Emang90

Another pointless live-action Disney remake that we didn't need or want but somehow returned and managed to make its way towards a theatrical release. I guess Disney didn't learn their lessons from their last two movies: Snow White and Lilo & Stitch. Both of those two movies underperformed and lost money. Now, this one did, and will go down in history, being the third worst attempt by Disney. They are overly indulgent at butchering their own ips. Dwayne The Rock Johnson simply can't act and certainly can't make movie theaters money for theatrical released pictures. He's not lead actor material and he's not an actor. He's a brand. Nothing more, nothing less. The You're Welcome song that Dwayne The Rock Johnson sang was done by autotune, and the lead actress who played Moana couldn't even cry on scene. Her face was dry as a desert and that's pretty pathetic, especially since she's the lead actress and literally portraying the main character of the film itself. The buildings, mountains, waves, and trees looked fake. Nothing felt real or authentic because it's so obvious that everyone must've been standing behind a green screen which diminishes their acting abilities towards carrying pivotal scenes and moments regarding personal growth and character development. The fire monster/goddess and animals are CGI. Even they aren't interesting, nor is the journey that lies ahead. This movie is about as memorable as a fart in the wind. By the time today, tomorrow or whenever, people would've already forgotten all about it and move onto the next big thing, being a bland nothing burger and so fourth. OMG, this movie **** and I fell asleep through the first half because of how boring and disengaging it is. I found myself dosing on-and-off, although that was some moments where I was actually able to stay awake but not throughout tough, unfortunately. Terrible costumes and wig choices which looks like something that came outta Party City. Wow, its no wonder why this live-action Disney Moana remake looks cheaply made, despite them having gone way over budget and money that they'll never fully get back, just to break even. Disney, please for the love of God, stop making live-action remakes. They have never been good and I don't want more of these kinda movies. Quiet frankly, I don't think that anyone does, although I can't necessarily speak for everybody else. Overall, it should've stayed as a streaming movie to watch onto Disney Plus since people are already paying for their weekly and or monthly subscriptions. Other than that, you're not missing out on anything special or remarkable in any way, shape or form. It's a DUD for sure and that is no cap but if you ever decide to watch it, feel free to check it out. Hard pass. Don't recommend. Skip it. 2/10

If Home Improvement and Swingers had a baby and then The Invite was born. The Invite (2026) is a drunken and pretentious alcoholic bore. This movie takes away any actual joy of being in a relationship with your significant other. It's so mean spirited and ugly in nature. There is nothing special about this movie and its the kinda movie to see, if you hate yourself. I don't know who told Olivia Wilde that she can direct a motion picture because the camera work and cinematography is absolutely horrendous, not to mention the bad lighting, blurry motion capture, and awful color grading. She's a better actress than she is as a film director. Seth Rogen and Olivia Wilde are horribly miscast. There is no chemistry between the two lead actors. The only good actors in this unfunny drama were Edward Norton and Penelope Cruz, which is ashame because they aren't really given much to do. Nobody is giving a good performance in this movie, outside Edward Norton and Penelope Cruz, maybe. If this movie wasn't so obnoxious, then just maybe it would've been a fantastic movie to watch in theaters or on streaming. Other than that, it's a NO for me and should've been a few minutes shorter. Hard pass. Don't recommend. Skip it. 1/10

Not enough blood and gore in battle sequences. The shots being fired from a bow are often confusing and clumsy because the faulty camera work keeps moving around too much which makes it difficult to see who got hit, and there's moments where its too dark to see where certain characters going to and from place to place, and so fourth. For a rated R historic mythology tale, it surprisingly feels very PG-13, if anything. There's not a whole lotta cursing and there's no sex scenes or nudity involved, either. The monsters look terrible and they aren't very threatening or intimidating for that matter which is ashame. Same with them constantly name dropping Zeus and Hades but they never actually showcase them in anyway whatsoever, which would've helped this movie a long way. Elliott Page got hit with two arrows came out looking ridiculously cartoony and he runs quite feminine, which was unintentionally funny. Matt Damon's main character being stranded onto a island alongside with Charlize Theron felt like an unscripted version outta Cast Away, just without the volleyball named Wilson. Travis Scott and Zendaya are both horribly miscast. They aren't used effectively which makes their presence quite distracting and unnecessary. John Leguizamo was soft spoken and there was moments where I couldn't understand what he was saying and it was almost like they dubbed his dialogue with Automated Dialogue Replacement (ADR). Tom Holland, great actor who lacks in combat experience and fighting choreography. When I saw him, all I could think was Spider-Man. Not a young prince heir trying to claim his rightful place as ruler. They should've gone with Timothe'e Chalamet instead, at least then, he would've been more believeable. The sound and score was way too loud and criminally overused which made the movie feel like a bloated, claustrophobic mess. It should've been used towards the very end, not throughout. Three hours, I'll never fully get back, and it took me right outta the movie because of it's unnecessarily way too long running time, and the flashbacks should've been the first chapter which would've been a more satisfying opening. It could've been a few minutes shorter so that way the characters could've been better grounded and given more room to grow as characters in a fictional story. It's definitely not as great as everybody is making it out to being. Way too overhyped and overwhelmingly tiresome. I don't like the modernized dialogue and some of the lines whenever engaging in conversations felt weird and outta place. I don't like this movie personally and I'm not exactly the biggest Christopher Nolan fan in the world. I like some of his films but not many tough. The pacing was extremely frustrating and everything felt clunky and uneven. Nothing flowed properly. There was moments where I found myself dosing on-and-off watching The Odyssey (2026) but not throughout tough. I wasn't a fan. Just okay. Pretty mid at best. 5/10

Watching Her Private Hell in theaters upon the big screen was basically hell on Earth, but with a pathetic payoff. This movie was so bad that it doesn't make any sense and I found it confusing on what kinda film it wanted to be and what story they wanted to tell. It wants to be The Leather Man in a David Lynch kinda movie and a psychedelic fever like dream with the female characters dressed like David Bowie into a completely different Star Trek universe. I'm like: "Who was this made for?" More importantly, the acting performances are atrocious across the board, and the dialogue is absolutely abysmal. Nobody is giving a good performance in this movie and that's saying something. Everybody is robotic because of how badly acted and written they are and neither one of them have any personality to carry this movie as a whole. No emotions, range, feelings. Nothing. They give me nothing to latch onto or care about which is disappointing. Her Private Hell was a mixed bag, to say the least, and they couldn't even pull it off and execute it properly. Her Private Hell is an artsy, pretentious bore. This movie **** and it could've been a great movie into the hands of another director, writer, and producer. Her Private Hell should've came with a warning because of the glaring and strobing lights, especially if anyone is prone to seizures and epilepsy. Viewer discretion is advised and watch with caution. Everything felt clunky and uneven. Nothing flowed properly. Hard pass. Don't recommend. Skip it. 0/10