. Yes, there is a twist and no its impact isn't exactly profound as they tell us that IN THE TRAILER ALREADY. When you watch a horror film, you come for the scares and the thrills. Cabin in the Woods gives you none of the former and dishes out the latter in a ridiculous, dark-humourly manner. Its not a bad thing but its call a horror movie, not a black humour monster fantasy slasher. The final half an hour is plain ridiculous and feels more like a Resident Evil movie who's overdosed on heroin and overused gory props in distasteful scenes. Indeed, its paying homage to horror films and esp the ambience created by H.P Lovecraft but seriously, for most viewers (i.e. 80% of us who dont usually indulge in hardcore horror flicks). its just...weird. If you're a true horror fan, you may love this movie. For me, however, someone who just wants to thrilled and be enthralled in a scare-fest, this became a bore of a film which would've been a lot more interesting had more of the movie made any sense. Add in the Lovecraft factor that you may love or hate, and you have what feels like a B-grade gore flick that caters only for the true horror fans and leaves the rest of us in the cold. Decide for yourself whether you enjoy the taste of this flick but I am sitting on the fence for this one, my stomach impaled by a unicorn.

Nolan done it again. TDKR is a triumph, held down by some minor ****. Surprisingly, despite my initial negative view of Anne Hathaway as catwoman, I felt that Hathaway has done a terrific job being catwoman and really, this is her sexiest role yet. However, her screentime was a tad lacking and to be honest, her contribution to the actual plot is minor if not unecessary if taking a harsh stance. The brilliant plot, great combination of soundtrack and visual enticements as well as brilliant acting retains the excellent Nolan formula that everyone would enjoy. The fight scenes are genuine not cliche' or death-defyingly unrealistic. The twists in the film will get you, no matter how hard you think each time. And throw in a controversial, highly debatable, ambiguous-as-hell ending for good effect (as always). The chemistry just works and really does prove Nolan's prowess as a director and writer. Dont get me wrong, the movie's not perfect. There are so many plot elements there that can be debated for and many characters actually go against the batman canon (watch for the twist near the end. For avid batman fanboys out there and those who's played Batman: Arkham City, you'll be cutting yourself). Is this better than the Dark Knight? No, not really. Is it worse? No, definitely not. Sure Heath Ledger's joker was a sensation, take that away and apart from some thrills, the 2nd movie is definitely sub-par to TDKR by a cat's whisker. Ultimately, it does have some neglible flaws that you probably wont care if you're just watching the movie for fun. If you're a deep thinker and adopted an 'Inception'-esque mindset to the film, you will find many discrepancies in the plot flow. My money for Nolan's best film is still Inception but TDKR is without question THE best action/superhero film of the year. Sorry, Avengers. While I enjoy Avengers (a LOT to be honest), TDKR just tops the comedy-action formula the Avengers had and introduced the standard Nolan-excellence that we have all witnessed before. An intelligent film with class, brilliant execution and acting definitely tops an all-out action film reliant on CG-sequences/witty dialogue/a truckload of top-end, expensive Hollywood stars.

Oh God the lines. I know its suppose to be cheesy but God, I haven't cringed so much in a movie in recent years due to purely the **** corny as hell dialogue. Esp that Yu Nan actress - why the hell is she in tis movie? ("Oh aromatic duck is so sexy". Who the HELL calls the food 'sexy'? And God, her manner and her way of saying things...arrogant and really really try-hard at best). Did the Chinese government had some sort off part in the funding the film? She really screwed up the movie for me. She's like a light bulb - the movie would still be fine without her. Why not get Gong Li, Michelle Yeoh or Lucy Liu? =______=